


Asadal

by porkjihoon



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Everyone Is Gay, First Love, Fluff and Crack, Friends to Lovers, Light Angst, M/M, Slice of Life, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2019-06-26 04:38:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 41,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15655914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/porkjihoon/pseuds/porkjihoon
Summary: Don't all the best love stories start off with two new college boys and a model penis? ♡





	1. Dicking Around

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a conversation with a mutual, I thought it may be handy to have a little guide book to help visualize elements of the story!  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jaemin ♡**

 

“Oh! Before we leave, we have something for you,” said Na Jaemin’s mom, excitedly.

“Mom,” Jaemin began. “You didn’t have to get me anything.”

Dismissing the notion, his mom motioned over to his dad, who brought out a framed poster of a gorgeous, dark-haired boy, tied up neatly with a white bow. Jaemin immediately felt the heat rising to his face when he recognized who was gazing back at him.

“Mom! Dad! I can’t put  _ this _ up!”

Hands still around the gift that he had helped pick out, his dad replied, “Jaemin! But, you  _ love  _ Kai!” 

He happily pushed the present into his son’s arms, clearly aware of how red Jaemin’s cheeks were becoming as the three of them shared hugs and “I love you”s and bittersweet goodbyes. Despite Jaemin’s embarrassment at just how well his parents knew him, he thanked them for always being so thoughtful, carefully placing his new decoration against a wall and quickly closing the door to his dorm room. 

_ Now, what do I do with this?  _ Jaemin had to put it  _ somewhere _ —it was a present from his family, after all...and he wasn’t going to be sharing the room with anyone else, so he figured he’d at least have one of his favorite idols to keep him company. Eventually, he chose to hang the poster beside his bed, currently half-lofted due to all of the available space.  _ Kai looked good up there. _ Jaemin sighed, feeling satisfied with his work, yet already missing his parents.  _ Well _ ,  _ I can’t say that they’re not supportive.  _

At the foot of his bed sat a small desk and chair that had been provided by University Housing. Light filled the dorm through a large window that faced directly across from the door, making the cream-colored walls feel more welcoming than they actually were. Jaemin’s family helped move in a microwave and mini-fridge to the his room’s right corner, the latter of which he made use of in the form of a carton of chocolate milk. Treat in hand, he shuffled across the wooden floor towards the blue futon that his mom had insisted that he bring “in case he met some friends that wanted to spend the night.” Taking in the new surroundings, Jaemin laid his feet on the small table in the center of the room and took a sip. 

“So, this is it,” he said to himself, still not entirely convinced that he was spending his first day at Daehaekgyo University. Classes would be starting next Tuesday, exactly one week from today. Until then, welcome week would be filled with (hopefully) making new friends and reluctantly completing all the tasks assigned to new students. Jaemin unlocked his phone, examining the checklist of his obligations in his Notes app:

  * Move in! ✓
  * Say goodbye to mom and dad :( ✓
  * Alcohol-Education 101 (online) ✓
  * Let’s Talk About Sex! 1:00-2:30 pm @The Cube, AUD HHH ꗃ



Jaemin sighed, imagining the various discussions about consent and safe sex and pregnancy that’d he have to sit through, which while very necessary, only applied so much to the young boy’s own personal life. After discussing whether or not there’d be serious consequences for ditching the session, he figured he might as well go now, so he wouldn’t have to make anything up in the future (as if he would ever actually skip something that he was required to do). Na Jaemin was nothing, if not a good boy. His phone’s clock read 12:36 pm.   _ Let’s get this over with _ . 

Next to either side of the door were two closets. He looked into the wall mirror beside the one nearest to his bed, examining his appearance. Jaemin took pride in his looks, thankful for his bright eyes and big smile that earned the affection of everyone that he came across. When it came to his clothes, he preferred to keep things simple. Today’s outfit was just that—a pastel pink crewneck sweater, a pair of jeans, and white Converse highs. He continued to view himself in the mirror, moving a loose strand of light brown hair back towards one side of his forehead. Maybe it was because he’d always been labeled as every adjective that remotely meant the same thing as “cute,” or the semi-conscious realization that he was now a college student, but he felt like his outfit needed something  _ else _ to it. Sorting through hanger after hanger, Jaemin draped a black leather jacket over his shoulders like a cape of sorts. Although he didn’t feel used to the reflection looking back at him—he even felt somewhat silly for trying so hard to look good for a sex-education seminar—he readjusted the jacket on his narrow frame and headed out for the first time on his own.

♡ ♡ ♡

Daehaekgyo University interwove elements of a typical college town and the big city together into one distinct place. Here, resident halls could be found just as easily surrounded by libraries and trendy bubble tea shops as they were located next to company headquarters and designer clothing stores. Named after the pink flower varieties that abundantly bloomed nearby during the midsummer, Dansim Hall, where Jaemin would be staying for the year, was an exception to this pattern. In exchange for the natural serenity that its residents enjoyed, the walk from Dansim to central campus took about 15 minutes. There, students had easy access to pursuing academics and adventures (though the latter option was, by far, more preferable). 

Having been recently remodeled, The Cube was an aptly-named building in the heart of campus, with four symmetrical walls that were heavily covered in rows of glossy windows, highlighting the busy lives of Daehaekgyo’s scholars to all who looked through the glass. Aside from its modern design, the Cube attracted students from all throughout campus, whether it be to attend classes, study (or just as often, procrastinate) in its 24-hour computing site, or for large presentations in its lecture halls, one of which Jaemin was heading to right now. By the time that he reached Auditorium HHH, most of the seats had already been taken. Narrowing down his options, he took an empty spot within the first few rows. 12:57. It was about time to start.

_ Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.  _ The sound of high heels walking into the room brought Jaemin back to reality, but the owner of those shoes instantly captured his undivided interest. In walked a brunette woman in her mid-twenties, who wore an light blue oversized shirt as a dress underneath a white Champion-brand sweater. Regardless of her youthful looks, her presence could be felt throughout the room as everyone turned their stares towards her.

“Hello, I am Kim Hyuna, a graduate student here at Daehaekgyo,” she announced, straightening her glasses. “Let’s talk about sex.”

Jaemin could hear both boys and girls near him as they marvelled at their instructor. Never in his life had he seen teenagers be so... _ excited _ to learn about sex-education. The sheer amount of shouted guesses to her resembled more of a fanchant at a concert than college students participating during a lecture. Hyuna was intelligent, confident—she radiated charisma. All eyes were on her until…

“This…,” started Hyuna, “...is one of my good friends, Hui.” Collectively, the lecture hall sat in stifled silence at his introduction. If anyone could somehow take the attention away from Hyuna, it was Hui: a 6-inch model of a human penis. “We’re going to teach you how to put on a condom. Are there any volunteers to be my assistant?”

In any other circumstance, Jaemin was sure that everybody in the room would’ve fought to be that close to Hyuna. In reality, the students couldn’t hold in their feelings, simultaneously amused and worried at the prospect of having to touch the dild–Hui, in front of their peers. Hyuna pursed her red lips, searching the now quiet crowd. Her gaze landed on someone in the second row. “Could you help me today, please?”

From his seat, Jaemin could see the chosen boy’s eyes widen in disbelief, accompanied by an inaudible “huh?” to no one in particular. Hyuna shook her head up and down. Together, the audience let out a sigh of relief, which in no time, gave way to a few pitiful snickers of good luck to the poor individual headed towards the table on which Hui sat. Her victim was a handsome, black-haired boy, about the same height as Jaemin, who was dressed in a light yellow button-up that was left untucked in the back of form-fitting dark jeans. Drawing closer and closer, the older woman asked her volunteer for his name. He turned, off-guard, and muttered to the crowd, “Uhh, hello. My name is Lee Jeno.”

As if Jaemin didn’t think his first day at Daehaekgyo was weird enough, when he saw Jeno introduce himself, standing next to Hyuna and Hui, the model penis, two thoughts immediately rushed into his mind:  _ 1) Lee Jeno might just be the cutest boy I have ever seen and 2) this is literally the LEAST sexiest way that I could meet my future boyfriend _ .

“First of all, what you need to do is check the expiration date on the condom because  _ yes _ , to everyone out there, they can expire if you wait too long to use them,” explained Hyuna, handing an unopened wrapper to her assistant. “Next, you’re going to open up the condom wrapper with your fingers, not your teeth or anything else because you might put a hole in the condom itself, which will render it fairly useless in preventing unwanted pregnancies and sexually-transmitted infections,  _ and _ ...that’s not cute.” Oddly enough, as the grad student continued her demonstration, despite Jeno’s not so subtle attempt at trying to hide his discomfort, the boy was listening very intently to her instructions as if this was a serious task and not the precursor to handling fake male genitals in front of a crowded lecture hall. Jaemin found this behavior interesting, perhaps, almost endearing given the current circumstances, before proceeding to wonder why he found anything about this situation remotely attractive.

“Once you’ve opened the wrapper, pinch the tip of the condom like this,” Hyuna instructed the room. “And roll it down onto the penis.” She nodded, this time, only to the boy beside her. “That’s you and Hui.” The mass of students waited with anticipation as Jeno picked up the model penis with one hand and followed Hyuna’s advice with the other, doing his best not to cringe. “Wow,” the instructor happily exclaimed. “You’ve done this a lot, haven’t you, Jeno?” Right on cue, the viewers erupted in raucous laughter. Jeno giggled too, though likely due to embarrassment more so than humor, causing an adorably bashful smile to form across his lips and his eyes, which met Jaemin’s own in the audience. 

“Give Jeno a round of applause, everyone,” called a voice from the back, prompting off-beat clapping and whistles and cheers as Hyuna allowed her assistant to return to his seat. Jaemin continued to stare longingly at the boy, who returned Hui to the table as fast as he could and never looked back.  _ This is really happening, isn’t it? I have a crush on the boy that just had a fake dick in his hand.  _ 2:31. They were dismissed. Jaemin had to say something to Jeno. Now.

_ This is it _ , thought Jaemin to himself, rearranging his jacket and hair.  _ I have to make a good first impression. You got this. _ So, Na Jaemin, looking as charming as possible, went up to Jeno and confidently told the other boy what he believed would be the absolute best way to win him over: “Hey! Good job up there!”

_ Fuck. _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first fic that I've ever written, so I really hope that y'all enjoy! NCT is my favorite group and perhaps, what truly not only got me into fanfiction, but also k-pop as a whole. Stay tuned for regular updates (I promise they're coming) every Sunday at 12:00 pm EST! ♡


	2. KCON DAEHAEKGYO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jeno ♡**

 

The past 15 minutes may have been the worst experience of Jeno’s life. And to top it off, someone really followed him out the door to tell him “Good job up there!”  _ Haven’t I suffered enough today? _ Jeno turned his head to see who he assumed would be a smug student. Instead, he found himself face to face with a soft-looking boy whose sheepish expression seemed to suggest genuine sympathy rather than teasing pride. Seeing him made Jeno’s embarrassment all worth it. He knew he’d do it all over again just to see that smile.

“Uh, thank you. I tried my best,” Jeno replied, happily surprised. “My name is Jeno, by the way, if you didn’t hear it back there.” The two boys laughed together, finding themselves by a wall outside of the auditorium. “What’s your name?”

“Jaemin,” he answered sweetly, his hands clasped underneath his jacket. Jeno could feel himself get warmer upon hearing Jaemin introduce himself.

“Jaemin,” repeated Jeno as if the name was a love song. “It’s nice to meet you, Jaemin.” Jeno couldn’t keep himself from saying it. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a folded flyer that he had been given earlier. “Are you busy right now, Jaemin? Maybe we could go check this out, if you want...and if you’re not busy.”  _ Smooth _ .

The boy dressed in pink got closer, making Jeno’s heart beat that much faster.

“Let’s go.”

♡ ♡ ♡

Every year, welcome week at Daehaekgyo University involved many things, including moving in, orientation activities, partying, drinking, and KCON. No, not  _ that  _ KCON, but “K” as in “Klub”—Daehaekgyo thinks they’re  _ so _ clever. KCON was an annual event in which student organizations from across the university gathered on central campus in hopes that their respective groups might attract some new members. Tents and tables of all shapes, sizes, and colors lined the walkways, spreading into the grass due to the huge variety of clubs available to join. 

“Does anything seem interesting to you, Jaemin-ah?” Jaemin’s lips curved upwards, growing fond of the way Jeno called for him.

“I think we can take our time,” Jaemin responded. “What do you like to do?”

Jeno sorted through his mind for something interesting that he could tell the other boy. 

“Ah,” he began. “I’ve always liked acting.”

“At your school?”

“You might not believe me, but I was in some commercial films when I was a kid.”

Jaemin’s eyes widened in excitement. “No way. Would there be any that I’d recognize?”

Jeno knew the answer prior to Jaemin needing to ask. Turning his hand into the shape of a cup, he proceeded to take an imaginary sip and finished by wiping his mouth and showing off an open grin.

Jaemin threw his hands to his mouth in shock, knocking the leather jacket off of his torso. “You’re the Ang-Pang boy?”

“Yup, that’s me.” Jeno bent down and picked the garment off the ground, taking his time to wrap it around Jaemin’s thin frame. Indeed, the CF that Jeno had been most known for was one advertising Ang-Pang, a Seoul Milk product catered towards children. He still had the same smile today as he did back then, one that covered his whole face from top to bottom. “I don’t know if I want to do some more acting here at school though. I’m sure there’ll be something else that’ll be fun.”

The pair approached a shiny purple stand decorated with silver stars, manned by six happy boys in matching white button ups and black pants.

“Hello! We are Astro, the stargazing club here on campus,” advertised a beaming, squishy boy in a high-pitched tone. “Please, have a drink for free on us!” A handsome guy with an actor’s looks offered seven glass soda bottles to them, each filled with liquids that were an individual color of the rainbow. Jeno and Jaemin took a blue and aqua drink, respectively, giving their thanks to the Astro boys.

“They were so nice,” Jaemin said, taking a short sip. “Cute too, like me.” He tilted his head to the side like a puppy. That boy definitely knew he was adorable, but Jeno didn’t mind at all.

“Let’s keep looking.”

Before they could make it too far, they were stopped by a request to “STAN LOONA.” The boys turned to meet three girls dressed in uniform short skirts and ribbons tied around their shirt collars. A skinny platinum blonde wearing blue provided them both buttons reading the same phrase. “Stan LOONA,” she repeated cheerfully, walking off to greet other students with her friends at her side.

Jeno paused, a bit puzzled “Do you know what LOONA is?”

“Not really,” Jaemin responded. “But I’m interested in finding out.”

Lots of clubs seemed relatively intriguing, yet nothing really caught Jeno’s attention for too long. Eventually, they stumbled across a lime green booth with “NCT” spray-painted in a mildly sloppy manner over the front in black. Four boys sat at the table, each occupying a different level on the spectrum of bored to approachable. Jeno didn’t know if it was the imperfect display or the assortment of members, but he felt compelled to come closer.

“I want to see this.”

As the two boys drew nearer to the stand, a model-like member with dimples in his cheeks was half-jokingly scolding one of his peers. “Winwin, you have to stop looking at your Instagram right now. We’re trying to get people to come up to us.”

A brunette boy sitting on the opposite end of the table rolled his almond-shaped eyes and put down his phone. “That’s what I’m doing, Jaehyun. I was asking Mark which photo I should post on Instagram for welcome week.”

“Yeah, and I was just helping him out,” said what looked like the youngest of the group, presumably Mark.

“Everyone, look ready. Some people are coming up to us.” At once, all four shifted in their chairs towards Jeno and Jaemin, under the direction of who could only be their leader, a striking presence whose middle-parted hair was nearly long enough to cover his sharp black eyeliner. “Hello. My name is Lee Taeyong and we are apart of an all-male dance group here at Daehaekgyo called Neo Culture Technology,” he announced in a gentle voice, quite unlike his appearance. As a group, the seated members all performed a matching salute.

“We’re having auditions tomorrow at the Nu Chi Tau House,” continued Jaehyun, gesturing towards the sign-up sheet and bowl of pens next to Taeyong and Mark. “All you have to do is come at 7:00 pm, learn a dance, and we’ll see how well you do.”

Jeno considered their proposal. He had never been much of a dancer, but he thought this might be an opportunity to try something new. The four boys at the booth seemed surprisingly friendly, albeit a bit disorganized, for frat bros, so he wouldn’t mind spending more time with them. Not to mention that this could be something for him and Jaemin to do, together...

“Jaemin, ah.”

“Mhm?”

“Do you want to try out with me?”

Jaemin leaned against the table and proceeded to write down “Na Jaemin” before looking back at Jeno, handing him a pen. Their fingers touched lightly. It was short, but it encouraged Jeno to make his decision. Underneath the couple of names on the sheet, he signed up: “Lee Jeno.”

All of the NCT members let out a series of cheers.

“We’ll see you tomorrow night then,” promised Taeyong after this success. “Hopefully, you’ll both be new members of NCT!” This was met with greater excitement from the bros and new students alike. Jeno, himself, was looking forward to the audition too, especially since Jaemin would be by his side.

“I think we found the right club,” Jaemin said, looking directly into Jeno’s eyes.

Jeno couldn’t help but dream a little. It was 3:56. They’d spent over an hour together.  _ I guess time does go by quickly when you’re with someone you like _ . He didn’t want it to end just yet. 

“Jaemin-ah, would you like to go get som—”

Before Jeno could finish his sentence, Jaemin’s phone interrupted him with a  _ buzz _ . Jaemin checked his notifications, sighing.

“My RA just told us that we have a hall meeting at 4:30 that we _have_ to go to.” Jaemin hesitated at the last part of his sentence, looking for Jeno to change his mind.

“I guess you should go, then.” 

Just as the words left his mouth, Jeno knew that was the worst response he could have given, confirmed by the other boy’s gaze at the ground.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, right?”

Jeno nodded. “I’ll be there.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jeno's an oblivious lil' dummy :')—and so are y'all if you ain't listen to Astro or LOOΠΔ yet! Stan Astro. Stan LOOΠΔ. Buy, stream, and watch "Always You" and "Hi High" right now!  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> Also...who the fUCK is excited for NCT Dream "We Go Up?!"


	3. Crackheads

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jaemin ♡**

 

You know when you’re getting really into something (or someone) and it’s suddenly over earlier than you know it and it all feels way too soon? Jaemin was feeling exactly  _ that _ at this moment, after his day with Jeno was cut off by a hall meeting.  _ Out of all things _ . Normally, Jaemin wouldn’t consider skipping something like this, though he might have if Jeno had just given him a different answer _.  _ Walking back to Dansim, Jaemin spent probably a little too much time wondering why Jeno told him to go.  _ Did he decide I wasn’t worth spending any more time with? Was I too boring? Does he have better things to do?  _ Yes, Jaemin knew that Jeno would be at the NCT auditions tomorrow, but did he know that  _ for sure _ ? Jeno  _ did  _ promise... _ Ugh, I didn’t even get his number. Stupid.  _ As Jaemin arrived at his destination, he could only come up with a single conclusion:  _ It would’ve been easier if he just said he was in love with me. _

Jaemin’s room was on the first floor of Dansim Hall, which meant it was one flight of stairs from the main lobby, something that he was thankful for, following his round trip to central campus. He checked the text from his RA again to confirm he was headed in the right direction: “Hey, Petal House residents! Our floor meeting will be at 4:30 pm in the first floor common room. See you in a bit!—Johnny.” The message was nice enough. Still, Jaemin couldn’t help but be upset with Johnny for having this meeting right now.  _ Just get over yourself. There’s nothing you can do about it. _ He waited in silence outside of the room, checking his phone until it was exactly time to go in.

Upon entering, the room felt instantly inviting. On one side, beige couches covered in assorted throw pillows were arranged around a large television for the purpose of group viewings while fun things such as table tennis, an air hockey table, and vending machines occupied the opposite half. Square windows allowed outdoor views of the blossoming dansim flowers whose pink petals were the same shade as the lounge’s walls. Jaemin could see himself spending nights here with friends in the future.

“Take a seat anywhere that you’d like,” said a tall intimidating boy in a white t-shirt. Jaemin followed his instructions, choosing the lone empty sofa and plopped down next to a fluffy white pillow. Tall boy looked at his watch. “We’ll take about five minutes for some others to arrive.”  _ This must be Johnny _ . Jaemin sat by himself, trying not to notice the boys who had already came in with their roommates. Although he was an outgoing person, when Jaemin was alone, he was very quiet. And it looked like he’d be like this for the entire time.

As Johnny was about to begin the session, two more boys stepped in, attempting to be subtle but failing drastically. The first grinned awkwardly at the rest of the room, though the latter simply averted his eyes and pointed his friend towards Jaemin’s couch. Now that everyone seemed to be settled in, their RA introduced himself.

“Hello, everyone. My name is Johnny and I’ll be your RA for the 2018-2019 school year here at Daehaekgyo University. To get things going, let’s have every pair of roommates meet another two and then we can regroup and share our names and something about each other. Try it for hmm, six minutes.” He motioned once more to the room, indicating that the icebreaker activity was something that he actually wanted them to take part in.

Jaemin wasn’t particularly fond of icebreakers—not because he was shy, but he found them to be too forced. The boy next to him, on the other hand, seemed all for it. Before he opened his mouth, he flipped his hair, a cascade of light to dark brown waves, and rolled up the sleeves of his peachy top, exposing a pair of toned arms. 

“Yo, I’m Lucas,” he said in a deep voice. “What’s your name, baby?”

His friend, a wholesome-looking brunette wearing a half-buttoned grey shirt over a white tee, turned away in mild disapproval as he watched this happen. Jaemin didn’t know exactly how to respond either.

“My name is Jaemin,” he replied after a few moments, causing Lucas to bring his big hands to his face and start laughing, a loud, weird sound that was so strangely endearing that it caused the others beside him to react the same way.

Lucas put one hand to his heart and made a screeching noise. “AH, so cute, Jaemin!”

“Don’t mind him. He’s  _ always _ like this.” His friend extended a hand to Jaemin from the opposite side of the couch. “I’m Kun. It’s nice to meet you. Lucas and I live in room #17.”

“I love Fat Kun,” said the muscular boy, earning a light punch on the shoulder from his roommate. Jaemin could tell he already liked them, even if they hadn’t learned anything beyond one another’s names. He went back to the task at hand: fun facts.

“I’ll go first. I guess I tend to like things to be hotter than most people would. For example, I take really hot showers and sleep on a heated mattress. Maybe I’m a warmer person,” Jaemin said, chuckling. “What’s something people wouldn’t know about you?”

Lucas jumped right in, arms flexed. “I have too much muscle. Too big. Yeah, okay, good.”

“I really like doing magic tricks,” announced Kun to Lucas’s audible support.

“OH! YEAH! Fat Kun is so cool!”

“Can you please stop calling me that? You sound like a crackhead.”

“Hey,” Lucas began, louder than he realized, putting his arms around both Jaemin and Kun. “We’re all crackheads.” Everyone nearby, including Johnny, burst out laughing at his comment. Lucas was too charming for his own good.

With the boys from room #17 at Jaemin’s side, the remainder of the meeting went by fast as rules were explained alongside whispered jokes and not so hidden reactions. It felt fun, or at least, as fun as something like this could get. By the end, he’d nearly forgotten how he had to leave Jeno earlier at KCON until Johnny brought the subject up.

“I think if I have any advice for new students, it would be to put yourself out there and get involved with something on campus. Who here went to KCON today?” Johnny scanned the room. A few hands were raised. Eventually, he landed on Jaemin. “Jaemin. What’s one club that you thought might be worth joining?”

“Uh,” Jaemin stammered, playing with his jacket sleeves. “I think I’m gonna try out for this dance group called NCT.”

Johnny seemed pleased with his answer. “And that’s just one great student org that you could be apart of. I encourage all of you guys to try something new like that here at Daehaekgyo.” The RA looked at his watch. “Well, that’s pretty much everything that I had to say. Thanks for coming out today. If you ever have any questions, I’ll be in room #8...and if you have any questions later than one am, just ask a friend. Otherwise, have a great first year!”

“Ayyyyy,” shouted Lucas. “Let’s go to the dining hall!”

“Jaemin, you should come with us,” said Kun. “We can eat together.”

Jaemin perked up, nodding to the others. When the three of them nearly reached the door, Johnny called for Jaemin again. 

“Hey, Jaemin. I just wanted to talk to you for a second about auditioning for NCT. I’m actually one of the current members, so I wish you the best of luck for tomorrow. If there’s anything you want to know, I’d be happy to help.”

About to answer, Jaemin was overshadowed by Lucas, who declared, “Come on! Eat with us, Johnny. We can all talk when we get some food!”

Johnny stopped. He probably didn’t expect his residents would get along with him so soon, though it was apparent to Jaemin that he appreciated the invitation. Their RA wasn’t as scary as he looked. 

“Alright, let’s go.”

♡ ♡ ♡

To the gratitude of its residents, Dansim’s dining hall, was merely a short walk over from the main level of the housing complex. Like the surrounding residential area, its namesake variety of the mugunghwa grew in abundance around the perimeter, causing Daehaekgyo scholars to dub the building as “The Flower Box.” While it certainly was not the biggest or the newest dining hall on campus, its amenities were specific to Dansim, such as a teahouse and menus consisting mainly of...

“ _ Vegetarian _ food?” Lucas frowned, leaning towards Johnny. “That’s not all they have here, right?”

Their RA stifled his amusement. “Not at all.” He pulled out his student ID and handed it over to the greeter on duty. “But, you’re missing out if you don’t taste it.”

As he saw the inside of the Flower Box for the first time, Jaemin’s eyes expanded in size. Hungry students and busy employees in rosy uniforms were in constant motion, the sound of footsteps, utensils, and a faint upbeat playlist filling his ears. Lines formed at the right side of the dining hall, where food was served in pre-arranged portions, readily available for patrons to grab and go. Seating made up the rest of the facility, filling in the other two thirds of space, other than a serve-yourself salad bar positioned directly in the middle, and the tea bar, which occupied its own elevated section among the back wall alongside a few booths for a slightly more peaceful dining experience.

Bringing Jaemin back to reality, Johnny asked his younger company for their drink orders. “I’ve been coming here just about everyday for such a long time that the workers here reserved a spot for me up on that upper level,” he said, pointing to a booth on the far corner of the elevated seating. “Go crazy. Get yourselves some food. I’ll meet you there.”

Lucas got a head start on his friends. “I bet I can eat more than you guys!”

“I’m sure you could,” said Kun.

Being in the Flower Box felt to Jaemin like a limitless selection of things to try, ranging from kimchi and jajangmyeon to bulgogi and one of Jaemin’s personal favorites, honey tteokbokki. With a full plate in each hand, Jaemin wondered if he was getting too greedy until he noticed Kun and Lucas doing the same, except the latter was adding to the two servings he had put in his spot beforehand. Jaemin took a seat on the opposite side of the booth from his new friends, just breaking apart his chopsticks when Johnny arrived with their beverages: A green tea for Jaemin, milk for Kun, water for Lucas, and an iced black coffee for himself.

Once they made the initial dents in their meals, Jaemin decided he’d continue the conversation that he and Johnny were having prior to dinner.

“So, Johnny, why’d you join NCT?”

The older boy drank from his coffee. “A few of the bros have always liked to dance, but they formed the group because they wanted to be serious about performing. When I saw how good everyone actually was at dancing and how much fun it looked doing it together, I wanted to be apart of it too. There’s one, two, three...nine members right now,” he declared, counting the names in his head. “We’re all pretty different, but NCT tries to show what makes us one.”

Jaemin reflected on his experience at their KCON booth. “Yeah, I think I met a few of them. Does that mean you have to be a brother to be in?”

“Right now, Nu Chi Tau is kind of a fixed unit between the nine of us.” He glanced around the table. “Don’t ask me why. I don’t argue with it—it’s easier that way. But anyone can try out tomorrow!”

“Wait,” interjected Kun. “Does that mean we can audition if we didn’t sign up?”

Johnny’s face gave the answer away. “Of course! I can text Taeyong right now and let him know that we have another one coming.”

Kun nudged his roommate. “What about you, Lucas?” Jaemin, Kun, and Johnny eagerly awaited what the outspoken boy would say next. Running a hand through his hair multiple times, Lucas put on a show out of his internal thought process that was cut by a more forceful elbow from Kun.

“I’m in,” he said, slamming his fists in front of him. “Fighting haeyaDWAE!” All of the boys threw their heads back in their booth, clapping for his choice.

Johnny picked up the remaining contents of his drink. “Let’s make a toast then,” he proclaimed, urging the others to do the same with their glasses. “What should we toast to?”

Jaemin yelled instinctively, “To crackheads!”

“TO CRACKHEADS!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll say it now: "Boss" was the first NCT video I ever saw and I've been LucAss-biased ever since. Y'all ain't gonna ignore Kun or Johnny here though! Lemme know who your NCT bias is. ♡  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> To both those of you who have been waiting for updates and those of you who are reading Asadal for the first time, a bitch is letting y'all know that y'all have so much more content coming every week! Thank you always for all of the support ♡


	4. Singing in the Rain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jeno ♡**

 

Lee Jeno doesn’t always spend his mornings thinking about how grateful he is for a model penis, but when he does, he trips over his sleeping roommate’s legs and falls on the ground.

“Jisung,” said Jeno. “What are you doing on the floor?”

The younger boy sleepily ran his hands through his silvery bowl cut.

“It takes too long to get up and down from the top bunk,” he explained

The boys’ room at Baedal Hall was about double the size of a standard dorm, leading its inhabitants to figure out how to divide the space between them on their own. After multiple heated rounds of rock, paper, scissors, Jeno gained the single bed for himself while his roommates, Jisung and Renjun, shared the bunk bed that lay parallel to the length of the room. Tired sighs signaled that Jeno’s accident woke up Renjun as well, who now rolled away to the opposite side of the bottom bunk, still cradling his beloved Moomin plushie in his arms.

“What time is it?”

Jeno, answered him, fully alert. “7:02.”

In sync, his roommates grunted in discontent.

“It’s welcome week,” Renjun moaned, still in bed. “We don’t even have classes this early.”

Jisung echoed him. “Our NCT auditions aren’t until 7 _PM_. It’s not like you already have somewhere special to go right now.”

“Or _someone_ special to see,” added Renjun teasingly, now staring at Jeno.

Jeno shrugged off their comments. “Ah, you may be right. I wish I could be as lucky as Renjun who already found his someone special...Moomin,” he joked, earning him a chuckle from Jisung and a spare pillow thrown at him by Renjun. “Besides, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to make the most out of your day. Do you guys want to get breakfast?”

“How about lunch...or dinner,” Jisung whispered quietly, falling back asleep on the ground.

Renjun held his plushie tighter as he turned. “ _We’ll_ be here.”

♡ ♡ ♡

Counting down the hours until 7:00 took longer than Jeno anticipated. Since Baedal Hall and its pure white blooms were so close to central campus, he spent the day exploring Daehaekgyo, slowly finding his way around without assistance. By chance, his new roommates were also planning on trying out for NCT, being dedicated (and much more experienced) dancers themselves—Renjun practices ballet in addition to contemporary dance, whereas Jisung specializes in popping and locking. Although Jeno was looking forward to spending time with the both of them, potentially all as members of the group, his heart was set on seeing Jaemin again, fueling his daydreams. As he got lost passing by coffee shops, karaoke bars, and classy restaurants, Jeno found himself lost in love scenarios. Every place became a potential spot to take Jaemin on their first date, even though the two boys had met less than a day ago. His time at Daehaekgyo University had just begun and Jeno couldn’t look more forward to what would come next, starting with audi—

“HAPPY WELCOME WEEK!”

A confused-looking girl in all black crashed into Jeno, stumbling into his arms. She wore a thick choker attached to a harness around her midriff, complete with a strappy top and high-waisted shorts. It was clear that she was ready to go out. It was also very clear that she wasn’t ready to go anywhere by herself.

Jeno held her hands in order to help get her on her feet. “Are you okay?”

The girl whipped her high ponytail in his face, disoriented but grinning from side to side. “No, I’m JinSoul!” _She’s drunk_ . “I’m trying to find the other LOONA girls, but I don’t know where they went...not because I’m drunk or anything though.” _Ah, LOONA as in “Stan LOONA.” From KCON_ . Jeno checked the time. 6:31 pm. He had planned on arriving at auditions about 15 minutes early, as he did with all events, except he was certain that JinSoul would never find her friends without some help, considering her condition at 6:31. _At least, she’s having fun_.

“Hi, JinSoul. I’m Jeno. Do you know where you’re supposed to meet your friends at?”

She stopped, thinking intensely. “Eden! It’s this new club that just opened.”

“You’re going to the club at 6:30?”

“I have to help set up for our first recruitment party! I’m not good at being on time, so I wanted to get there as soon as I could. But I’m _not_ late this time! I’m just drunk!” She tapped a finger against her head twice, proud of her decision. “It must be close. I can’t really check though. I knew I shouldn’t have used Snapchat when my phone was at 10%!” JinSoul squatted over the sidewalk, this close to throwing her phone, if not for Jeno stopping her.

“Here, I’ll look it up on my phone.” Under “Eden,” the top result popped up: “ _North_ Campus? Who would go to a nightclub there?”

“No wonder Yves didn’t want to stay! To be honest, I don’t want to go either,” whined JinSoul. “I still don’t know why we let Olivia pick the venue.”

Jeno was torn. The Nu Chi Tau house was nearby on South Campus, with the rest of Greek Life. If he wanted to be on time, he’d have to help JinSoul make it to Eden quickly. _Try-outs probably won’t start right at 7 though_ . _I’m sure there’ll be introductions and forms to fill out. And I can’t just leave her here alone._ Lee Jeno hated being late, especially when it came to making important first impressions, but he also hated not doing the right thing.

“Why don’t we call a car to take you to Eden? I can pay for it.” He put in a request for JinSoul to be picked up from the café that he passed earlier and almost lost his mind at the price. _This is why nobody goes to North Campus_. “Okay, a driver is on their way to pick you up. Don’t worry about paying me back—consider it a welcome week present.”

Her eyes lit up. “You’re the best, Jimin!” She threw her arms around Jeno. “Wait. Did you do that?”

“Do what?”

A drop of water landed on Jeno’s face. Then another, and a few, and a lot. It was raining. Fast.

“Here, take this,” he said, extending his lilac windbreaker to JinSoul. “We have to run if we don’t want to get too wet.”

“Ugh, I already washed my hair this morning!”

Jeno took her hand and led the semi-coherent girl towards her pick-up location through the downpour. Puddles began to form underneath their shoes, causing water to splash around their ankles. The rain felt cold on Jeno’s arms without his jacket, but he knew JinSoul needed it more than he did at this point. Still, he could already feel his clothes clinging to his body. Luckily, D Store was only a few minutes of a walk towards central campus, a length made even shorter by the pair’s frantic sprint. _Perfect timing_. A bespectacled middle-aged man driving a red SUV approached the curb in front of them, narrowly rolling down his window as Jeno and JinSoul caught their breath.

“Is one of you JinSoul?”

The girl answered on time, except it wasn’t with a “yes.”

_Oh, shit._

“I’m sorry, kid” the driver apologized to Jeno. “But I’m not letting her get into my car like that.”

“Huh?”

The man didn’t give any time for discussion and sped away, leaving Jeno and JinSoul in the rain...and in her vomit.

“Asshole!” Jeno faced JinSoul, whose shorts were now stained. “Come on. We’ll clean you up first.” He took her clean, well, _cleaner_ hand, again and entered the leaf-covered café. Inside, Jeno couldn’t help but notice how cute the place was even with the crying emergency at his side. Walls alternated between white brick and warm tan, adorned by neon lights, such as letters spelling out “Dream Night” in the center of fresh greenery. _Jaemin would like it here_. Back on task, he brushed past waiters tending flowers and carrying soda and proceeded to the “Order Here” counter, where he slapped down some bills from his wallet.

“Hi, I would like a bottle of water, please. Could you point me to the bathroom?”

Stunned by his pace, the young white-haired worker directed him towards a hallway in the back and exchanged the money for his order.

“Thank you. The bathroom is over here, JinSoul. I’ll help you.”

They were just about to head in when the cashier called to them.

“Sir, you and her can’t be in there at the same time.”

Jeno had spent way too much time to leave JinSoul’s side now, opening the bathroom door.

“I’M GAY,” he shouted back.

The restroom had the same white bricks as the main café, with a single toilet and sink at the far wall, which JinSoul fled to. Holding her soaked hair back, Jeno offered her the water he just bought as he sat on the grey tiled floor next to her, drenched as well.

“Are you okay?”

Her breathing was heavy, but she managed to speak in short syllables. “Yeah. I’m so sorry, Jaebum.” _Not much closer than her last guess._ “I’m a mess.”

Jeno tried his best to comfort her. “No, you’re just fine.” He grabbed some paper towel and ran some cold water over it in the sink to dab on her shorts. “It’s Jeno, by the way.”

“Ugh.” JinSoul lifted her head from the toilet. “I can’t even get your name right.”

“Don’t worry about it. We’ll dry up and rest for a bit and we can figure out what to do.”

She sniffled, like she was beginning to cry. “You’re such a nice guy, Jeno. Anybody would be lucky to be with you.”

“Haha, you think so?”

JinSoul swallowed some water. “I do. And I’ll pay you back. Just one thing: put my number in your phone. And one thing, can you take a photo of us and send it to me in case I don’t remember what happened?”

“Yeah, sure,” he chuckled, under these circumstances.

“And just one more thing.”

She puked again as he pulled out his phone, scrolling through his contacts for the number that he saved the other day at KCON and started to type out a message:

_“Hey, Jaehyun. It’s Lee Jeno. I’m gonna be late.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fuck blue lives. JinSoul is skinny.  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> The "Dream Store" is definitely based on the set of Astro's "Baby" music video—one of my favorite videos of all-time. Not to mention, JinSoul's solo, "Singing in the Rain," is absolutely captivating. Y'all should stan!


	5. LET'S GET IT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jaemin ♡**

 

“Y’know, it’s uglier than I thought it would be,” Jaemin commented to his friends.

“At least you can recognize it,” suggested Kun, half-sarcastically.

The Nu Chi Tau house didn’t stand out from other fraternity houses in design, with tall columns supporting a pointed roof and the chapter’s respective Greek letters spelled across a wide balcony over the entrance. However, it was the building’s color that distinguished itself, an electric lime that made the nearby grass seem almost dull in comparison. Empty Soju bottles, red Solo cups, _(is that a used condom?)_ and general frat bro paraphernalia were spread across the lawn, the faint scent of alcohol permeating the air. They were _definitely_ in the right place. A noise from above welcomed the three of them.

“Hey, come in,” said a pretty, ashy-haired boy from the balcony. He wore the widest smile on his face that Jaemin had ever seen, yet he still seemed undoubtedly genuine. “I’m Yuta! The bros and I will meet you downstairs in the dance studio.”

“Alright,” yelled Lucas. “Let’s go!”

Led by Lucas, Jaemin and Kun descended a flight of stairs, chasing the sound of raucous college boys into what could only be the studio, a surprisingly spotless off-white room with one side covered completely in mirrors, for practice purposes. Zico blared from two speakers set on both ends of the back wall, where the brothers of NCT were gathered alongside aspiring auditionees, taking turns showing off their dance moves.

“Ay, Jaemin, you’re here,” greeted Mark with his signature endearingly dorky swag. “And you brought friends! I’m Mark.” One by one, he met each of them with a bro hug. “Where’s Jeno at?”

Jaemin could feel his heart drop, pointlessly scanning the room to confirm what Mark had already told him. _Jeno didn’t show up_. He tried his best not to let the disappointment show up on his face. “I don’t know. He said he was coming.”

“Maybe he’s just running late. The important thing is that you’re here,” Mark beamed, placing a hand on Jaemin’s shoulder. “We’re gonna have a lot of fun, I promise.”

“Mark!” A slim figure with raven hair walked up to them. “Did you remember to download the playlist for today?”

Mark chuckled. “Actually—”

The other boy’s eyes got stern. “I’ll do it myself. I don’t know why I expected you could do this when you can’t even make eggs the right way.”

“You know what, Doyoung?” Jaemin watched as Mark lunged at his laughing friend, attempting to strangle him.

“Ah, we’ll teach you how to cook soon, okay? Let’s finish setting up,” teased Doyoung, smiling at Jaemin and his friends. “Good luck. You’ll all do well.”

Thanking the brothers for the kind words, Jaemin couldn’t help but feel sad at Jeno’s absence. He continued to silently search the room with forced hope that he might’ve missed him, though he knew his efforts were to no avail. While he was grateful that he didn’t arrive alone—Lucas and Kun made excellent company—he had been looking forward to trying out with the boy he met yesterday. Still, it wasn’t like he didn’t want to make it into NCT without Jeno. _It just would’ve been nicer if we made it, together_. Evidently, Jaemin was unskilled at hiding his disheartenment when Lucas placed a comforting arm around the discouraged boy.

“Hey, what’s wrong, man?”

“I—,” stammered Jaemin. He already trusted his friends enough to tell them the truth, but he became embarrassed at the thought of himself worrying about a boy he would likely never see again. Luckily, Kun saved him from having to come up with a story.

“Are you nervous?”

“YES,” Jaemin answered, too eagerly to seem casual. “I mean, I’ve never danced in front of anyone else, y’know?” _Nice save, Jaemin_. If Kun and Lucas had any other questions about his reasons, they didn’t say anything though, much to Jaemin’s contentment.

“We got this,” encouraged Lucas, pounding a fist against his chest. “Fighting! Haeyadwae!”

Jaemin resisted the urge to laugh. Lucas always knew how to hype everyone up. Gradually, the conversations in the room came to a halt, combining into a uniform cheer when a familiar boy in dark eyeliner and a Balenciaga cap walked through the door. Joined by the other members already present, he counted down from three to signal the group’s salute.

“To the world, we are NCT!”

He adjusted his hat. “My name is Lee Taeyong and I am the leader of NCT. Thank you all so much for coming out to auditions today. We have an exciting routine to teach that we think you’ll enjoy.”

“Let’s show them a sneak peek,” said Yuta, now seated at a laptop at the front of the room. At his request, NCT got into formation, rocking back and forth to the reggae beat of EXO’s Ko Ko Bop. As Baekhyun sang the first line, the auditionees’ exhilaration was easily evident, transforming into sheer awe when the group synchronized their movements to the song’s famous beat drop. Every step was executed as one, yet each member never lost their individual personalities, all striking a different pose at the end of their performance to the sound of hands clapping.

Mark stopped to catch his breath. “I think you guys might’ve heard this song before.”

“What we will be teaching you today is the choreography to the chorus _and_ the drop of Ko Ko Bop,” Taeyong explained. “But don’t be worried. We will assign everybody an NCT member to follow, so they can help you if you get lost. When you’re done learning, you’ll have some time to practice with your partner before all the auditionees will perform together.”

A calm voice chimed in. “And then we will record you all by yourself to decide if you can join or not.”

“Taeil,” Winwin whined, looking at the boy who just spoke. “You can’t say that.”

“But they look so cute when they’re nervous! Like you,” remarked Taeil, practically manhandling Winwin to give him a hug despite his immense resistance.

Doyoung pulled Taeil off of his victim. “Hey, stop flirting in front of the kids!”

“That’s _not_ what we were doing,” objected Winwin.

“ _Anyway_ ,” Taeyong transitioned. “We’re going to start pairing everyone off. Kun and Johnny will be partners, Lucas with Winwin, Chenle and Jaehyun, Renjun and Taeil, Jaemin and Mark.”

Jaemin’s ears perked up as he locked eyes with Mark, who made his way over to the younger boy and hi-fived him.

“I told you we were going to have fun, Jaemin!”

 _Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad, after all_. “Guess I got lucky.”

As Taeyong had nearly finished assigning parts to the group, Jaemin overheard Jaehyun whisper something into his leader’s ear. Although his attention was elsewhere after being partnered up with Mark, he latched onto the phrase “be late” with his full being. Without any hesitation or second thoughts, the faith he had just lost returned to his body. _Is Jeno coming?_

“What we can do then is put Jungwoo with Doyoung. and have Jisung and Haechan be together,” continued Jaehyun, to Taeyong’s approval.

“So, if he’s on his way, I can partner up with—”

Suddenly, the door burst open along with Jaemin’s heart as a thin beautiful boy wearing round glasses strolled in, carrying himself in an effortlessly graceful way. Slim fingers took their time bringing a straw to his lips prior to verbally announcing his arrival. With one hand holding his drink and the other tousling grey strands of hair, he spoke in a fittingly high-pitched way that exuded playful confidence. “Am I late?”

“Maybe you wouldn’t be if you didn’t stop for this,” scolded Taeyong, examining the boy’s cup. “What’s this?”

Ten sat on top of the table Yuta was seated at and moved his drink towards his friend standing over him. “Green tea latté.”

Taeyong swallowed. “Ah, now I’m in the mood for something sweet.”

“Well, I’m sweet, so you don’t have to worry about that.”

Jaemin and Mark exchanged looks as Taeyong giggled awkwardly.

“Taeyong is gonna help you learn the dance to Ko Ko Bop for auditions today,” said Johnny.

Ten stopped swirling his straw. “Wait, you guys are serious? I actually have to _audition_? I thought I just had to show up.”

“It’s been a long time since you participated in any NCT activities, Ten,” Jaehyun clarified, dimples appearing. “And that was only one time too.”

“I get no credit for helping to start this group.” The brown-haired boy jumped down from the table. “You’re lucky I stretched today.”

♡ ♡ ♡

“Take a water break, everyone. You’ve all worked hard,” Taeyong encouraged, reaching for his own bottle. “When you get back, you’ll have fifteen minutes to practice in pairs before you’ll dance altogether and the audition process will begin. We look forward to seeing it. Fighting!”

“Thank you,” gasped the auditionees in winded unison, Jaemin included. Learning the dance to EXO’s famous song wasn’t as difficult as he had originally anticipated, though the beads of sweat forming on his body said otherwise. Breathless, he went to the drinking fountain in the hallway to replenish his stamina. Immediately, the sensation of cold water energized him. Jaemin carefully splashed some onto his forehead, getting rid of the excess moisture as he bent down to take another sip.

“Aren’t you warm underneath that?” Mark’s presence drew the tired boy up from his break.

“A little bit,” Jaemin smiled, letting the sleeves of his pink track jacket fall down to his elbows. “I thought it might help me stand out.”

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that. You look good out there—and that’s not just because you’re with me.”

“I think only the first part of that is true.”

“Hey, remember, I get to decide if you can join or not,” joked Mark. “You better get back to work if you want to impress us.”

Jaemin laughed in a pointedly fake manner, rapidly returning to his normal light hearted expression. “I won’t disappoint.”

While there was no doubt that Mark’s fun-loving personality was infectious to those around him, the older boy was also an excellent teacher when it came to choreography. To his own credit, Jaemin was a model student, simultaneously adapting his partner’s tips into his movements and adding his personal charm to the routine. In spite of their varying levels of experience, the two boys worked naturally together like they’d known each other for much longer than a day. By the time that the auditionees got into formation, Jaemin’s nervousness became slowly replaced by determination to demonstrate his skills.

Out of the eight of them performing, Jaemin met his friends, Kun and Lucas, in the back row along with Jungwoo, an innocent-looking boy who seemed like he might throw up at any second. Chenle, Jisung, Renjun, and Ten made up the front, though it wasn’t yet clear to Jaemin if they chose to be there out of confidence or coincidence. Each hopeful member exhibited their anticipation differently—Lucas flexed his arms behind his head _(of course)_ to pump himself up, Kun silently ran through the motions by himself, and Jaemin checked his reflection in his phone camera—but they were all, more or less, ready to show what they’ve learned to their audience of existing NCT members.

“Let’s get it,” Mark yelled.

“L e t ‘s  g e t i t,” repeated Jungwoo delicately, as if in lowercase letters.

All of NCT rallied them to start. “LET’S GET IT!”

At the sound of Chen’s “It goes down, down, baby,” the auditionees instinctively leaped into their starting position, moving rhythmically with the lyrics as a unit. In Jaemin’s head, the chorus was all about showing off laid-back swagger as opposed to the knife-like precision of the breakdown. Still, he reminded himself to channel his energy throughout the performance, not only into each step, but onto his face as well. Provided with a mere portion of the song for the audition, every second counted. When Kai signaled the drop, Jaemin’s senses blurred into a series of ringing noises and whirling arms. Muscle memory filled in the gaps where his mind didn’t seem to process what came next until it was all over. Whereas learning the routine involved a lengthy series of repetition, the actual performance didn’t last more than thirty seconds, ending with a collective exhale from the dancers and enthusiasm from their viewers.

“Wow, you’re all so talented,” exclaimed Doyoung. “I’m so proud.”

“You did well,” said Taeyong. “Before we move on to the next step of the audition, I want to say that there is a lot of potential in this room. Right now, we don’t know how many new members we’ll take, but know that everyone here deserves a spot.”

Yuta nodded. “Even if you don’t make it this year, don’t give up and try again. Fighting!”

Once again, NCT presented those who performed with a round of applause for their hard work. For a moment, relief washed over Jaemin, though it was cut off right away by Jaehyun’s next question:

“Now, who wants to go first?”

Jaemin averted his gaze from the members towards the boys trying out with him, hoping for a miracle where someone else would volunteer. Jungwoo looked like he might cry. Kun was still. Even _Lucas_ was silent for once, hands clasped in front of him. Jaemin wasn’t dreading his audition; he was just dreading having to audition _first_. About to mentally prepare himself for the worst, a light voice rescued the other seven.

“I can,” Ten announced, walking boldly to the center of the room. “Where do you want me to stand?”

“Right there is perfect, Ten,” declared Johnny. “The camera is ready when you are.”

“You’re filming me for later?”

The group’s leader cleared his throat abruptly. “No, Ten. Not like _that_. Since we just saw you perform in a group setting, we want to evaluate each of you doing the same routine on your own in order to compare.”

“ _Right_.” The boy stretched out that one syllable for emphasis.

Jaehyun smirked slightly as Doyoung shook his head.

“Just dance already,” sighed the latter.

“I hope you’ll enjoy.”

Now gathered behind the camera with NCT, Jaemin and the rest of the boys awaiting their turn had their sights locked on Ten, watching to see how well he’d do. When Yuta pressed play, Ten had completely embodied the song in that single moment, proceeding to hit every beat with ease. The motions that everyone had just practiced seemed stronger, more alive, and completely his own, aided by matching facial expressions that were dripping in charisma. Above simply being a talented dancer, Ten was a performer, making the practice room his stage with just his undeniable presence. His brown eyes radiated the same intensity, even up to his final pose: a hand raised in front of his face as if to block an invisible sun.

Ten took a bow, his stare melting back into the same playfulness that he carried upon walking into the room. “Did I do alright?”

“You’re...OK,”said Taeil, winning the room’s laughter.

At this point, Jaemin didn’t know if it’d be better to be before or after Ten. With one option left, however, he did not want to know the answer to that.

“I would hate to be whoever is going next,” he said aloud to Mark, a grin creeping across his partner’s cheeks.

The answer came sooner than he expected.

“Jaemin wants to try!”

 _Damn it, Mark_.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♡ I love Marker Leech ♡


	6. Fingertips

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jeno ♡**

 

On the evening of the retreat, as Jeno sat in the passenger seat of Jaehyun’s car, he thought about reopening Taeyong’s email to make sure that it wasn’t a mistake. Since receiving his decision yesterday, he had glanced over it numerous times, yet the idea seemed nothing short of surreal. Tonight would mark Jeno’s first time as something more than just a student at Daehaekgyo. He wondered about the countless hours he’d spend in the dance studio and wondered even more about the countless memories that he’d share with NCT. _Maybe just one more look_ :

 

Lee Taeyong

NCT Audition Decision

To: Lee Jeno

Cc: Jung Jaehyun & 7 more

 

Dear Lee Jeno,

First and foremost, it is with great pleasure that we formally extend an invitation to you to be apart of **Neo Culture Technology 2018-2019**!

After careful examination of your audition and application, we are very excited to offer you a position as a new member of NCT due to your outstanding level of talent, energy, and passion. We know that you will do amazing things and we all look forward to having you with us this year.

We hope that you will consider this position and help us push NCT to become the best that it can be. Please respond as soon as possible with your decision by **tonight (Friday, August 31st) at 11:59 PM**.

 _And_...as a way to further welcome you into NCT, our annual group bonding retreat will begin this upcoming **Saturday night (September 1st) until midday Sunday (September 2nd)**. A follow-up email with some more details will be sent by Saturday morning in order to arrange transportation. If your decision is (hopefully) yes, please also fill out this **form** by **tonight (Friday, August 31st) at 11:59 PM**.

Our first practice will be the day classes begin ( **Tuesday, September 4th** ) at **8:00 PM** at the Nu Chi Tau house. Weekly rehearsals will be on Tuesdays and Thursdays at the house, but will be scheduled more frequently leading up to the week of performance dates. As a member, you are **REQUIRED** to attend every practice unless special circumstances arise or have otherwise already been discussed. If you have any prior commitments that restrict you from being in attendance, do inform us as soon as possible via email.

In case you have any questions or concerns, please do not hesitate to let us know. Once again, congratulations! From all of us, welcome to NCT!

 

Your leader,

Lee Taeyong

 

Lee Taeyong: [ tytrack@dhkyo.edu ](mailto:tytrack@dhkyo.edu)

Jung Jaehyun: [ jungjeffrey@dhkyo.edu ](mailto:jungjeffrey@dhkyo.edu)

♡ ♡ ♡

“Are you excited?”

Jeno looked up from his phone in a daze at their driver. “Huh?”

“I asked if you were excited,” repeated Jaehyun. “It seems like you have a lot on your mind.”

“I don’t think it’s hit me yet that I’m here,” the younger boy replied, putting the email away.

“Here as in Daehaekgyo or in this car?”

“Haha, I guess a little bit of both.”

“Ah, I see.” Jaehyun’s eyes were on the road, but Jeno could tell he was listening to every word. “It’s natural to feel that way, especially since it’s your first week. But you’re here right now because you have so much potential—that goes for all of you,” he said, addressing Jeno, as well as Renjun and Jisung in the backseat. “I know getting used to such a new place is really hard, especially by yourself, so it’s nice that you guys are getting involved and meeting new people so quickly. My hope is that NCT will help make the transition to Daehaekgyo not only easier, but also truly enjoyable, starting with tonight.”

“I hope so too.”

The sun began to set while they drove, passing by buildings that Jeno had never seen until they were far off-campus. Steadily, daylight gave way to nightfall with lamp posts and stars alike illuminating the city. About half an hour had gone by when Jaehyun announced they’d made it at their destination, a luxurious apartment building that stretched six stories high.

“No way,” gasped Jisung, his eyes scaling the metal gate outside. “We’re not breaking in to somebody’s house, are we?”

“Not quite,” answered someone on the other side, breaking into loud dolphin-like laughter. A youthful figure emerged from the darkness, taking the form of a kind-faced boy in an oversized neon green tee and black sweatpants who opened up the entrance for them. “Hello, I’m Chenle! Welcome to my home.”

“Chenle’s one of our new members,” said Jaehyun. “We were going to have the retreat at the Nu Chi Tau house, but he offered to invite all of us here instead.”

Chenle nodded. “Follow me! My apartment’s the first one.”

As they were told, the Baedal Hall boys walked behind Jaehyun and their host through a private forest as if stepping into Chenle’s house was another world entirely. All around the paved path, tall bamboo trees brushed the night sky above them. In between introductions, Chenle explained that there was a nearby tennis court further down as well, with the same ease that one might use to direct someone to the bathroom, though there was no trace of pretension in his voice. Looking at Chenle, he couldn’t be any older than Jeno, but it’d be difficult to guess that either lived anything more than a humble life.

“The apartment and pool are right over here,” directed Chenle. Surely enough, once they exited the forest, a rectangular swimming pool came into sight, lined with lush vegetation ranging from manicured hedge rows that blended into dense, leafy plants as well as a flowery garden on the side from which they came. The teal water glittered alluringly, tempting Jeno to descend the ladder and swim. Closer to the apartment itself was a neatly-trimmed lawn that extended towards the front door, where their guide led them to now.

“AYYYYY,” greeted Mark, at full volume. “EVERYONE’S HERE!”

Inside, the living room was packed with old and new members who crammed as many of themselves as they could onto three sofas. Despite filling every couch from armrest to armrest, some boys still had to find a spot on the floor alongside their bags. Loud “yooooo”s, “what’s up”s, and other indiscernible college bro sound effects welcomed the final arrivals, urging them to make themselves comfortable. Jeno counted four members in his head when he completely lost track.

Across the room from him sat Jaemin, dressed in a collared satin shirt that was the shade of blush. His hair was almost fully away from his face, other than two symmetrical pieces that fell over the ends of his eyebrows, making him look more mature than when Jeno had last seen him. What didn’t change was the way he smiled, a sight that made Jeno realize that his feelings for him weren’t the same anymore.

They were growing.

Their eyes met, neither of them able to hide their shock while Taeyong stood up to address the room.

“Hello, everybody. Now that we’re all here, I want to make some quick announcements before we begin,” said Taeyong, motioning to Chenle to join him. “First of all, I’d like for us to give thanks to Chenle for joining NCT and for allowing us to stay at this beautiful home. Though he has already impressed us with his talent, he has went beyond that in hosting tonight, so both him and his home are to be treated with the utmost of respect.”

“Give him a hand,” shouted Johnny.

“Secondly, if you look around, you’ll realize that this year, NCT has accepted every single auditionee, not out of necessity and certainly not due to pity, but because we see potential in each of you to help define what NCT is. We’re all different from one another. Through our performances, however, we learn that we think, feel, and experience the same things, which is why NCT 2018 is an 18-member group and all of us should be proud to spread our message!” The boys erupted into cheers again at their leader’s motivational words. “More on that note, there’s one new member that wasn’t at auditions with the rest of us the other day who needs to introduce himself. Let’s welcome Lee Jeno!”

All heads turned to Jeno, whose focus kept returning to Jaemin.”Ah, hello, everyone. I’m Lee Jeno. I’m sorry I couldn’t meet you at auditions, but I can’t wait to get to know everybody better and dance with you in the future!” Jaehyun swung an arm around him as the other members applauded.

“And with that said,” Taeyong continued, “enjoy yourselves!”

“And _please_ , make good choices,” added Doyoung, who was blatantly ignored by Mark.

“SHOTS!”

“YEAH!”

Nearly all of the Nu Chi Tau bros and the older new members headed to the dining room, where Mark poured them round after round of grapefruit soju as if they needed something to further loosen up. Glasses clinked against each other in harmony while the younger boys in the living room prepared to make use of the pool outside.

“Jeno,” called Renjun, ascending the stairs. “Do you want to go swimming with us?”

“You guys get a head start,” he said casually as his roommates went to change. “I’ll meet you there soon.” That was a lie.

Jeno’s heart moved himself towards Jaemin before he could think otherwise. Now sitting two feet away from him was the boy he thought he’d never see again, yet the right words to say were stuck in his throat.

Jaemin spoke first, staring down at his shoes. “I didn’t think you were going to be here.”

“Me either.”

“I’m happy you are.” He shyly looked up at Jeno for the first time since the group split up, the corners of his lips forming into a slight smile.

It took all Jeno had to maintain his composure. “Me too.” _Can’t you say anything more than two words?_ “I—”

“Where did you go during auditions?’

“Ah, I was going to be there early and then—”

Abruptly, “Red Flavor” interrupted them from a speaker outside, providing somehow perfect music **f** or downing more alcohol but less than ideal background noise for the two boys’ reunion. Mark was unsurprisingly tipsy, starting to spill onto the table while a tall boy grabbed the bottle from his hands and started singing “BLEHBLEHBLEH” into it with the confidence of a less than coherent individual. Even their leader was laughing into Jaehyun’s chest, though Jeno couldn’t recall seeing him drink that much at all.

“I JUST WANT SOME MILK,” yelled Jaehyun, above the mindless noise.

There was no way that Jeno could catch up with Jaemin here.

“Do you want to go somewhere else?”

Jaemin nodded in agreement. “Lead the way.”

Both his own and Jaemin’s bags in hand, Jeno took Jaemin through the way that he entered, making sure that no one saw them leave. He wanted them to be alone, at least for a little bit. Overhead, the bamboo trees were vaguely familiar, however, their destination would have to be found without either boy ever personally being there. Step by step, as they followed the path downwards, Red Velvet faded away along with the sounds of the party. It was just the two of them.

“I think we’re almost there,” said Jeno, obviously not certain.

“Have you ever been there?”

“No...but I can feel that we’re close.”

Jaemin laughed, a sweet sound that made Jeno feel warm inside. He didn’t personally consider himself to be very funny, so Jaemin’s reaction felt like an unspoken compliment. It gave him more confidence.

“This is it.”

A full size tennis court appeared, sparsely lit by two lamp posts beside the roofed entryway. Two green rectangles comprised the area, with a barely brighter shade occupying the space where players would take their positions. Jeno silently thanked himself for paying attention to Chenle earlier once he and Jaemin approached the net.

Unzipping his duffel bag, Jeno delicately laid the navy blanket he brought onto the ground, spreading the corners out until they were flat. Without being told, Jaemin unfolded his own blanket underneath Jeno’s in order to give them enough space to lay down together in comfort.

“It’s nice outside,” said Jaemin. His eyes lit up, but his arms were crossed.

“Take this,” Jeno replied. “You look cold.” He took his denim jacket off and covered Jaemin’s shoulders, leaving himself in a mustard-colored knit sweater. Even though the night was cool, with Jaemin next to him, he didn’t mind anything else.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

Jaemin rolled onto his side, one arm over the other under his face like he was going to sleep. “Are you going to tell me your story now?” _He’s adorable_.

“Yes, of course. So, on the day of the auditions, I decided to explore campus a little bit before I went to the house. Wait,” he stopped. “Do you remember those ‘STAN LOONA’ girls from KCON?”

“Did you run into them again?”

“To be honest, she ran into me.”

Jeno went on to tell Jaemin about how he got to know JinSoul better and ended up being _very_ late to auditions, not sparing him the details of exactly what happened.

“She threw up in the rain?”

“That was the first time. When we went into the bathroom, it took her a few more tries to get everything out,” Jeno responded, amused by Jaemin’s shocked expression. “Aside from that, the café was really cute. I think you’d like it.”

“I’d love to check it out.”

“Maybe we can go sometime.”

Even in the nighttime, Jaemin couldn’t keep from smiling. “How’d you get to auditions then?”

“Well, after JinSoul finished cleaning up, the cashier, Sanha, let us borrow a phone charger and she called one of her sisters on North Campus to pick her up. I didn’t want to leave her alone, so I waited with her there and we ended up talking a lot. She’s actually very sweet.” Jeno took a break from his account and checked on his companion, who encouraged him to keep going. “It finished raining a lot when her friend came, but I was already so late that tryouts were done when I got to Nu Chi Tau. Luckily, I texted Jaehyun earlier about it and he taught me the routine that night and showed my recording to the other bros himself. He’s probably the reason why I’m here.”

“I guess I should thank Jaehyun then.”

It amazed Jeno how Jaemin always made him wonder—wonder about everything. He wished he was more like that. He wished he wasn’t so nervous around him. He wished he could be braver. For awhile, they laid down in silence, neither of them knowing exactly what to say next. Gazing at the stars, Jeno longed so badly to say _something_ to Jaemin that would let him know the way that he felt about him—he _needed_ to say something.

“Jaemin-ah...I really wanted to see you again.”

This time, it was Jaemin’s turn to be flustered. The faintest tint of pink spread over his cheeks, making them look similar to the shade of his shirt, while he struggled to make eye contact with the boy laying across from him. A lot sooner than he had planned for, the quiet returned, seeming more uneasy than it was a few seconds ago. With each soundless moment that passed by, Jeno regretted what he had told Jaemin at that point, but it didn’t change his feelings for him at all.

“I like it when you call me that,” Jaemin said, finally.

Jeno’s heart beat faster and faster the longer they stayed there. His hands reached out towards him while Jaemin did the same, moving closer together until they touched. Their fingers found their place as they interlocked. Jaemin’s hand felt warm and soft and pure against his; his fingertips held onto him gently yet tightly like he was something precious that he wanted to keep close. Two sets of brown eyes looked up and found each other in the darkness, both near but far away from the other boys at the same time.

“Jaemin-ah.”

“Mhm?”

“I don’t want to go back yet.”

The way Jaemin’s thumb lightly brushed against his own gave Jeno his answer. All at once, his nerves disappeared, even if just for now. Underneath the stars, Jeno thought about his first week at Daehaekgyo. He found out what it’s like to be embarrassed in front of an entire lecture hall. He found out how to take care of a drunk sorority girl by himself. He found out about auditions for a dance group that he was now proud to be apart of.

And he found out about a boy that he wanted to be with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long-awaited Nomin fluff. ♡


	7. Any Other Questions?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jaemin ♡**

 

“SHIT,” stumbled someone behind Jaemin as a cup fell to the floor, spilling hot coffee in all directions.

 _Maybe the first day of classes could be worse_.

“I’ll go get some paper towel,” said Jaemin, on his way to the nearest men’s restroom. Upon his return, the man was kneeling down, eyes opened comically wide above a long nose. He looked too old to be a student, but not quite mature enough to be someone’s dad. His hair was dyed a dusty-rose hue that contrasted his business casual outfit: a light blue band-collared shirt with black slacks.

“That was embarrassing,” the man replied, putting his hands over his face. Despite his clumsiness, you couldn’t resist rooting for him. “Thank you so much for your help.” He smiled at Jaemin as he started to clean his mess.

“Of course.”

“I just... _really_ wanted to drink that,” he sighed. Jaemin wanted to laugh, not out of pity or malice, just because his facial expressions were so _funny_. He extended a hand to Jaemin. “I’m Jisung!”

“Jaemin.”

The two of them shook hands once they stood up. Beneath their feet, the floor felt sticky from Jisung’s accident, though they managed to wipe up the coffee itself.

“Where are you headed to right now, Jaemin? The least I could do is guide you to where you’re going.”

“Writing 101 with Professor J. Yoon,” he began, checking the schedule on his phone, “In, uhh...3891 Gongchaek Hall.”

Somehow, Jisung managed to be shocked for a third time since he met Jaemin. “I know just the way!” He pointed to elevator beside them. “Is this your first class today?

“It’s my first class at Daehaekgyo.”

“Mine too,” he said enthusiastically. Jaemin thought to ask him about what exactly that entailed, but decided against it when they reached the writing department on the Cube’s third floor. “It’ll be right over here.”

3891 Gongchaek Hall was a small classroom, especially in comparison to the lecture hall in which he and Jeno attended their sex-education seminar. Three rectangular wooden tables arranged side-to-side took up the majority of space, with white rolling chairs circling the perimeter. On the farthest wall from the door, a blackboard hung underneath a projector screen. While Jaemin seated himself at the table closest to the board, facing the windows, Jisung moved past him towards the lectern in the corner, setting down his leather messenger bag.

“Are you in this class too, Jisung?”

He laughed as he answered, “I am.”

When the clock hit 10, Jisung grabbed a piece of chalk and wrote on the board: “Writing 101: Coming of Age throughout the Ages.” _Wait, Professor J. Yoon...as in—_

“Good morning, my name is Professor Yoon, but you may call me Jisung. Welcome to Writing 101.”

_Professor?_

Looking at his classmates, Jaemin could tell that they had the same reaction to his revelation. _There’s no way_.

“I thought you said it was your first class at Daehaekgyo,” blurted Jaemin.

“It’s my first class that I’m _teaching_ ,” Jisung clarified, obviously satisfied with the class’s response. “You’ll have to go easy on me. I’ll do my best to make this a great first semester for all of us.”

Just then, the door creaked open very subtly, although it wasn’t quite subtle enough to go unnoticed. A recognizably playful face peeked in, holding yet another iced green tea latté in one hand as he surveyed the inside.

“Nice,” whispered Ten to himself. “The professor isn’t here yet.”

Jisung waved. “ _Actually_ , I’m over here.”

Ten’s expression shifted into one of amused disbelief when he made eye contact with Jaemin, who calmly gestured to the name on the board. Recovering, he smiled at Jisung, charming as ever, “I’m so sorry I’m late, uh, Professor Yoon, I wanted to get you something for the first day of school.” He presented his drink of choice to their teacher, turning the cup to show his name written in marker.

“I’ll take it, Ten,” he replied, not needing an impressive reason to replace his spilled coffee. “‘Jisung’ will do just fine. Sit anywhere you’d like.”

As Jisung went around, personally handing each student a stapled copy of the course syllabus, Ten took a seat next to his fellow NCT member.

“I didn’t think I’d know anyone here,” said Jaemin.

Ten angled his chair towards him. “Now, you won’t even have to wait until tonight to see me.”

“Speaking of practice, a few guys and I are getting something to eat afterwards, if you wanna come with us.”

“Who’s all gonna be there?”

“Kun, Lucas, Mark, Jaehyun, me, _Jeno_.” Jaemin was well-aware of the emphasis he put at the end of his list, yet he didn’t mind. Saying Jeno’s name aloud made him happy.

“Sounds fun,” Ten answered. “It seems like you got closer to some boys during the retreat—”

“Jaemin. Ten,” called Jisung, in between thirsty sips, “Do you have any questions about the class?”

The older boy didn’t waste any time thinking. “If this is your first year of teaching, how old are you?”

Jisung could only laugh. “After studying for four years here at Daehaekgyo, I did two more and graduated last year with my master’s degree. I know 28 is a little young, but I _promise_ that I was officially hired by the university to come back as a professor. Any other questions?”  
“Just one more,” said Ten. “Are you single?”

Neither Jaemin, the other students, and especially not Jisung, knew how to respond other than to bust out laughing, eagerly chanting for their flustered professor to respond.

“Well,” Jisung managed, shaking off his embarrassment, “Since there are _no_ other questions, why don’t we begin?”

 _Yup, this is gonna be my favorite class_.

♡ ♡ ♡

“Call it a night, everyone,” said Taeyong proudly. “We’ll continue learning the set on Thursday. It’s our biggest performance of the fall semester, so we have to make sure that we prepare a memorable stage that showcases NCT. From what I’ve seen tonight, this will be our best year yet.”

“October will be here before you know it, so keep up the good work,” Doyoung added.

Their leader counted them down. “1, 2, 3!”

“To the world, we are NCT!”

“FRIED CHICKEN,” screamed Lucas, catching Jaemin and Kun in a running embrace after the members broke up for the day.

“LET’S GET IT!”

Jaemin didn’t even have to look to know that Mark was nearby—He was already so used to the way that he talked.

“Jaemin-ah.”

He wasn’t sure if he’d ever get used to hearing how Jeno said _that_.

Even though Jeno was wearing a hoodie, divided into red, blue, and yellow sections, he managed to look cuter every time that Jaemin saw him. Jaemin tucked his arms into his own white sweatshirt pocket, thinking about how the other boy’s hand had felt in his that night. He wanted it to happen again.

“Are you ready to go, Jeno?”

His eyes smiled along with his lips. “I am if you are.”

“Trust me, it’s the best chicken that I’ve ever had in my life,” said Jaehyun, approaching the rest of the group. “I’ll lead the way.”

Ten laid his head on Jaehyun’s shoulder. “I don’t mind that idea at all.”

Outside, students bustled about, fueled by the excitement of their first day. Amidst the noise and lights and nightlife, campus seemed never-ending. Each step that Jaemin took promised something new; it made him both nervous and exhilarated.

“Oh, yeah,” moaned Lucas, closing his eyes in pleasure.

The scent of chicken from the restaurant was intoxicatingly savory, striking the perfect balance between knowing you shouldn’t, but deciding to treat yourself anyway. If the smell alone wasn’t enough to convince broke college students to open up their wallets, the storefront definitely warranted a closer look. Baby pink walls made up the entire building, accented by clean hot pink trim. On the right side, two square windows displayed the eatery’s popularity, while an arched glass door invited the boys in at the left. Overhead, string lights hung underneath a vertical-striped awning that stretched from one end to the other in shades of bubblegum and white. “Ann-Yum!” was written in black bubbly font on top of the entrance. It was honestly _ridiculous_ how cute it was.

Kun looked over at their guide. “Are you sure this is it?”

“I wouldn’t lie to you,” Jaehyun answered. “Come on! Let’s eat!”

Inside, the decor did not betray the exterior. Polka-dotted wallpaper covered every inch of the interior, further adorned with various decals of light blue and yellow hearts and cartoons of food. A young, small-faced waiter, clad in uniform pastel from head to toe, took the boys to their spot, an arrangement of matching bow-shaped booths separated by a light wooden table, where their group split off by year. Even the music was somehow matching as GOT7 told the customers that they’re “Just Right” from the restaurant’s speakers.

“Don’t you dare start freestyling when we’re about to order, Mark Lee,” said Ten.

“Let me sit down for _one_ second,” Mark pouted. Jaemin could see why the older members liked teasing Mark so much—he took it all in stride. “Ooh, can we get those little hats?”

Maybe Mark brought it on himself too.

Jaehyun returned with five white paper versions of the pink pillbox hat that their server wore. “One for all of the rookies... _and_ one for Mark,” he proudly announced, placing it atop his head. “You guys should get a picture to remember your first day of class. Here, I’ll take it.”

“LET’S GET IT,” yelled Lucas, much to Mark’s satisfaction.

Putting on their new hats, the four new students moved towards each other in their booth. At one end, Jaemin felt Jeno’s arm bring him closer. Regardless of the situation, Jaemin’s heart fluttered at the hand on his shoulder. The smile forming on his face now was completely unforced.

Soon, their food came, smelling even better up close than it did outside. Jaehyun had ordered a feast of his favorites to celebrate the day’s successes. Together, they shared two large platters of crispy fried chicken, with the choice of soy garlic or spicy chicken, alongside what seemed like endlessly indulgent portions of kimchi fries, golden takoyaki, watermelon bubble teas (per Mark’s request), and of course, shots of soju.

“SO GOOD,” said Lucas, with food filling his cheeks. When he finished chewing most of what was left in his mouth, he tilted his head to the sky and proclaimed, “FRIED CHICKEN!” HE continued doing this with each dish he tried, yet he never failed to make his other members laugh while doing so.

In the process, Jaemin leaned back against Jeno beside him, happy eyes looking up into his. Reaching with his free hand behind Jaemin’s head, the older boy played with his hair, fingers pulling gently at the ends of short strands. It was all the encouragement that Jaemin needed.

“Jeno,” Jaemin whispered sweetly. “Do you want to come over on Friday night? I think I was gonna hang out with Lucas and Kun, but it might be fun if you wanted to spend the night too.”   

That heart-fluttering feeling came back.

“I can’t wait, Jaemin-ah.”

Daehaekgyo University was massive; the campus was so new and unfamiliar—he’d barely seen any of it. Yet, next to his new friends, sitting in the middle of the pinkest place probably in existence, Jaemin felt content knowing that he’d found people that made his world seem just a little smaller.

“Thank you so much again for the meal, Jaehyun,” said Kun, once they’d left Ann-Yum.

“I’m glad to. I hope today was a good start for all of you.” He stopped to think. “Does everyone have someone to walk home with?”

Jaemin was going to head to Dansim with his hallmates, while Jaehyun and Mark were planning on taking Jeno to Baedal on their way back to the house.

“You know I can take care of myself, Jaehyun,” Ten responded. “If it makes you feel better though, I was going to go with Jaemin for a little bit.”

Jaehyun nodded. “Get home safe.”

As they swapped their “good nights,” Jaemin opened his phone to a message from Jaehyun; it was the photo he had taken of the four of them at dinner. Lucas was handsome as ever, cool and puppy-like at the same time in his paper hat. Kun shined. Jaemin looked happy next to Jeno—they both did. That eye smile of his got Jaemin every time. _We look good together, huh_.

“Hey, Jaemin,” started Ten innocently, appearing beyond Jaemin’s screen. “Just one question.”

“What’s up?”

“So, when are you going to tell Jeno that you like him?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ten's a power bottom. Yoon Jisung deserves the world. Jaemin is the sweetest. And yes, this restaurant may or may not be inspired by a Hello Kitty Café.  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> Any other questions?


	8. Booty Jjigae

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

******♡ Jeno ♡**

 

The color pink reminded Jeno of Jaemin. It seemed to be ever-present when he was around or even when Jeno was thinking about him, from his clothes to the faint blush of his cheeks to the lovely way that he spoke and acted and just _was_. So, it felt only right when Jeno found himself admiring the light pink blossoms that surrounded Dansim Hall, a contrast to the white baedal varieties at his own dorm. In a sense, this was rather fitting, not only for Jaemin, but also to complement Jeno’s character as well. As fluffy cotton candy clouds melted into the sunset, he waited with his duffel bag at the main entrance, dreamily contemplating if anything reminded Jaemin of him.

After a few moments, the younger boy opened the door, wearing a simple cream shirt and brown chinos. His bangs fell over his forehead, causing him to look more boyishly cute than usual. Looking like that made it hard for Jeno not to like him so much.

“Jeno! You’re here,” said Jaemin, waving his student housing card. “I’ll show you my room.”

It turned out that Jaemin wasn’t the only one staying in 15 Petal House this year.

“Jaemin-ah. Who’s that on your wall?”

Jeno knew he won when an awkward smile crept onto Jaemin’s face.

“That’s from my parents, I swear,” Jaemin said defensively, his gaze darting back and forth from the full-size poster beside his bed to his friend next to him. In the photo, EXO’s Kai rested on soft blankets, staring deeply at you as if he wanted you to lay down in his strong embrace. Jeno could see the appeal...and also why Jaemin might be a little embarrassed to have it up at the same time—it was fun for Jeno to see him like this.

“He’s handsome, huh? I’m sure it’s comforting to have someone to sleep with at night.”

“Hey, that’s enough,” Jaemin declared, lightly hitting the black-haired boy on the shoulder. “It’ll be just Kai and I tonight if you keep this up.”

“Jaemin-ahhhhhh, let me stay here, pleeeaaassseee,” said Jeno as cutely as he could, pretending to nurse his wound while clinging onto an unimpressed Jaemin.

“You’re lucky I’m so nice, Lee Jeno. I set up the futon just for you _and_ I ordered food.”

Jeno couldn’t tease him anymore. “Where from?”

“Specially made.”

“Is it being delivered?”  
“You’ll see,” he promised, a glint in his eyes.

With sitcom-like timing, the entrance to room #15 was kicked open by a real-life character in not much more than a ribbed tank top, jeans, and a black apron around his waist, carrying two wooden  trays of budae jjigae in his bare arms.

“Hey,” greeted Lucas slowly, blowing messy strands of honey blonde out of his eyes. “Did you order something...hot?”

Kun emerged from behind his roommate, similarly bringing food but opting to remix Lucas’s outfit for a v-neck and full-length apron. “To be clear, I asked him to help me cook, _not_ pretend to be a pornstar.”

“Hey, don’t be jealous that I’m good at everything.”

Their chef was anything but that. “Just let them eat.”

“Okay, okay. Here you are, baby,” presented Lucas, flirty as usual, moving Jaemin’s open laptop farther down the coffee table to make room for their stews, a mixture of kimchi, instant ramen, and rice cakes with American products such as Spam, sausage, and cheese. Hot, orange broth bubbled around the ingredients, garnished with various mushrooms alongside green onions that added more color to the dish. The spicy smell made Jeno’s mouth water, though the steam arising from the bowls indicated that it hadn’t cooled enough for him to taste without burning himself.

“Thank you so much,” said Jeno. “You guys didn’t have to make me anything.”

Kun’s expression brightened. “No problem. I love to cook.”

“It looks great,” Jaemin added, sitting down between Jeno and Kun on the futon, to Jeno’s pleasure.

“Wait,” Lucas laughed. “I have an idea.” Before he went towards his friends, he propped his phone, set up to Instagram Live, against Jaemin’s computer. “Kun, what if—”

“Didn’t I say to stop acting like this is a free cam show?”

“Hey, you know that any time with me is _priceless_ ,” Lucas said, licking his lips as he pointed at them. “Anyway, this isn’t going to be like that! Haha! Us. Instagram. Mukbang. Let’s get it.”

“Not _again_.”

Jeno glanced over at Jaemin to see if he’d object too, but Lucas obviously had his heart (and his phone camera) set on this. Kun sighed. It was too late to stop him, even if they wanted to.

“BUDAE JJIGAE MUKBANG!”

 

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 **lucasbieber** started a live video. Watch it before it ends!

Press for more

 

“We gotta wait for some fans to join first, then we can eat,” **@lucasbieber** instructed as he squeezed in the middle of Jaemin and Kun, so he could be in the center view.

Kun shifted uncomfortably in his spot. “ _Fans_? How many followers do you have anyway?”

“21,818—and I love _every_ single one of you.” Putting his puckered lips in front of the screen, he gave his audience a _mwah_ for their support. “Tonight, I’m gonna do a mukbang with my new college bros for you. Say your names, you guys!”

Jaemin played along. “Hi, I’m Jaemin. Or you may call me ‘Nana,’” he greeted, throwing up a finger heart to Lucas’s uncontained support.

“OH, _you_ are Nana? HaHA! Ah, so cute!”

 _He wasn’t wrong about that one_.

“Hello, my name is Jeno.”

“Handsome boy! FAT KUN! Your turn!”

“Why do you have to call me th—”

Lucas didn’t let him finish. “Fat Kun made this delicious budae jjigae! It’s hot, like us. We hot! We young! Haha! Come on, let’s eat!” He brought a piece of Spam up to his tongue with some chopsticks, instantly regretting his decision as he spit it back into his bowl. Not one of them wasn’t laughing now. “Maybe I can answer some of your questions now instead. Ask me anything!”

Right now on the live video, Jeno counted a few hundred viewers (who probably should be doing something better with their Friday night), spamming their friend with never ending hearts and thirst comments:

 

 **@luwucas** : marry me

 

 **@lovechoerrymotion** : you look so handsome today ♡

 

 **@nayanadaewhi** : what songs would you recommend to us lately?

 

 **@luwucas** : marry me pls

 

 **@tenoutof10** : take off your shirt, daddy

 

 **@xdoyeonniex** : when are you dyeing your hair next? I think you’d look cute with dark brown

♡ ♡ ♡

“That one _has_ to be Ten,” Jaemin declared, amused at his comment.

“Ayyy, let’s call him to the mukbang!”

Accepting **@lucasbieber** ’s invitation, the phone screen split in half, fading in from black to a very relaxed Ten laying down in a lavender silk robe.

“So, is this the part where Lucas takes off his shirt?”

Ten certainly didn’t waste any time. Apparently, Lucas didn’t need any extra encouragement either, teasingly lifting up his white tank to expose his tanned abs.

“OKAY, that’s finished,” interrupted Kun, to the dismay of “fans” everywhere, as well as their obviously disappointed friend on the call. “I’m sure you would’ve ripped it apart by now if we weren’t here.”

Lucas hadn’t erased the smirk off his face. “I had to give them a taste if they can’t come eat with us! It’s only fair.”

“He’s right,” mewled Ten. “Jaemin thinks so too.”

A familiar rosy tint bloomed on Jaemin’s cheeks as he sat next to Jeno, whose body tensed up in jealousy. _Lucas?_ Although he didn’t have the words to properly say anything more about the situation, Ten had a few:

“Jaemin and Jeno look cute together.”

Both of their faces were completely red. If Jaemin wasn’t very talkative before, he was silent now, though Jeno wasn’t quite sure why the other boys on the futon joined him in his quietness. Jaemin, Kun, and Lucas stared at each other as if they all knew something that Jeno didn’t and didn’t want him to find out about. Regardless, nobody commented further on what Ten said, pretending not to be aware.

“Hey, babe,” said a boy’s deep voice on Ten’s side of the call. A tall, broad figure lowered himself into view of the phone, where it became undeniably apparent that a single towel was in the way of potentially flashing everyone who was currently watching. “Are you ready for round two?”

Ten bent over towards whoever was speaking to him, “I’ve been waiting, daddy.”

“Oh, _daddy_?”

The four of them lost their shit.

“OH MY GOD,” blurted Lucas at full volume.

“Wait. Who’s that?”

Suddenly, Ten’s half of the screen shifted in perspective as someone grabbed his phone for a closer look, shattering Jaemin’s silence.

“JOHNNY?”

Ten’s phone dropped just as quickly as it was picked up, landing hard on the floor, followed by the sounds of frantic screams from Jaemin’s side of the call when each group realized what was truly happening.

“Ten,” pleaded Johnny, “How the fuck do you turn this off?”

Jeno was too embarrassed to even look, let alone make a noise.

Kun had his head down. “Are you having sex with _our RA_?”

“I mean, not _yet_ ,” Ten answered, nonchalant as ever, before he was cut off and the video returned to just **@lucasbieber** and his friends, all equally scarred by the exchange.

“Umm,” Lucas muttered to the camera. “I’ll talk more with you guys soon.” His big fingers hit the “Discard Live Video” button, returning to his lap. “I...don’t think I’ll add this one to my story.”

At the end of the futon, Kun’s hands hadn’t moved from his face.

“Is this why Johnny isn’t on duty tonight?”

♡ ♡ ♡

Pajama bottoms were a lot more comfortable than jeans, at least to Jeno, who laid down on his bed for the night in a striped pair and baseball tee, thinking to himself as he waited for Jaemin to finish getting ready. Their mukbang with the boys of room #17 was... _eventful_ , to say the least. Never had he expected to witness the verbal foreplay between two of his fellow NCT members, let alone to do so in such a particular setting. Ten’s daddy kink (and Johnny’s willingness to fulfill it) aside, Jeno kept replaying the way Jaemin responded to Ten’s comments. He vividly recalled the color of Jaemin’s cheeks after Lucas showed off his body, as well as the deeper shade and wordless expression he had on when Ten said Jaemin and him looked cute together. So much had happened since then, yet Jeno was unable to stop comparing himself to Lucas, going headfirst into the possibilities that connected Jaemin’s reactions, ultimately deciding that maybe Jaemin’s feelings went beyond just him. Lucas was not just gorgeous, but somehow irresistibly charismatic to back it up. Jaemin deserved someone like that. The more Jeno thought about it, the more his mind accepted it.

“Jeno!”

His heart would need some time to do the same.

Closing the door behind him, Jaemin had traded in his pants for gym shorts, tying the drawstrings together into a little bow. Jeno was mad seeing him, not because he did something wrong, but because of how Jaemin looked at him like _that_ ; his brown eyes were fixed only on him as his soft peachy pink lips gave way to the smile that greeted Jeno on the day they first met.

“Jaemin-ah.”

“Were you waiting for me?”

 _Of course_.

“I couldn’t fall asleep yet.”

The younger boy made his way to his fridge, bringing two chocolate milks back. He handed one to Jeno as he silently asked him to make some room on the futon.

“Jaemin-ah,” began Jeno, nervously, “Can I ask you a question?”

He met his eyes again.

 _Fuck, this was a bad idea_.

“Go ahead.”

“What do you think about Lucas?”  
  Jeno felt bad as the words left his mouth. He wished he could say he felt guilty just out of pity for himself and not for potentially making Jaemin uncomfortable around him. Jaemin took the straw out of his mouth, probably pondering exactly what Jeno was asking.

“He’s one of the best friends I’ve made here,” Jaemin said, finally. “I like how he’s always the same way around everyone, no matter what happens.”

Jaemin’s phone buzzed in his lap, notifying him that **@lucasbieber** tagged him and two others in a post. _I have to hand it to Lucas for his timing_. It was a picture of the four of them before they ate, utensils at the ready, fondly captioned, “booty jjigae bros.” Jeno chuckled, unknowing of whether or not Lucas spelled it like that on purpose, but knowing it was funny either way. Jaemin clicked on Lucas’s profile, bringing him to a follower count that had already increased since the mukbang and a bio that simply read, “L U C A S.” He truly was a man of many words, not to mention, photos of himself, with a good quarter of his most recent twelve posts showcasing a fair amount of skin, whether that be in sleeveless tops or without one at all. Clicking on an example of the latter from last Monday featured a chest-up shot of Lucas on grey sheets, looking to the side with an arm over his mouth, captioned “school tomorrow.”

“I don’t think I could trust a boy who’s _that_ good at taking pictures of himself,” Jaemin joked. “I guess this is why he has so many followers though haha. I’m sure any of them would be more than ready to spend some time with him, but I personally wouldn’t be able to handle him doing mukbangs on our dates.”

“You’d pass on a one-on-one meet and greet with _the_ @lucasbieber?”

Jaemin laughed, sounding sweeter than the chocolate milk in their hands. “I’d rather spend that time with you.”

 _This boy is going to be the end of me_.

“Uhh...thank you.”

_Jeno, what the fuck?_

“Here, I’ll take this,” said Jaemin, throwing away their empty containers as a transition. “I’m getting a little tired too.”

Even after finishing his drink, Jeno’s mouth felt dry from his dumb response. “Okay.” He settled onto the futon, pulling the blanket over his body as Jaemin climbed into his own bed. “Good night, Jaemin-ah.”

“Good night, Jeno.”

Jaemin rolled around, so Jeno could only see the back of his head. He stared at the ceiling, knowing that the boy he liked was just across the room from him.

“Jeno.”

“Huh?”

Moonlight streaked into the center of the room, forming a halo around Jaemin’s face. The two boys turned towards each other. Jeno could see Jaemin grinning slightly at his reaction—it was an unconscious habit of Jeno’s when he was confused or caught off guard.

“Can you believe that we’re already done with our first week at Daehaekgyo?”  
Jeno stopped. The thought slipped his mind with how busy he’s been lately. “I remember putting a condom on that model penis like it was yesterday.”

There was that laugh of his again—Jeno didn’t think he’d ever get sick of hearing it.

“I feel like I’m beginning to get used to actually being here. Sometimes, it still doesn’t seem like it’s happening for real.

“What do you mean by that?”

Jaemin yawned. “It’s like...I didn’t know what to expect this year to be like and it’s so different from what I thought, but, _wow_ , this is our life now, y’know?”

For some reason, Jeno knew exactly what he meant.

“I understand, Jaemin-ah.”

It was quiet once more, yet neither seemed to mind. The silence was comfortable between them. Just being in each other’s presence was enough.

“I’m happy I met you, Jeno.”

“Me too.”

Soon, Jeno could hear the sound of Jaemin sleeping, gentle, but audible. He looked so peaceful. There was nothing more that Jeno wanted right now than to join Jaemin in his bed and put his arm around his waist and lay next to him, their hearts beating in sync against one another. He longed to keep him safe—to be with him. Jeno’s gaze returned to the ceiling, both arms resting underneath his head on his pillow. _Why couldn’t he have just said “good night” to me?_ He looked over at Jaemin another time and sighed, entirely aware that there was no way he was going to get over him anytime soon. As the younger boy continued to sleep soundly, Jeno whispered the words to himself that he wished he could say to Jaemin when he was still awake:

“Jaemin-ah, I like you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bro, if you haven't tried budae jjigae, you gotta get on that.  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> Thanks to everyone for reading my writing though. It's honestly so wild to see y'all get this far into it as I do the same—it helps me stay motivated. Exams are about to come and bareback my ass, so I'm not sure if I'll have Chapter 9 out by next Sunday, but I'll do my best to make sure y'all got good shit to read! LESSGETIT


	9. Tea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

******♡ Jaemin ♡**

 

“Hell Week” was called just that for a reason. Worn out after four consecutive dance practices until three in the morning, Jaemin, literally, at times, dragged himself through his classes. While school had been in session everyday for over a month, NCT practice was scheduled for only twice a week until now. Leading up to the group’s first and biggest performance of the fall semester at Seoul’d Out, Daehaekgyo’s annual arts festival, all of the members were required to show up nightly to the Nu Chi Tau house. To Jaemin’s relief, the last of these rehearsals was tonight, although it’d, without a doubt, be their longest practice.

“I’m not looking forward to it,” sighed Jaemin, thanking his friend for the iced green tea latté. “I was going to pay for this, y’know.”

Ten rolled his eyes as he picked up the same order for himself. “I’m sure you were.”

Drinks (and jokes) aside, Jaemin could see why Ten made this trip so often. Tucked in the back of Seonho Flower Market was Star Blossom, a café unlike any Jaemin had ever seen. Framed by brick and wood paneling, iron arches ran from the floor to the ceiling, draped with vibrant green foliage hanging from potted plants. Edison light bulbs evenly strewn about the vines bathed the teahouse in warmth, while the scent of nature and brewing tea added to the place’s tranquility. Parallel rows of square glass tables and black garden chairs formed the majority of the café’s seating, made even more whimsical with the addition of leafy planters underneath each seating arrangement. A wall-sized window was the only sign of the outside world. Quiet conversation and soft sips and IU’s “Palette” carried through to Jaemin’s ears. He welcomed the noise. Being here felt like an escape from everything—it was exactly what he needed right now.

“Did you sleep well last night, Ten?”

The grey-haired boy took his straw between his index and middle fingers, dreamily twirling it around in his glass. “Not a lot of sleeping.”

“You’re annoying.”

“I was busy writing my English essay! You need to stop thinking like that.” Ten’s dark brown eyes glinted through the oval-shaped lenses of his glasses. “It’s kinda hard to write when you’re being bent over your desk though.”

Jaemin choked a little on his latté.

“How long have you been...seeing Johnny, anyway?”

Ten thought for a moment. “Since NCT retreat.”

“That was over a month ago.”

“You’re pretty good at math.”

“Hold up,” Jaemin paused, “You guys had sex at Chenle’s house?”

“It wasn’t what I planned on doing. After everyone went to go swimming, I wanted to take a break before I joined in on. I guess Johnny had the same idea. We just talked and drank for awhile in one of the guest bedrooms and then, we didn’t talk so much anymore.” Ten had another sip. “I keep forgetting to tell Lucas that we borrowed some condoms from his bag though.”

Jaemin didn’t know what was worse: that his RA and Ten needed to steal protection from Lucas or that his friend even brought that to their group bonding retreat in the first place. He was probably better off not knowing the answer to that.

“I’m not even going to ask.”

“Whatever works,” he smiled. “Johnny and I have known each other since we’ve been at Daehaekgyo, but it’s just casual between us right now.”

“Does ‘casual’ mean almost doing it on Instagram Live?”

“Hey, I didn’t plan on _that_ either. Johnny got a little upset, which, was okay with me.”

 _I can never look at my RA the same way_.

“I don’t think I want anything more than this right now though,” continued Ten. “Going after someone isn’t really my thing. But it is nice to have someone that you can forget about your responsibilities with, from time to time.”

They exchanged a nod, each well-aware of how their obligations have been stacked lately. Today felt like one of the first times Jaemin was able to catch his breath all week—to let go, for just a second.

“Not that going after someone is necessarily a bad thing though...especially when you know you both have feelings for each other, right, Jaemin-ah?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jaemin replied, clearly on the same page as Ten.

“Sure, you don’t. You also must not know that no matter how tired you are from practice, you would never give up an opportunity to spend more time with Jeno—neither would he.”

“ _Really_?”

“Jaemin,” Ten pointed out, “You like him a lot. The thing is, I can tell that he likes you too, maybe as much as you like him. Why aren’t you two together yet?”

Jaemin had finished his drink, his straw now aimlessly making empty noise at the bottom of his cup. He stared blankly at the purple orchids between him and Ten, searching for any answer. Except, Jaemin didn’t have a response to give Ten, not a good one, at least. He wanted it to happen—he _really_ wanted it to happen.

“I know putting yourself out there is never easy—“

“I don’t think that’s it though,” replied Jaemin, slowly, “I feel like I don’t even have to put myself out there with Jeno. I can be myself around him, more than I am with anyone else at Daehaekgyo...I don’t want to change that, if I tell him about my feelings for him.”

Ten placed his empty glass on the table and leaned towards his friend. “If—no, _when_ you’re ready, I think you should talk to him. You can’t ignore the way you feel, Jaemin-ah, like how I know hearing me say that doesn’t sound as nice as when Jeno does it.”

”Why don’t you ever pay this much attention in class?”

“I put all my effort into one thing at a time. Writing 101 is focused on embarrassing Jisung.”

“ _Flirting_ with Jisung?”

“There’s not a young professor in just any of my classes, y’know,” said Ten, leaning back in his chair as if this made total sense. “If it weren’t for him, or Johnny, Jeno _is_ really cute, huh.”

Jaemin had to laugh. “You’re funny too.”

“What would you do about it, anyway?”

“I’m cute. I don’t have to do anything.”

They both laughed.

“Well, if _that’s_ not enough for Jeno, there are plenty of other cute, stupid boys on campus. Lucas, obviously, and Jaehyun is so sweet to spend a night with, although he lowkey has a thing for Taeyong, everyone loves Winwin—”

“Jaehyun too?”

Ten pretended to be innocent. “We’re talking about you, not me, remember?”

“You’re _so_ annoying.”

“I’ll tell you about it when you’re older.”

♡ ♡ ♡

There was something strangely peaceful about Daehaekgyo before the sun rose. The cold hit Jaemin as he stepped outside of the Nu Chi Tau house, releasing him from his sweaty daze. His legs were sore and his body, as well as his mind were exhausted, yet Jaemin felt a vague sense of calm. He inhaled. He exhaled. He shut his eyes momentarily.

“Jaemin!”

His eyes opened again at the sound of Lucas’s voice.

“Jaemin, come eat gimbap with Fat Kun and I!”

“It’s 4 am,” Jaemin commented, half-amused, “Where are you two going to eat right now?”

“Gumiho! It’s open twenty-four hours a day,” reasoned Kun. “If we’re not going to get any sleep, we might as well not stay awake on an empty stomach.”

Lucas pulled Jaemin towards him, “Lessgetit!”

“Ah, I think I’m going to try to sleep before we have to be at the festival.”

The older boy stared at Jaemin as he let go of him. “Do you want me to bring you anything back? I can deliver!”

“I’ll be alright. Eat well for me. I’m going to head home.”

“Good night,” said Lucas, laughing as he hugged the younger boy again. “I’ll eat it all for you!”

Kun waved, “Get back safe.”

“Good night.”

The three of them always walked back together from practice to Dansim, but Jaemin didn’t mind being alone. He’d have fifteen minutes to himself, just to think.

“Are you walking home, by yourself, Jaemin-ah?”

Jeno’s dark hair stuck out unevenly as a result of dancing for hours. In his sleeveless black hoodie and distressed light-wash jeans, he looked good in the most impractically boyish way. Jaemin could see his bare arms tense up from the air. _He’s dumb_.

“Mhm, don’t worry about me. I like to walk. I have a jacket, so I won’t be too cold either.”

“I’ll go with you.”

Jaemin tried not to like that idea as much as he did. “Baedal is the other way though. Aren’t you going to go with Renjun and Jisung too?”

He turned away as Jeno’s eyes formed into two adorable crescent moons. “I want to go with you.”

Thinking to himself would have to wait.

Step by step, the two boys began to go towards Danism Hall. The silence between them was comfortable. Still, Jaemin wanted to talk.

“Are you cold, Jeno?”

“Not bad.”

_Did we move closer to each other?_

Without his own permission, Jaemin felt himself leaning on Jeno’s shoulder. The sensation was new, but comfortable. Bashful, he silently scolded himself for being so touchy around his friend.

“You can do that, if you want, Jaemin-ah. I don’t mind.”

He was even more shy now.

“Are you excited for our first performance?”

“To be honest, I’m really nervous.”

“How come?”

He sighed. “I just want to do my best. I don’t want to let anyone down.”

“You’re great though. You’ve never danced before either and you learn all of the moves so well. I think you’ll be amazing.”

Jeno smiled at him, his face illuminated by the lamp posts overhead as they drew towards familiar pink flowers. “You always look so happy whenever we’re at practice, even when it’s four o’clock in the morning.”

 _You’re there with me_.

“I didn’t think being apart of NCT would be this much fun,” said Jaemin, reflecting aloud. “It’s honestly my favorite part about being at Daehaekgyo. And all of the members are such cool guys too.”

“I agree. I haven’t had any regrets about trying out, other than not sleeping this week. It keeps me busy though.”

 _Tell him how you feel about him_.

“Jeno.”

“Hm?”

“I—”

Jaemin was choking. Time passed by more quickly than he had expected. The moment was gone. He was too late. He couldn’t do it.

“T-thank you for walking me home, Jeno.”

“Anytime.”

They hugged. Against Jeno’s chest, Jaemin felt warm and secure and _right_. He could hear the sound of his breathing, gentle yet strong. The time didn’t matter. Jaemin would stay in Jeno’s arms like this for as long as possible.

 _Tell him how you feel about him_.

They let go of each other.

“Good night, Jaemin-ah.”

“Good night, Jeno.” Jaemin placed a hand on the door handle while Jeno left in the opposite direction. “Jeno. Wait.”

“Hm?”

Jaemin’s speech wavered. “Text me when you get home, okay?”

He was brighter than the stars. “I will.”

Once Jaemin reached his dorm, he shut the door behind him, replaying the past fifteen minutes in his head like a favorite song. He inhaled. He exhaled. He closed his eyes momentarily. He opened his phone. He couldn't go to sleep. He wouldn’t go to sleep. Not yet. He’d wait until he got that text from Jeno. He was content with waiting until then. Jaemin closed his eyes again.

He had to tell Jeno how he felt about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first eight chapters of Asadal were written in the summer, during days and nights of free time after my first year of college. In September, once I started my second year, it became clear to me that ya boy does not have as much time to write while taking seventeen credits of classes (which is why, this chapter is the first update in over a month)! Already more than halfway through the fall semester, I've continued to learn things about college, life in general, and myself, which has not only made me return to writing as a creative outlet, but has also inspired and reenergized me to finish sharing this story. Although these past few months have been filled with ups and downs and comebacks (figuratively speaking, but also all these comeback stages), I have a stronger sense of how to make Asadal even better now.  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> So, expect Jaemin and Jeno in the future (this might not be on a weekly or a regular basis, though I'll try my best to do so)! It's only halfway finished. To all the new readers, thank you for taking the time to read my lil' story. And to anyone who has read every chapter so far, I promise that there'll be even more. LESSGETIT!
> 
> (P.S. I recently dyed my hair and pierced my ears, so if, for some reason, you'd like to put a face to the name, "porkjihoon," and/or fuel my love of attention, find me on Instagram: @bigreputasian !)


	10. Seoul-O

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jeno ♡**

 

Jeno concluded two things to himself: first, he was very nervous to perform and secondly, he was very nervous that his nerves would show up during their set. NCT was scheduled to go on at exactly 8:00. Until then, the group spent the day exploring the plaza together, taking in all of the excitement of the festival. Stores and shops and small street food vendors filled downtown Daehaekgyo on two sides for two stories tall. Fairy lights twinkled along the leafy branches of tall trees, while pop music and carefree laughter echoed through the streets. Daehaekgyo always felt energetic to Jeno, but the energy throughout Seoul’d Out felt different—the city itself seemed alive.

In the center of the square were four concentric circles, carved into the cement. Tonight, these rings would form the performers’ stage. Acts ranging from dancers and DJs to bands and ballad-singers would all perform here as crowds formed around them. The eighteen boys, in matching denim on denim outfits, were among the current audience, eagerly awaiting the last performance before their own. A turntable sitting atop a mobile DJ booth, stamped “DJ Hankki,” was wheeled out towards the innermost circle. The DJ appeared to be in his late twenties, dressing his white baseball shirt with a goofy expression. As the music began, a collective scream from nearby almost completely drowned out the mutual gasp by Jaemin and Ten.

“Jaemin, Is that _Jisung_?”

“No way,” exclaimed Jaemin. “I think it _is_.”

Little by little, Jeno’s worries faded away as the pounding electronic beat dropped. Professor or not, DJ Hankki knew how to pump up the crowd. Lifting his sneakers off the ground, Jeno jumped to the music, letting himself be taken away. The experience was loud, wild, immersive. Everyone seemed to feel the same way, dancing as if they all knew each other. Jeno looked at his friends’ freestyling and laughed. Their moves were all over the place, unlike the cleanness they strove to convey in their upcoming set. Johnny lifted Haechan onto his shoulders while Lucas and Mark were doing whatever it is that those two do. In the multicolored lights, Jaemin’s smile seemed even more radiant. No words were said between them—none were needed to share this feeling. DJ Hankki ended his show with EXO’s “Power” whose chorus seemed to be sung by a single voice across campus. It was just what Jeno needed to hear.

After the applause died down, Taeyong gathered the boys for a pep talk of their own.

“We’ve all been working so hard, day after day, night after night, for this performance and I couldn’t be prouder of what we’ve accomplished so far,” he began. “Each one of you are essential to his group. Without every single member, NCT would be incomplete. Now, it’s time to show everyone what we can do; it’s time to show the world who all eighteen of us are together—who NCT is.”

Eighteen hands met in the middle.

“1, 2, 3. To the world, we are NCT!”

The boys made their way to center stage, walking in formation. Their setlist consisted of four songs, each of them were refreshing and full of youthful energy. DJ Hankki stood aside, microphone in hand to introduce them.

“How is everyone tonight?”

As if his performance didn’t already give any indication of that.

“I am DJ Hankki, but to many students at Daehaekgyo University, including two members of this upcoming group, I am Professor Yoon Jisung.” He cheerfully waved to Jaemin and Ten, who still seemed to be in partial disbelief. “Our next performers are an all-male dance group called Neo Culture Technology, first formed by five students from Daehaekgyo’s Nu Chi Tau fraternity chapter, which has since expanded into an impressive eighteen in total. Led by Nu Chi Tau president, Lee Taeyong, the group hopes to showcase each member’s individual talents, as well as their talent as one unit for the first time this year. This is NCT!”

Breathing in and out, Jeno sat down in his starting position, across from Jaemin and behind Mark, who began front and center. Jeno’s nerves returned, but they felt almost ready to be immediately released. A few seconds had passed when a guitar riff boomed from the speakers and Changbin’s “na na na na na” kicked off Stray Kids’ “My Pace,” to the recognition of many in the audience. After Mark finished the first moves, Jeno met Jaemin with a high-five, joining the older member with finger-guns raised until everyone was on their feet, arms and legs in the air. When they reached the chorus as Lucas shouted Felix’s “you ready?/let’s go!,” NCT hit every beat together, moving as one until just the rookies were left to have their own time in the spotlight with The Boyz’ “Giddy Up.”

Split into three equal groups of three for the song’s second verse, the new members were all smiles. Not quite as bold as “My Pace,” “Giddy Up” let the younger boys of NCT show off their playful sides as their older counterparts cheered them on from the outer circles. Ten and Jisung each took turns in the center, demonstrating their natural abilities among the other newbies, although all the boys performed at the same calbier.

When the music began slowing down, the two halves of NCT traded places, transitioning into a sexier, more mature mood with Mark and Taeyong dancing to BamBam and Jackson’s respective “you make me/ ay, ay, ay”s in the second verse of GOT7’s “Lullaby.” Instead of catching his breath, Jeno spent his break to chant for the older members, who moved with sharp precision, yet seemingly without effort, especially during the stomping pre-chorus. Girls’ excited voices cheered for them. Jaehyun, in particular, won their adoration, smoothly embodying the song in his movements and facial expressions. Jeno looked up to Jaehyun, who had taught him so much about not only performing, but also life as  a whole, in the past weeks, the former of which Jeno would showcase now in their finale.

Ending as an entire group once again, NCT picked up at the instrumental before the bridge of “Clap” by Seventeen. They had spent the most amount of time trying to clean this section in order to end their set memorably. Each motion had to be perfectly executed in sync to avoid looking incohesive. Focused, Jeno heard the sound of eighteen pairs of hands clapping every count together throughout the last chorus until seventeen members lined up for their ending pose. Hands poised, Jeno moved from behind Johnny to center stage, taking his final position. With one final clap from NCT, the boys were met with the audience’s own enthusiastic applause as they breathlessly took a bow and thanked the crowd for their time.

“We did it,” declared Taeyong, to the group’s triumph.

Lucas already made up his mind on what they should do next. “LET’S EAT!”

“Ay,” Mark said, agreeing, “Lessgetit!”

Jeno could feel himself sweating underneath his jean jacket. Before he could take it off, an equally sweaty Jaemin came up to him.

“Good work up there.”

“Ah, you too, Jaemin-ah.”

“Are you hungry?”

Jeno internally checked himself over. “Honestly, I’ve been too nervous to eat.”

Jaemin smiled as he pushed his hair back. “Do you want to get a drink, at least?”

“I think I can do that.”

Holding onto their jackets, the two boys went in search of a victory treat, making their way through the crowd with their other arms linked together. Eventually, they found a worthy purchase at a small, peach-colored stand, manned by two young girls in vaguely familiar white button-up shirts and black skirts.

“Hello, I’m Chuu,” greeted the older of the two, whose hair was styled into bangs and pigtails. “What can I get you today?”

“Two chocolate milks,” answered Jaemin, taking out his wallet.

“I can pay, Jaemin-ah.”

He seemed surprised; it was cute when he was surprised. “Are you sure?”

“Of course.”

The younger girl, who couldn’t be more than fifteen years old, interrupted them. “Are you two dating?”

Jeno felt himself get warm. “Huh?”

“Yeojin! You can’t just ask strangers that.”

“Uhh,” Jeno struggled, not looking at Jaemin for help; Chuu seemed to sense this and quickly handed them the drinks and straws.

“Drink these well!”

“Thank you,” said Jaemin.

“Thank you very much,” repeated Jeno..

Neither boy made any comment about what had just happened. Jeno wasn’t sure about how to approach his feelings for Jaemin. _Yet_. For now, chocolate milk was just fine, although there was a part of Jeno that wished that he had said “yes” to Yeojin’s question instead.

“I still can’t believe we performed up there,” said Jaemin.

Jeno sipped absentmindedly from his straw. “It was the most fun I’ve had in so long.”

“You looked cute during your solo at the end.”

“Huh?”

_Did I hear him right?_

His response was rapid. “I said you looked nice during your solo.”

“Ah, I was so scared that I would mess that up, but I think I did well.”

Jaemin tilted his head towards him. “You should give yourself more credit.”

“You might be right. I think we all did very well.”

“That’s not a bad start,” Jaemin laughed, almost awkwardly. “Do you want to watch the rest of the performances with me?”

“I’d love to.”

The two of them found themselves back by the stage, though they now stood on the second story. They leaned against the second floor railing, overlooking the performance venue below, where there was nothing set up besides a microphone stand. The sky was darker now, but the festival kept going. DJ Hankki, or Professor Yoon, or Jisung, or all of the above was about to introduce the next act.

“Since he won’t be humble about it at all, I certainly won’t be humble about either. He may not look like it, but he’s the best singer that I know _and_ one of my very good friends. Please welcome, Kim Jaehwan!”

A rather mousy-looking boy, presumably Jaehwan, walked out into the microphone, carrying a simple acoustic guitar around his torso.

“Please, feel free to sing along.”

Jaehwan began to strum the first few chords of a familiar tune: “If You” by BIGBANG. The notes alone were bittersweet enough to listen to.

“Jeno.”

“Huh?”

Jaemin shifted his gaze up from his feet to meet Jeno’s eyes. “I’ve been thinking about what those girls said back there.”

Slowly, Jaehwan begin to sing; his voice was strong and clear and full of emotion:

**“She is leaving and I can’t do anything.”**

Jeno’s throat got dry, looking at the other boy. “What do you mean, Jaemin-ah?”

**“Love is leaving.”**

“I’ve been thinking about _us_ for awhile.”

**“Like a fool, I’m blankly standing here.”**

_Why do I feel so scared?_

**“I’m looking at her, getting farther away.”**

“I’m really happy that we’re such good friends, Jeno...I just can’t stop thinking that I might—no, I _do_ , want for us to be more than that.”

 **“She becomes a small dot and then disappears**.”

Feeling more and more afraid of what Jaemin was saying, Jeno wondered with all of his being why he felt this way upon hearing Jaemin tell him that he felt the same way as he did.

**“Will this go away after time passes?”**

“I think...I’ve felt this way since the day we met.”

 _Me too_.

**“I remember the old times. I remember you.”**

_Why can’t I say anything to him?_

This is what Jeno wanted for so long, as long as Jaemin had, yet it felt like exactly the opposite now and Jeno had absolutely no idea why.

“I feel more comfortable with you than I am with anyone here,” Jaemin began again, his voice starting to shake, hurting Jeno so much to hear, even though he didn’t know how to properly express it to Jaemin.

 _Me too_.

**“If you, if you, if it’s not too late.”**

“I like you, Jeno. I like you a lot.”

_I like you too._

**“Can’t we get back together?”**

There were an infinite amount of words that Jeno wanted to say right now, but none of them were able to leave his mouth.

**“If you, if you, if you’re struggling like I am.”**

“Aren’t you going to say _something_ , or anything, Jeno?”

Tears started to fill the corners of Jaemin’s brown eyes; Jeno wanted to wipe away these tears more than anything else in the world. After keeping it in for so long, Jaemin’s lips were turned down in a frown, struggling to get his words out to Jeno, who couldn’t even speak one word to him. Jaemin was absolutely perfect to Jeno and now he was crying over him; he was in pain because of Jeno. The sight of this beautiful boy starting to cry—the best friend who he’s spent almost everyday with and almost every night thinking about since they first met, broke Jeno’s heart.

**“Can’t we make things a little easier?”**

_Just tell him how you feel, Jeno. Please._

Jeno began to cry too; his voice trembled, trying to respond to Jaemin.

“I’m sorry, Jaemin-ah,” he said, choking back his own tears. “I’m just not good enough for you.”

The tears Jaemin had been holding now fell down his cheeks.

“ _What_?”

“I have to go.”

“Jeno—”

Jeno ran. He ran away from the boy he liked most of all. He ran in no particular direction, other than to run away. He wanted to run away from everybody and everything and from himself. As he ran, tears running down his face, one last line of Jaehwan’s singing made its way to him:

**“I should’ve treated you better when I had you.”**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, this was probably the hardest chapter yet to write because it was lowkey pretty emo ("Light Angst" is tagged for this reason lmfao), but I hope it was done well. I'm not gonna lie, I was lowkey emo too when I wrote that last part. It was a lot lol.
> 
> If the bolded/quoted text didn't clearly convey the English translation of the "If You" lyrics, I don't know what else to say other than maybe try reading that part again, homie. If you haven't hear it, check out Jaehwan's fantastic cover of "If You" that he did on King of Masked Singer. He's an amazing vocalist and my Wanna One bias-wrecker (after Daniel, my ult—call me basic). I can't wait to cheer him and the rest of Wanna One on for their last comeback, which comes out TOMORROW !! That's going to be emo, as well.
> 
> And on a lighter note, because I've been busier with school, I'll be coming out with a Halloween chapter soon (I'm so sorry it's already Thanksgiving, y'all). I'm still debating whether or not I want to stay true to NCT's Halloween costumes from this year/previous years, or exercise my own creative control, buttttt I'm also open to any ideas that y'all might have, so drop them below! As always, thanks for reading, y'all.  
> ♡♡♡  
> lessgetit


	11. Pink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

******♡ Jaemin ♡**

 

Being lonely is a strange feeling, Or, maybe Jaemin was just alone—he wasn’t quite sure he knew what the difference was, or if there even was a difference, or whether or not he was feeling one or both at the same time. After Seoul’d Out, life simultaneously managed to slow down and accelerate as studying for midterm exams replaced nightly dance practices. Lately, Jaemin hadn’t seen too much of NCT, or really, anyone at all outside of his classmates, when he made it to class, that is. If his Writing 101 essay was to be turned in on time, however, that meant having to go to Jisung’s office hours for help...at 8:00 in the morning.

“Jaemin!” Jaemin’s professor was looking very much so like a professor today, sporting a grey tweed jacket over a crisp, white button-up and a wide, patterned black tie. “I’m _not_ going to spill this one,” he joked, pointing to the cup of coffee in his hands. “What are you drinking?”

“Venti Iced Americano with ice, no water, and four extra shots of espresso,” he fired off without blinking.

“Isn’t that about eight shots total?”

“I need them.”

“Well, cheers to that, Jaemin.” They clinked their cups together. “Come in.” Jisung gestured for his student to take a seat. “How may I help you today?”

“Ah, well, I’m having a hard time revising my final draft for my bildungsroman.”

Jisung began searching for Jaemin’s draft on his laptop. “Is there anything specific that I should be looking at?”

“I feel like I know what my character’s problem is, but I’m not exactly sure how to develop it?”

The professor nodded. “Let’s begin there then. What obstacles does Junhee have to overcome in order to come of age?”

“Uh, he’s lonely. At least, he feels that way.” Listening intently—quietly—Jaemin wasn’t sure what Jisung was thinking. “Uhh, even though he knows that he has friends around, I guess he still feels like...alone, if that makes sense.”

“Why do you think Junhee might be feeling this way?”

“I think...being in a new place was a big transition for him, especially since he’s kind of on his own and has to learn how to be more independent. I don’t think he really wants to do that though.” Jisung only continued to look at Jaemin while he spoke. “It’s hard for him, uh, to figure out how to be alone, I guess. But he knows that it’s necessary for him to um...grow?  Being alone, that is.” Jaemin felt himself starting to get choked up. “He doesn’t like it though. At all. And I don’t think it’s that he hates himself or anything? Something is just... _wrong_ —he’s not...as h-happy as he knows he could be.” _Oh my god. Just stop._ “And he doesn’t know why either,” Jaemin sniffled. “I think, no, that _is_ the hardest part. It’s hard. It’s _so_ . _Hard_. He just feels alone and he doesn’t even know why.”

 _You’re fine, Jaemin_.

Jisung’s eyes widened. “Jaemin, are you okay?”

_Why did he have to ask that?_

“I-I’m... _fine_ ,” he said, crying in front of his professor before most of the campus was even awake. His hands moved up to his face, in an attempt to preserve his pride. It wasn’t very effective. “I’m sorry.”

“No, no, no, don’t be,” said Jisung, scrambling to pull a tissue out of the box for Jaemin as he moved around the desk toward his student. “It’s okay.”

Jaemin felt like a mess. It was the second time he had cried in front of someone else in the past week, but it was the first (and hopefully, last) time he had ever done so in front of a teacher. It was embarrassing. He reached for a second tissue.

“Would it make you feel better if I cried too?”

The genuine concern on his professor’s face was amusing, even now. Jaemin sniffled again, interrupted by a small, pained laugh. He was so glad that he couldn’t see what he looked like right now. Jaemin could only imagine himself in his hoodie and sweatpants, with his eyes puffy from tears and his nose reddening. He almost wanted to apologize for a second time.

“No, I can do it. I can do it,” he repeated, for his own sake. “I always get things done. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“I believe you.”

Little by little, Jaemin regained his composure. “What should I do about the problem though? Uh, _Junhee_ ’s problem. Not mine.”

Jisung clasped his hands together, interlocking his fingers in front of his mouth. “When we try to overcome our struggles, we have to start by addressing them; we have to be aware of how we’re feeling, even, or, _especially_ , if it’s affecting us a lot. After that...we have to do something to try to make ourselves feel better. Once you’ve established this in your story, you can decide what comes next. Make a choice. And eventually, you’ll get there. Is that helpful?”

Jaemin wondered how much his professor was talking about his story. He crumpled up the used tissues in his fist and sipped from his coffee. “Thank you, Jisung.”

“Is there anything else that I can help you with?”

“No,” Jaemin quickly replied, making a mental note to take it slower. “I think...what you said makes sense. Thank you.” He slung his backpack over his shoulders and headed towards the door. “Thank you again.”

Jisung stood all the way up. “Jaemin.”

“Yes?”

“You have until the Friday before Halloween to submit your paper.”

“That’s another week after it’s due.” He tilted his head at his teacher.  “I can turn it in this week.”

“I believe you, Jaemin. You have until the Friday before Halloween.”

They nodded at one another, smiling without their teeth and raising their disposable coffee cups in understanding.

 _Thank you_.

♡ ♡ ♡

“Make a choice. And eventually, you’ll get there.”

Jaemin heard his professor’s words echo in his head as he approached the Nu Chi Tau house after skipping the rest of his classes. He was already on his sixth Americano since that morning and he would probably drink another. It was a bad habit of his. Some of the other NCT members had noticed, so he managed to get down to only two, if he really tried. Today was an exception.

 _Sorry, Kun_.

He took a breath.

 _Eventually, you’ll get there_.

“You walk fast,” greeted NCT’s leader, wearing clear-rimmed glasses with a black bucket hat. Thin brown lines raced across his white turtleneck, tucked into a pair of baggy jeans.

“You look good, Taeyong.”

“Thank you. I was just doing some cleaning before the brothers throw our Halloween party next week. Are you excited?”

“I am, actually. Kun, Lucas, and I are planning on going together.”

“I’ll expect it well,” he smiled. “Is that why you’re doing this? For a costume?”

Jaemin returned the pleasant expression. “I wanted to try something new.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that, Jaemin. I just did this too.” Taeyong lifted up his hat to reveal newly dyed platinum bangs. “I’ll probably end the year with this color.”

“It suits you.”

“Let’s head upstairs.”

Taeyong led Jaemin into what appeared to be a large master bathroom on the second floor of the house. A black salon-style chair faced a mirror on one side of the space, while a separate glass shower and elevated jacuzzi bathtub occupied the other wall.

“This bathroom is nicer than my dorm,” Jaemin exclaimed.

“Perks of being chapter president. Take a seat.”

Consciously, Jaemin combed through his hair with his hands as he stared at his reflection in the mirror. _You’ve looked better._  Then aeyong took control, feeling the long strands of light brown in between his fingers with care.

“Have you ever done this before, Jaemin?”

“It’s my first time.” He panicked for a moment. “Wait. Does it hurt?”

“No, it just won’t feel as soft afterwards, if that’s okay,” Taeyong answered, focused on his work. “Don’t worry though. I’ve done this _a lot_ on my own. So, what color do you want it?”

 _Make a choice_.

“Pink.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kinda a shortie, but expect a longer chapter soon! Next up is Halloween! Lessgetit
> 
> Sometimes, these feelings kinda hit ya outta nowhere and you don't exactly know why you're sad or how to handle it. And it sucks.  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> Dyeing your hair is a cool distraction though. (Jaemin's pink "We Go Up" hair was the reason why I decided to do the same to my hair last month ♡)


	12. Blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jeno ♡**

 

Parties are always fun, in theory. But they’re more fun when your friends are there with you...even if they decide that you guys should paint your bodies blue to dress up as the Smurfs for Halloweekend. Still, it could’ve been worse for Jeno. At least, he wasn’t Smurfette.

“Next time, one of you has to wear a wig,” complained Renjun, itching at the mess of yellow hair underneath his baggy white hat.

“You lost, fair in square,” smiled Jisung, teasingly putting his arms around an unamused Renjun, who pushed the younger boy off of him. “Wow, you’re strong, even when you’re wearing a dress.”

Round glasses over his eyes, Chenle laughed while Jeno smiled through the fake Papa Smurf beard on his face. “It’ll be worth it when we win the costume contest and get the prize money,” Jeno declared. “And then we can wash this paint off.”

Renjun shivered in his pinafore. “Let’s get inside first and _then_ we can win.”

Outside, Jeno had never seen the Nu Chi Tau house so packed before. A long line of mostly tipsy students in their best (and not so best) Halloween costumes stretched around the block. The only thing that stopped the boys from joining the party now was the bro in charge of bouncer duty, a tall figure in a Tony the Tiger costume, although his attention seemed focused on the girl in front of him.

“Ay! Hello, guys,” greeted Johnny, looking anything but intimidating with black whiskers painted across his cheeks. “Happy Halloween—”

Without taking her hands off Johnny, the girl in front of them flipped her long, black-hair behind her and turned around to face Jeno and his friends. “Looking good, boys.”

“ _Ten?_ ”

Ten smiled. “No, I’m the Mona Lisa, Renjun. You make a cute Smurfette though.” Tenlisa put his attention back on Johnny the Tiger as he continued through the entrance. “Find me later.” The sight of Mona Lisa putting her tongue in the mouth of a cartoon animal cereal mascot was off-putting enough to Jeno, sober. He had a feeling things would be just as strange inside.

“Enjoy yourselves, guys!”

Mostly unrecognizable faces met the freshmen indoors. Anyone from blood-stained vampires to Minions in goggles to Disney princesses bumped into each other through the crowd, rowdily laughing as they spilled drinks from red Solo cups onto themselves and the sticky floor below them. Bright, colorful streaks that bounced off the walls made up the only source of light within the darkness. Downstairs, pounding bass blasted from the dance studio, where the bros set up their DJ station for every party. A couple, dressed as Jack and Rose from _Titanic_ sat at the foot of the ascending stairs together, where Jack was fixing Rose’s hair as she applied her lip tint.

“Thank you, Jack,” said the leading lady in a soft voice.

“Let’s win this contest,” he replied, taking her hand in his. “Jeno!”

Jeno waved to his friend. “Jaehyun! You look handsome.”

“Come dance with Jungwoo and I!”

The Smurfs just blinked.

“These costumes keep getting weirder and weirder,” said Renjun.

Entering the studio felt like going into another world. Puffs of suspiciously sweet smoke intermingled with sweaty heat as the room jumped off-beat to the pulsing house beat of SHINee’s “View.” Turning around, Jeno made sure that his friends were all accounted for: _One, two, three; Renjun, Chenle, Jisung; Smurfette, Brainy, Smurf._ Not too far from them, their own version of Jack and Rose danced a little _too_ closely together, remixing _Titanic_ ’s most famous scene as Jungwoo stood with arms spread out and his back arched against a drunk, laughing Jaehyun.

“LESSGETIT,” boomed a loud voice from behind him when he felt something swing at his as—

 _Squeak_.

“What the fu—Lucas!?”

In a blonde wig that was almost equally as awful as Renjun’s, Lucas proudly brandished a flashing BLACKPINK lightstick in his hand that he used as Thor’s hammer, raising it toward the stars. “I’M DRUNK!”

“I’ll take care of him,” said Kun, painted a bright Minion yellow in contrast to the Smurf blue of Jeno and his friends. “He had a lot to drink earlier at the pregame.”

“I’m oKAY,” Lucas declared. “Let’s have another!”

“Wait!”

Watching Thor be chased by his Minion, Jeno felt himself scan the party for someone else. Lucas was here. So, was Kun.

_Where is Jaemin?_

Liquid spilling onto his sneakers ended his search.

“Yo, I am so sorry,” said a husky-voiced boy. Cherry red strands swooped over the right side of his forehead, gently covering the eyebrow underneath while his head stuck out of an oversized polyester Taiyaki hat. Wearing a turtleneck that was the same deep shade of his hair along with black slacks, he carried himself playfully, but as cooly as one could given the endearing stupidity of his headpiece. “I’m Daniel. What’s your name?”

“Lee Jeno. It’s nice to meet you.”

The two boys firmly shook hands.

“Are you a freshman, Jeno?”

“Can you tell?”

Daniel laughed, his expression softening into one that highlighted his boyishness. “Welcome to your first Halloweekend! Do you need a drink?”

“Oh, no, that’s not really something that I do,” said Jeno, hoping the weird sense of embarrassment didn’t show itself through his face paint.

“That’s okay! You do whatever feels comfortable to you, as long as you’re having fun” Daniel replied, emptying the remaining contents of his cup down his throat. “Let me know if you change your mind though.” He smiled and began walking towards the kitchen for presumably more alcohol. “Oh,” he started, facing back towards Jeno, “Make good choices.”

“I’ll try my best.”

Jeno wondered if Daniel would even remember meeting him tomorrow morning. It seemed like Jeno met someone new at every party, though none of them clicked with Jeno as much as the company he had here of Smurfs, a shipwrecked pair of lovers, and an Asgardian dumbass. It was fun to just let loose with his friends; parties were never meant to be taken too seriously—that is, unless there was a cash prize involved.

“AY,” yelled a bespectacled bro in a bow-tie and suit jacket. “Anyone that wants to be in the costume contest, come up... _here_ ,” he finished, going up onto an elevated platform in the center of the room, where Jeno could now see the rather cutesy bottom half of his outfit, a pair of shorts and sneakers.

Fake blood dripping from his mouth, Doyoung continued Mark’s announcement from the other side of the makeshift stage. “What we’re gonna do is cheer for the costume that you think is the best. I know we’ve had a lot to drink tonight but I _know_ you can do at least that, right?”

“DOYOUNG OPPA!”

“SEXY!”

The bro vampire took the microphone away from his face and glared at his fellow bros in the audience.

“Anyway, LESSGETIT!”

Renjun huddled them together. “This is us. Let’s win!”

Joined by Jack and Rose, Jeno, Renjun, Chenle, and Jisung approached the stage to drunkenly raucous cheers. Even in the darkness of the frat house, Jeno managed to feel a little self-conscious.

“I don’t think anyone will recognize you,” said Renjun, as if he read Jeno’s mind.

“You’re right.”

“Jeno is cUTE,” Lucas helpfully offered, already smiling onstage.

Doyoung approached the boy in his wig. “What do we think of Thor?”

The sound of Lucas’s enthusiastic shouting dissolved into the audience. Jeno couldn’t pay attention to what was happening around him in the contest. Flickering lights poured color onto the clean, white suit of a figure in the audience, who looked up from under his matching fedora. Despite the monocle and spiky bangs, Jaemin was hard to miss. The two boys hadn’t seen each other since the NCT performance. _Understandably._ Jeno wanted to shout to him, to ask how he was feeling and how life has been and if Jaemin wanted to say anything to him. Another flicker of lights and Mark was beside him, both of their faces scrunched in laughter. Mark’s childish costume made sense now. He was dressed as the seven year-old version of Detective Conan and Jaemin was his ally, the “uncatchable” magician and thief, Kaitou Kid. It was a planned costume. They had come together.

Jeno’s throat clenched. The results of the contest didn’t matter, nor was he paying any attention anyway. The group’s loss didn’t consciously occur to him, even when Renjun pulled him down the steps—Jeno was only looking at Jaemin.

“And the winners are Taeil and Winwin as beauty and the beast!”

Amidst the applause, the wild-haired Beast dipped his Belle, brown curls flowing behind her, and proclaimed, “My queen,” earning even more amused applause before Winwin, satisfied, gave Taeil an out of character kiss. The royal couple quickly descended, hand in hand, and shoved their way past Jeno, in a trance.

“What do I get for winning, Winwin?”

“I’ll show you in our room,” Winwin whispered into Taeil’s ear. Taking his boyfriend into his arms, partygoers encouragingly cleared a path for Winwin to head upstairs. Still, Jeno’s eyes hadn’t left Jaemin once as he watched Jaemin and Mark laughing even harder together.

Jeno had to leave.

He couldn’t be in that place for any longer. Not right now. He just wanted to be alone for awhile. Anywhere in the house seemed better than across from Jaemin with someone else. Without a second thought, Jeno silently followed behind Winwin and Taeil who had ducked into their room and locked the door behind them. _Gross._ Across the hall, the bathroom was occupied by someone violently throwing up. _Also gross._ His options at the moment were limited. Taking a cue from his bros, Jeno went into an empty bedroom and sat down on the floor. He’d ponder the ethics of his current actions later. _At least it’s not a complete stranger’s  room_ , he rationalized.

On the floor of one of his fellow NCT members’ bedroom, then, tears longed to flow out of the corners of Jeno’s eyes. Although Jeno succeeded in holding them in, the urge to let go was embarrassingly uncontrollable, heightened by the fact that he was by himself at a frat party while dressed as Papa Smurf.

“Jeno? Are you in here?”

_Just leave, Jeno._

“N—no…”

Jaehyun peered into the doorway, sympathy reflected in his eyes. “You can stay, if you’d like. This is my room.”

“No, of course not,” the freshman boy began, picking himself up, “I’m so sorry for coming up here.”

“Let’s talk.” Jaehyun moved next to Jeno on the floor. “Did something happen?”

Jeno sighed. “Not really.”

“Are you sure?”

“It’s not too important.”  
“If it’s important enough to make you come upstairs in the middle of this party, then it’s important to talk about.” The older boy kept his eye contact. “If you’re comfortable telling me, I want to hear it, Jeno.”

_Maybe drinking with Daniel does sound fun._

“I just...saw Jaemin and Mark, _together_. I haven’t seen Jaemin or talked to him since Seoul’d Out and now he’s here, with someone else.”

_It sounds even stupider out loud._

“You still like him?”

Jeno blinked. “Huh?”

“It doesn’t take paying too much attention to know that’s true.”

“He’s my best friend.”

“I know.”

Jeno continued to say the obvious, but it was how he was feeling. “I miss him.”

“I know.”

For awhile, the two boys just sat. The blasting music from downstairs was replaced by quiet introspection. _What do I do?_

“I think, if you care about Jaemin, eventually, you should talk to him.”

“What do I say?”

Jaehyun placed a hand on Jeno’s shoulder. After taking shot after shot, Jaehyun retained his composure. His next statement was as calm as ever: “You need to take care of yourself first. I know that sounds really cheesy, but it matters. The first year of college is the hardest part; you’re trying to adjust to a new place, go to all of your classes, be involved in different student organizations, make friends—you learn how to be busy. What you need to remember though, is that coming to Daehaekgyo wasn’t a decision that you made for Jaemin, or anyone else except for yourself. At the end of the day, your life revolves around you. _You_ can be sad—that’s natural and important too. Don’t let yourself stay sad for so long though.”

The tears that Jeno kept in were threatening to roll out. He looked up at Jaehyun to show that he was listening to every word that he said.

“ _You_ are the only one who can really make yourself happy. You’re so young, your life shouldn’t be solely focused on another person. I’ve known you for just these past few weeks and I’ve seen you, Jeno. You have such a good heart and the strongest will to help others; you have to care more about yourself. I can’t tell you exactly how—that part is up to you. But there’s nothing that you owe more to yourself than giving yourself the chance to find who you are and grow. Don’t think you have to know all of that at all right now. We’re all figuring it out, as we go, me included. That’s just how life goes.”

Wiping away at his eyes with the back of his fingers, Jeno laid his head on Jaehyun’s shoulder. “Thank you, Jaehyun. And I’m sorry if I get blue paint on you.”

There, on Jaehyun’s floor, at whatever am, the pair laughed as the party raged on below them. In the distance, screams of “TWICE!” made their way upstairs over a bubblegum pop beat. In the midst of their deep conversation, Jeno and Jaehyun found themselves doing the famous little “LIKEY” dance, pleased with their execution.

“You _can’t_ be sad when ‘LIKEY’ is on,” Jaehyun teased. “You _love_ ‘LIKEY.’ _Everyone_ loves ‘LIKEY.’”

“I can’t say that I disagree.” Without explicitly saying it, Jeno knew that Jaehyun asked if he was ready to go back downstairs. Jaehyun gave his friend a hand to help him stand up. Jaehyun would be there for him.

And Jeno would try to be there for himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, finals are finally done and it seems like this has somehow been the busiest and hardest, but most productive and quickest semester of college yet. Now that I have some more time away from school, in between holiday season retail work, applying for my study abroad program, and relaxing with friends and family, I'll be devoting a lot of my time to this fic until it's all done (which will be in only a few more chapters)!  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> Until then, I send my love to each and every one of you for reading. I hope you enjoy this seven week late Halloween chapter as Christmas comes in TWO days :'). Merry Christmas, to all of those who celebrate, and happy holidays! x


	13. Windows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jaemin ♡**

 

November was a blur.

Midterms were ass, _but_ they were over with and Jaemin had made it out alive and well— _well_ , he’d been better. After all that stress, it felt almost uneasy for life to continue without his future being determined by a single percentage. Jaemin wasn’t complaining at all though. College was proving to be much more challenging than he expected, in ways both within and beyond the classroom; even getting back to a normal routine was a break in itself.

“How is it already the middle of the month?”

“It’s weird,” Jaemin replied to Kun, from his bed as he tidied everything into place, “We’re almost one month away from finishing our first semester at Daehaekgyo.”

Ten spoke before Lucas could react too loudly. “It gets faster every year.”

“Ah, I can’t imagine that,” said Kun politely. “Do you need any help cleaning anything before your parents get here, Jaemin?”

“You guys can just relax. It’s my room. I can take care of it.”

This weekend at Daehaekgyo was Parents’ Weekend, which meant campus would be crowded with a lot more families would be around than usual. Jaemin’s own parents practically jumped at the opportunity to visit their dear son to see how well he’s adjusted. Being “well-adjusted” included meeting some of their son’s friends who were sitting around the coffee table, all awaiting their arrival. Jaemin was sure that his mom and dad would love Kun and would adore Lucas...Ten, on the other hand, he had some doubts about.

“Parents’ weekend is always so nice,” Ten began, “Older men are more attractive.”

_This was why._

“Please leave my dad out of that statement.”

Ten feigned offense, standing his ground. “In school, you have to break the rules. I can’t believe the boy with the Kai poster over his bed is trying to call me out for knowing what I like.”

“ _Hahaha_ ,” Jaemin fake-laughed. A knock at the door ended their discussion. “I’m coming!” Getting down from his bed, Jaemin quickly checked himself over in the mirror. Yellow turtleneck: wrinkle-free. Teeth: white. Hair:

“It’s even more pink in real life,” exclaimed Jaemin’s mother.

“You look beautiful too, mom,” said Jaemin, embracing her. And it was the truth. Jaemin’s mother had a kind face that showed most in her smile.

His dad joined them, smiling just as brightly as his wife. “I like it. It’s good to see you.”

The embrace was warmly familiar, but not without its fair share of nostalgia. Just two months ago, Jaemin’s parents were dropping him off. It amazed Jaemin how different his life had been since then. He wanted to tell them all about it.

“Mom, dad. These are some of my friends,” he introduced, turning toward the other boys in the dorm. “We’re all in that dance group that I joined called NCT.”

Kun initiated eye contact with each of Jaemin’s parents, smiling as he shook their hands. “Hello, it is very nice to meet you both. My name is Kun.”

“It’s nice to meet you as well, Kun,” said Jaemin’s mom.

Grinning, Lucas followed Kun’s lead. “Hey, I’m Lucas. I hope you eat lots while you’re here!” He took the hand of Jaemin’s dad, adding all on his own, “Your son is so cute!”

“Thank you, Lucas,” he laughed. “We tried really hard.”

This left—

“Ten.” The grey-haired boy strolled up to Jaemin’s parents with a closed-lipped smile.

Jaemin didn’t know where he would take this. “It’s Ten’s second year at Daehaekgyo.”

“Yeah, I’m the mature good influence in Jaemin’s life.”

“Pfffttt,” Kun blurted in disbelief.

“I’m not a liar! It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

If Jaemin’s parents thought otherwise, they gave no indication.

“Likewise to all of you,” said Jaemin’s dad.

“Jaemin,” started his mom, “Would any of your friends care to join us for dinner?”

Lucas’s excitement at the prospect of food made itself heard, only to be stalled by Kun.

“Lucas and I have to start choreographing tonight for our next showcase. We would love to eat with you another night though. You guys can spend time as a family today.”

The taller boy threw his arms at Jaemin, as if he was the parent saying goodbye to his son. “Goodbye, Nana,” he shouted dramatically. “Next time!” He repeated this gesture with Jaemin’s actual parents, albeit, with more delicacy. “Goodbye, Nana’s parents! Fat Kun, lessgetit!”

“That’s not what everyone calls me,” Kun clarified.

“FAT KUN!”

The older boy rolled his eyes, heading out of the door. “Enjoy your day with your family, Jaemin. It was nice to meet you two again.”

“Would you like to join us, Ten?”

“Oh, thank you. I won’t be eating for a little bit though. I have to meet up with my boyfriend later,” he said, matter of factly.

“He must already have some dinner plans,” said Jaemin’s dad.

“Actual—”

“That’s _exactly_ what he’s doing. Wouldn’t want to make him late though!” Jaemin looked at his friend. “Right, Ten?”

“I can stay a _little_ longer,” Ten teased, “But I’ll let you all catch up.” On his way out, he turned around and winked, “I’ll tell you about it later, Jaemin-ah~.”

Jaemin winced, for a variety of reasons. “You’re the worst.”

“You know you love me.”

“Your friends seem nice,” his mom remarked kindly.

“I think I might need to find a new one.”

♡ ♡ ♡

“Three, please,” said Jaemin’s dad to the host, a young, pure-looking boy in a black button-up and matching pants standing in front of endless shelves of emerald green soju bottles.

“Perfect. I’ll have my friend bring you to your seats.”

“Thank you,” Jaemin started, looking for the boy’s name tag, “Jacob.”

Another skinny boy in the same uniform approached the front counter, wearing a pair of thin-rimmed glasses and a dorky smile on his face. “Table for three? Right this way!”

The restaurant’s atmosphere was warm and friendly as groups of students and families dined together. Jaemin hadn’t seen so many adults and little children since being at Daehaekgyo. It felt almost unusual for this sight to seem unusual. Sparse arrangements of ceiling-high bamboo culms served as decorative dividers while wooden walls surrounded its patrons. Their host seated them at a rectangular table next to a window. A small circular grill stood in the center of the table, positioned directly underneath a long coppery vent to capture the smoke.

“Ah, a perfect view of strangers walking,” said their waiter, looking out. “Wel-come to Bamboo House! Can I get you anything to drink besides water?”

“Two Hite Extra Colds and a bottle of Soju,” declared Jaemin’s dad.

His mom clarified their order, “Grapefruit.”

“If you need anything else, just shout for ‘KEVIN,’” playfully mimed the employee, with his hands around his mouth. He proudly gestured to his name tag for emphasis. “I’ll go get your drinks.”

Jaemin took in the sight of his parents sitting across the table from him. Although he’d been at Daehaekgyo for more than half a semester without them, he was glad to be with them now.

“I’ve missed you guys,” said Jaemin. “More than I thought I would’ve, to be honest.”

His mom took his hand in hers as he spoke, comforting her son.

“Your mom and I have missed you too, Jaemin,” said his dad.

“I’m glad that you’re doing well, Nana” his mom added. “And that you’re trying something new too. I don’t think either of us knew that you liked to dance.”

“I didn’t either. I think that I’m finding out a lot more about myself being here. It’s different than what I expected, but not bad.”

“How are classes?”

“Not too bad either, Dad.” Jaemin giggled just a little. “Actually, I really like my Writing 101 teacher. We call him ‘Jisung.’ He’s really young for a professor. Like 28? He’s super cool though. He’s a DJ too.”

Neither of his parents believed it. Jaemin couldn’t blame them. He had the same reaction, at first.

“He’s honestly pretty good at it. He did a set at that arts festival where NCT performed at!”

His mom smiled. “How was that?”

“So much fun, especially getting to do it with all of my friends. I spend most of my time with them at practice and when we’re just hanging out together, so we’ve become a lot closer. Actually getting to perform with them was the best.”

“Well, I’m sure that your dad and I are both really happy that you’ve found something that you really enjoy doing. And that you’ve found some people that you get along with. Kun seems like such a good kid. And Lucas is—”

“Lucas is so handsome,” continued his dad, fully serious. “I feel like he should be a model or something.”

Jaemin and his mom laughed. “That’s what _everyone_ says about Lucas, Dad. I know he would’ve came here with us, if he didn’t already have plans. He eats _all_ the time.”

“Your dad and him would get along then,” said Jaemin’s mom, looking at her husband. She turned her attention back to Jaemin. “We’ll get to know him better soon. Him and all of your other friends.”

“Is there anyone else we haven’t met?”

“Kun, Lucas, and Ten are probably who I hang out the most with. The first two live across the hall from me, so we’re always with each other. Sometimes, we eat with our RA, Johnny, who’s also in NCT. Him and Ten just started dating. Johnny is the one who convinced me to audition for NCT! Otherwise,” Jaemin stopped to think. “Well, there is…”

He looked out the window, as one does when they’re thinking about something or someone else. It’d been over a month since he actually talked to Jeno. They’d barely said a word to each other, even when they were at practice—not like Jaemin didn’t want to say something. He just didn’t know how to say _anything_ to Jeno anymore. Still, he missed him, not because he was a boy that Jaemin had feelings for, but his best friend, though he didn’t admit it. Jaemin could imagine the way that Jeno’s eyes smiled whenever they laughed together and the way that his arms felt around Jaemin’s shoulders and the way that Jeno would act when he was confused or surpri—

“Jaemin,” his dad interrupted. “Do you know that boy staring at you outside?”

Jaemin could see how Jeno flinched from the other side of the window, his lips forming into a “huh.”

“I—I do.”

“Well, we should say ‘hi’ then!”

“Oh, no, I’m sure he’s on his way somewhere,” reasoned Jaemin as his dad waved to Jeno to come in.

_Jeno can’t say “no.”_

“We’d love to meet another one of your friends, Nana,” said his mom. “Oh! Where did he go off to?”

“He doesn’t have a lot of time lately.” _For me._ “I told you he’s probably busy.”

“Hello, my name is Lee Jeno. It’s nice to meet you.”

_Shit._

“Why, he’s adorable!”

“Thank you very much,” said Kevin, their water, cutting them off with their drinks. “Sorry, that took so long. They were playing Beyoncé at the register. Oh! And you have four now?”

Jaemin’s dad answered before Jaemin could, “Yes, we do.”

“Are you _sure_ , Dad?”

“Of course he is, Nana,” said his mom.

The younger boy tried to plead to Jeno with his eyes to leave, who began to sit down with the rest of Jaemin’s family, unable to say “no,” as always.

“Well, it’s a party now,” offered Kevin enthusiastically. “I can take your order too, sir, if you’re ready.”

“We’ll do one order of the marinated short rib and one order of the pork belly, please.”

“Per-fect. I’ll let the chefs know and bring out the banchan and rice in a little bit for you. Can I get a ‘yas?’”

_Absolutely not, Kevin._

“Yas!”

Jaemin’s parents were feeling it more than he was.

Next to him, Jeno sat in a bright blue sweater. The collar of his white shirt poked out from the top. It was like he was somehow prepared to meet Jaemin’s parents. _Stop that._ Suddenly, Jaemin became more aware of his own appearance, fixing his hair at the table. Neither of them had said anything to one another since Jeno entered.

“So, Jeno,” his mom started. “How did you two meet?”

“We met, uhh,” Jeno paused, turning towards Jaemin for help, or maybe it was permission? “We met on the first day that Jaemin came to Daehaekgyo at this...uh, _information session_ for new students. I got called on as a volunteer in front of the whole lecture hall, which was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. After that though…”

It seemed like Jeno was waiting for Jaemin to say something next, except just as Jaemin’s parents were, the boy was too busy listening to respond. Jeno was right. The day that his parents dropped him off was the day that he met Jeno—he was the first friend that Jaemin made on campus. It hurt to think that they didn’t talk as much anymore.

“I thought he seemed nice,” Jaemin finally replied, telling only the necessary part of the truth. “So I went up to him and we just started talking and then he invited me to this club fair that was going on that was called KCon.”

“I wouldn’t have tried out for NCT, if it weren’t for Jaemin.”

“He didn’t show up to auditions on time though.”

Jeno playfully shoved Jaemin to the side. “To be honest, I was busy trying to help this drunk girl get home safely.”

“You _what_?!”

By the time that Jeno had finished retelling his story about JinSoul’s vomit, the food had arrived. Surrounded by sweet fishcakes, seasoned soybean sprouts, and spicy-sour kimchi, the table became enveloped in richly aromatic color as Jaemin’s dad started to put meat on the grill. Jaemin watched smoke rise to the top of the vent, from the char of the meat cooking. This was probably the closest thing that Jaemin had to a home-cooked meal that he had since September—being with his family was a lovely addition.

In between spoons of rice, Jaemin’s mom asked, “If Jeno didn’t make it to auditions then, when did you find out that you were both in NCT?”

For the first time that day, Jaemin and Jeno looked at each other, _actually_ looking at each other in the eyes. Of course, they both knew the answer. Although each boy was too shy to figure out exactly how to say it to Jaemin’s parents and apparently, too shy to keep looking each other in the eyes.

“Jaemin-ah, do you want to tell them?”

All of Jaemin’s senses seemed to stop working other than his hearing.

“It was a surprise,” managed Jaemin, eventually. “I didn’t think I would see him again.” Even though it wasn’t the first time Jaemin told someone else about this night, his words felt different, regarding the current state of Jaemin and Jeno’s relationship, or lack thereof; he was being honest. “I was really happy to see him again.”

“I wanted to see you again,” Jeno affirmed, his voice serious but soft as he looked at Jaemin for another time.

“Me too.”

Jaemin wasn’t sure if they were talking about the past or the present anymore.

Under the table, Jeno gently took Jaemin’s hand into his, a silent, but meaningful gesture. Jaemin jerked away slightly at first. Then he kept it there. It had been too long, but not long enough for him to stop missing the other boy beside him.

“Are you guys together?”

Kevin the waiter’s smiling face made Jaemin jerk away completely.

“Oh, no, no, no,” Jaemin panicked. “We’re not _together_ , well, not _together_ together in _that_ kinda way.”

Jeno, horrified, also searched for an excuse. “Yeah, we’re just uh...together...friends.”

Kevin just tilted his head more, blinking once, then twice, amused for some reason. He turned to the other side of the table, saying to Jaemin’s parents, “Are you guys together...on one bill?”

_I’m never coming here again._

♡ ♡ ♡

“I can drop you off at your dorm, if you want, Jeno,” said Jaemin’s dad as they approached Dansim Hall. “It’s a bit of a walk, isn’t it?”

“I’ll be alright,” Jeno replied kindly. “Thank you for the offer though, Mr. Na. I appreciate it.”

“Jeno, you don’t have to be so nice. I’ll take you right now,” he continued, waving his keys. “I’ll meet you inside soon, Nana.”

Part of Jeno seemed almost disappointed, but his eyes didn’t betray him. Instead, they kept smiling with his lips. “Thank you both very much for the dinner.” He waved at Jaemin’s mom, saying, “It was a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Na. I hope you have a safe trip home.” Then he gave one last look at Jaemin before following Jaemin’s dad to their car, though Jaemin could’ve sworn that Jeno’s gaze lingered for a heartbeat longer than it did for Jaemin’s family. “Goodnight, Jaemin-ah.”

“Goodnight, Jeno.”

Jaemin watched his dad and Jeno walk away together, underneath the setting sun that arrived earlier and earlier as winter approached Daehaekgyo. Soon, 6 pm would yield pitch black darkness that was currently reserved for autumn’s nights. Jaemin would make sure to enjoy the light for as long as he could.

“I don’t think it ever really gets easier dropping you off at school,” declared Jaemin’s mom, entering her son’s dorm.

Jaemin closed the door behind him. “I don’t think it gets easier saying goodbye to you either, Mom.”

“I was so worried when your dad and I left after helping you move in during September. It’s the first time that we’ve been away from you for so long,” she sniffled.

“Mom.”

For the second time that day, Jaemin hugged his mother tightly, running his hand along her back to keep her from crying. Her hands moved to his face, which she held in front of her.”

“You’re growing up so well, Jaemin. I mean it. Your dad and I are so proud of you.”

“I know you are.”

“I know that you’re not alone here either. Even though we may not be here, you have people that care about you too.” While her hands dropped, a lighthearted kind of sniffle broke through.

“When were you going to tell me about Jeno, Nana?”

Now, Jaemin’s hands went to cover his face. “Ah, that’s a long story. We haven’t talked since our NCT performance until today at dinner.”

“What happened?”

“I,” said Jaemin, feeling his voice wavering as he went, “I told Jeno that I have feelings for him.”

“ _Have_?”

“No, _had_. Have.” He ran his hands through his hair next, in confusion. “I don’t know. I think have—I still have feelings for him. Even though I should just be focusing on myself and moving on and not needing him anymore because he told me that he’s not good enough for me.”

Jaemin’s mom took his hands. The room was quiet, except for this conversation occurring between a mother and her child. “Do you think he believes that?”

“I don’t know.”

“Do you believe that?”

“I don’t know.”

Softly, she wiped the single tear threatening to fall out of Jaemin’s eye. “Jaemin, my son. You deserve all of the love in the world, more than Jeno or me or your dad could give you. But you have to believe that.”

“I miss him though.”

His mom looked him in the eyes. “Of course you do—he’s your best friend. That doesn’t make you any less of a person because you want him in your life. Knowing that you are deserving of love does not mean that need to move on from the ones who you do love. It means knowing that you’ll be okay when the timing isn’t right. But it also means keeping yourself open to love from others and giving yourself to others when you feel that you are both capable of receiving that.”

Moments passed before either of them had said anything else. Jaemin was trying to process everything that his mom had just said to him. _You are deserving of love_ , he repeated. _You are deserving of love._ His hands tightened their grasp around hers. _You are deserving of love._

Inside his dorm, with no one else than Kai watching over them, it was times like these that reminded Jaemin of his entire life. Teary-eyed, in his mom’s arms, he was both her little child and a young adult, still figuring things out. From the window, the day’s final rays of sunlight bathed the room in warmth as the pair embraced, with Jaemin’s head tucked safely in her shoulder. His mom’s love to him was pure, automatic, unconditional.

It was a love that Jaemin wanted to give to himself, as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'm sorry that it's been awhile since I've updated The new year has been a little rough on me, but I'm continuing to try to find inspiration for everything that I do instead of rushing to put out something really shitty. I've been working on this specific chapter for a few weeks now. Hopefully, since it's the longest chapter that I've written (yet?!), this will make up for some lost time. Strangely enough, this chapter might be the most personal to me, especially in regards to my life right now. I hope y'all will really enjoy it.  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> (P.S. Maybe Kun, Lucas, and Ten couldn't make it to dinner because they were preparing for WayV's debut?! And maybe Ten was just saying goodbye to Johnny first lmao...lessgetit! Also, stan The Boyz! I ♡ Kevin, but there's 11 more members with him!)  
> ♡ ONLY 3 CHAPTERS LEFT?! ♡


	14. Timing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guide:  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

******♡ Jeno ♡**

 

“Just one more set, Jeno,” said Jaehyun, encouragingly. “You got this.”

Jeno didn’t doubt that he  _ could  _ do this. He didn’t  _ want _ to finish, which he kept to himself, breathing heavily as he continued to raise the barbell above him. The metal felt abrasive against his hands, sweat threatened to drip from his forehead into his eyes, and honestly, he was really fuc—

“Done.”

The bar dropped with a crash from Jeno’s hands.

The older boy stood on his side and smiled. “You’re going up every time, Jeno.” Jaehyun’s forehead was glistening too after the day’s workout, but he looked like he could keep going, if he wanted to. “Let’s head out.”

♡ ♡ ♡

Truthfully, Jeno didn’t have much experience in clothes shopping for himself, not that he thought he dressed poorly, by any means. Clothes, like going to the gym, were definitely never a priority for him until he came to Daehaekgyo. 

Jaehyun laughed lightly. “It’s because you’re already cute. And your mom bought clothes for you.” His friend tucked his hands into the pockets of his pants.

“Hey, I don’t need you to pick things out for me.”

“Yeah, those arms will fill out everything anyway,” he teased again.

Clarification: clothes, like going to the gym, were definitely never a priority for him until he came to Daehaekgyo  _ and  _ met Jaehyun. It was always nice to spend time with him, especially to have someone there for him who knew what it was like to be a new student on campus. Not only was Jaehyun another member of NCT, but he was one of Jeno’s best friends. He was almost like an older brother to him, helping to push him out of his comfort zone ever since he auditioned for their group, even if that included just shopping for clothes.

Although there was no shortage of fashionable people walking about at the university, Daehaekgyo’s fashion district was like another world. Not a trace of campus life could be found in sight as multiple-story store buildings replaced academic complexes. Jeno adjusted his glasses. In his white tank top and black jeans, he felt out of place. The wind blew underneath his jacket as if it recognized this too.

“How far did we walk from campus?”

“Enough.” Jaehyun pointed at the store in front of them. “Let’s go in!”

Inside, the store was all modern, with white tiles and walls alike. Multiple neon words hung on the interior, encouraging hopeful customers with pre-designed messages. Racks on racks were mindfully scattered about, unlike the uniform carelessness that all of the employees seemed to possess despite a lack of an actual uniform to wear. A blonde girl in a matching plaid blazer and skirt looked over at them as she folded clothes.

“Hello, my name is Yeeun. Let me know if you need any help finding anything,” she said, looking the boys up and down. “There’s a sale right now on high heels and earrings, in case you’re interested.”

“Thank you,” Jeno answered.

“We’ll just take a look around first. Thank you,” replied Jaehyun, more assertively than his friend.

Yeeun nodded, making the barrettes in her bob shine in the fluorescent lighting. “Mhm.”

Jaehyun turned to the younger boy now. “Anything you’re shopping for, Jeno? 

“Maybe you should tell me.”

“The men’s section is on the second floor,” offered Yeeun. “I’ll let some associates know to help you once you’re up there.”

The boys bowed their heads to her before exchanging a look at the escalator and each other.

“We go up.”

While on the escalator, Jeno looked across the store, spying at succulents and sporty utility pants. At the top, the boys were greeted with a large neon “2” in a box, in case they misunderstood which level of the store they were on. A similarly hard-to-miss sign hung over the men’s section, blocked by college-aged girls running around with their arms linked, some of whom made brief glances at Jeno and Jaehyun. Jaehyun pushed his hair back into the oversized black headband that he wore to the gym, making eye contact with the ones that walked past him.

“Flirt.”

Jaehyun disagreed. “Fan-service.”

Jeno disagreed.

“Don’t think about it too much,” advised Jaehyun, leaning over the jeans display on the marble table. “Find some things you think you might like and try them on. I need to find some new shirts to wear. I’m just getting...too...big,” he continued, flexing.

A little hesitantly, Jeno began to add things to try on into the crook of his arm. A white-collared sweater sectioned into blue, yellow, and grey caught his eye. Three white stripes raced down the shoulders to the elbows of the sleeves, giving it an athletic feeling. Jeno wanted to pick things that stood out to him for different reasons. A puffy mint cardigan:  _ Cute and soft _ . A red and black sweater vest:  _ Smart, a little formal _ . A crisp, sleeveless button-up:  _ Maybe to show-off, just a bit _ . He smiled slightly to himself. With his collection starting to weigh him down, Jeno made his way to the fitting rooms, where two blondes were discussing.

_ Is every employee here blonde? _

“What are you doing after your shift ends?”

“I have to study for my linear algebra exam on Monday, so I can’t go out at all this weekend, KimLip.”

The silvery ponytailed one, presumably KimLip, crossed her arms. “I wouldn’t if Chuu weren’t making me. I have to take care of her th—.” Uncrossing, she noticed Jeno at the entrance. “Hello, how many items do you have?”

“Ah, 10,” he counted, prompting the other blonde in the blue baseball cap to turn around, bewildered.

“Jeno?!”

“You got my name right!”

JinSoul threw herself at Jeno with as much force as the first time they ran into each other, but nowhere near as drunkenly as she had been then. Her big eyes shined as did her grin.

“I’m surprised I didn’t forget.” JinSoul turned to her co-worker, explaining excitedly, “This is the boy that saved me during welcome week.”

“You said that his name was Jinyou—”

“What are you shopping for, Jeno?”

“He’s trying to impress a boy,” said Jaehyun, joining the group of three before Jeno himself could answer.

JinSoul’s jaw dropped, “ _ Really?! _ ”

“ _ Huh? _ ” Jeno started tripping over his words. “No, no, no, I just wanted to try something new, that’s all.”

KimLip waved a key in the air. “Whenever you’re ready.”

“Show us when you’re finished trying each thing on,” Jaehyun encouraged, to JinSoul’s approval. Next to each other, the two looked like they could almost be Jeno’s parents, patiently waiting for their kid. It was the best kind of embarrassment—embarrassing, yet full of love.

Inside the dressing room were four-walls of peachy pink panels while a long bronze mirror faced the door. Jeno stared at himself. For some reason, the sight felt familiar to him. His own reflection was not something that he spent too much time looking at. He hung up his selection of clothes on the rack on the wall beside him, removing his jacket. The sight of his arms coming out of his tank top made him feel bashful, partly because he was pleased with what he saw.

Maybe it was because he had been working out or eating better or just feeling better in general, but he liked the way that the clothes he picked out looked on him, or more accurately, he liked the way that he looked in them. Jeno had just pulled the multicolored sweater over his torso when he heard knocks on the door.

“Yes?”

JinSoul stood at the doorway, some clothes in her hands. “I know you said you wanted to try something new, so I picked something out for you.” She pushed the unassembled outfit towards him. “I think you’ll look great in this.”

“Ah, I’ll come out when I’m done.”

_ What do we have here? _

 

JinSoul’s choices were fairly simple: a pair of ripped, light wash jeans, a collared, cream-colored jacket, and a white button-up shirt. Tucked inside the jacket was also a long ribbon, off-white in with black diamonds running across the fabric, and a belt. Jeno ran his hand on the shirt fabric, deciding it was thick enough that he wouldn’t need to wear another shirt underneath. He lifted his top over his shoulders, feeling the air conditioning on his bare skin. If just looking at his arms made him shy, this made him want to put the shirt back on again except he didn’t. He kept looking at his body, trying to trace the points in time at which his progress started to show itself in the lines and curves of his torso. The boy in the mirror was stronger and healthier and more attractive than he remembered. 

He looked good.

The buttons of his shirt seemed to put themselves together, as if it was ready to be worn by him. His pants fit him perfectly and his jacket did the same. By the time that Jeno was adjusting the ribbon under his collar, he couldn’t stop smiling. Even the “So cute!” mounted in the corner of the room seemed to agree. He  _ did _ look good.

He looked happy.

“SO CUTE,” said JinSoul.

“Please date me, Jeno,” play-begged his friend.

Jeno didn’t try to stop them, turning around to give them the full view as they cheered him on.

“Jeno-oppa~,” joked Jaehyun, dragging out the last syllable. “So sexy, Jeno.” Jaehyun looked him up and down, licking his lips and nodding.

“Okay, stop it, dude,” said Jeno, although he wasn’t mad at all.

JinSoul nodded, “I think this is the best one.”

“I agree.”

“What else do you think you’re going to get?”

In all honesty, Jeno had forgot about his budget—well, lack thereof, until Jaehyun reminded him. Looking this good didn’t mean he could suddenly afford looking this good. “I’ll have to take another look.”

“I got it,” JinSoul announced.

“Huh? No, I can pay for myself, JinSoul,” Jeno objected, politely. “You don’t have to do anything for me. There’s a lot that I have to go through, first. I don’t need all of it.”

“Did you like it all?”

“Well—”

“I got it.”

“I’ll pay you back later then,” he suggested as a compromise.

JinSoul laid a hand on Jeno’s shoulder. “Jeno, if you try to pay me back, I will block you. I have my discount, anyway. This is for Welcome Week. Just take it.”

Jeno instinctively hugged her—this seemed like it was starting to be a thing between them. “Thank you, JinSoul.”

“Let’s go check out, okay?”  
“After you, Jeno,” Jaehyun prompted.

Up at the register, Jeno watched as JinSoul scanned through his items, putting them into sky blue bags. With one  _ click _ , the value on the monitor went to 0.00 in total.

“Do you need the receipt?” JinSoul giggled.

“I’ll be alright,” replied Jeno. “Thank you, again.”

“Take care, Jeno! I’ll see you soon.”

As the boys left, Jeno still felt just a little wrong accepting JinSoul’s gesture when his phone screen lit up with a message from a name that he was happy to see.

Nudging him, Jaehyun asked, “I’m taking you home now, right?”

Jeno read the text to himself, looking up at Jaehyun, whose eyes told Jeno he knew what he was about to say.

“Actually…”

♡ ♡ ♡

**Jaemin-ah~:** hey, are u doing anything later tonight?

 

**Jeno:** I’m with Jaehyun rn, but I don’t think we have anything else planned

 

**Jeno:** what’s up?

 

**Jaemin-ah~:** do u want to come over later?

 

**Jaemin-ah~:** only if u aren’t busy

 

**Jaemin-ah~:** we can order food maybe and catch up

 

**Jeno** : I would love to, Jaemin-ah

 

**Jeno:** are you home right now?

 

**Jeno:** I can have Jaehyun drop me off, if you want

 

**Jaemin-ah~:** okay

 

**Jaemin-ah~:** text me when u get here 

 

**Jaemin-ah~:** see u soon ♡

 

**Jeno:** [...]

“What are you guys doing tonight?” Jaehyun looked over at Jeno’s phone, from the driver’s seat. His smirk said that his question was merely a courtesy. The way that he took his hand off the wheel to run through his hair said that he just wanted Jeno to say it too.

“We’re just going to catch up,” said Jeno, still shy whenever it came to Jaemin and him. “It’s been a long time since we’ve hung out just like this.”

“Ah.”

The conversation passed like the buildings that they drove by as the Daehaekgyo campus came into view again. It could’ve been the excitement from the day that he’d been having so far, but Jeno felt like he was looking forward more to seeing Jaemin than he had been to go buy new clothes. Well, he knew that for sure. He wouldn’t say it to Jaehyun though.

“I’m happy that we’re starting to be good friends again.”

“Is that all you want?”

“I don’t want to rush into anything so soon. I missed just being his friend.”

“I’m sure he’s missed you too.”

Towards Jaemin’s residence hall, the dansim flowers that signalled their destination were fading away while the autumn weather grew into winter. The last time Jeno was here was before Seoul’d Out. The blooms were more abundant then. He wanted to stay after having dinner with Jaemin’s family, but the timing didn’t seem to be right. Timing was something he thought a lot about when it came to Jaemin.

**Jeno:** here, Jaemin-ah

 

Instead of typing his response, Jeno’s friend opened up the door, standing halfway in the entrance. In the sunset’s glow, he was golden—his warm brown eyes and tan skin and just  _ all _ of him. Jaemin never had to try. In his crewneck tee and sweatpants, his smile was all he needed. He waved sweetly to the boys in the car.

“Don’t have too much fun, Jeno,” advised Jaehyun.

“Goodbye, Jaehyun.”

Jeno’s chauffeur for the day drove away, leaving Jeno and Jaemin to themselves. Being around Jaemin was a rush that Jeno was both so familiar with yet never entirely used to. He liked it.

“Wow,” said Jaemin, upon notice of the bags that Jeno carried with him. “Did you buy something for me too?”

“Cleaning up vomit pays off,” he joked. “I wanted to pay myself, but JinSoul said she’d block me if I tried.”

“You’re too nice.”

“I know.”

The way to Jaemin’s room was vaguely memorable but the room itself was virtually the same, albeit a little messier than the last time that Jeno had stayed over. The blanket on Jaemin’s bed brushed the carpet while empty bottles of chocolate milk claimed their space on the coffee table—signs of a student’s life. Jaemin tossed Jeno a fresh bottle from his fridge before sitting down on the futon.

“How was your day, Jaemin-ah?”

“I think I’m still catching up on sleep from midterms. I haven’t even left Dansim today.”

“You should sleep more.”

Jaemin tilted his head. “Don’t worry about me.”

“I don’t want you to be too tired.”

“I’m not.” Jeno sat down beside him. “Not anymore.”

They sat close enough to each other that Jeno could see Jaemin lick the milk off of his lips. He looked soft and sleepy, like he had literally just woken up. Stray strands of his hair poked up unevenly at the back of his head. Jeno wanted to reach out and touch them.

“Have you had dinner yet, Jeno?”

“Not yet.” He swallowed a small amount. “Are you hungry?”

Jaemin nodded, pouting slightly. “A little.”

“Ann-Yum?”

“Lessgetit.”

Nobody said it quite like Jaemin did.

“One medium combo, half-and-half. Kimchi fries. And tteokbokki?”

Jaemin nodded again while Jeno repeated their order over the phone.

“Perfect, thank you very much,” he said, ending the call. “They said about 30-45 minutes.”

“Tell me about your day now.”

“Well, I went to work out with Jaehyun.”

“Are you as fit as he is now?”

Jeno shook his head humbly. “I think it’ll take a lot of time to get there.”

“I think you look good right now.” His voice sounded pure and honest. Hearing this from Jaemin made Jeno warm. “Will you show me what you bought?”

“All of it?”

“We have time. I want to see.”

As if there was a way Jeno could’ve resisted, he pulled out the blue sweater he had picked out from one of the bags beside the futon, unfolding the shirt on his lap. He was thankful for JinSoul’s offer, though he knew he would’ve bought this one for sure.

“No.”

“Huh?”

“I want to see you wear them,” Jaemin whined.

Jeno sighed, “Only for you.”

Reaching to his head, Jeno pulled down his sweater, over his shoulders, down his torso, until it fell at his hips. He glanced over at the mirror next to Jaemin’s closet. A part of him was surprised that he still liked how he looked in it now. In the reflection, he could see his friend on the futon, watching him attentively.

“What do you think, Jaemin-ah?”

His eyes were fixed on Jeno. “Did you pick this out yourself?”

“Do you like it?”

“You look good in it.” 

Jeno couldn’t stop his face from smiling. “Thank you.”

“Show me more!”

Jaemin’s excitement was good encouragement for Jeno. As he took off his new shirt, he felt his top underneath raise, exposing his stomach until it felt down, though he tried to speed up this process in front of the other boy. His eyes were covered by his clothes, so he wasn’t aware of what Jaemin’s reaction was or if he had noticed...or if he had  _ wanted  _ him to notice. The process went on like this for awhile; Jeno tried on his clothes for the second time that day and Jaemin watched, offering his commentary on each piece. Jeno took mental note of the things that Jaemin seemed to especially enjoy—these things were cute, like the minty cardigan he was wearing now.  _ So, he likes cut— _

“Oh, the food is here,” Jeno announced, interrupted by his phone ringer.

“I can go get it, since you ordered,” replied Jaemin. “You can stay here and look cute. Is this your last outfit?”

“Ah, yes. I’ll just change into my old clothes while you’re gone.”

“Okay! I’ll be right back,” he promised. He was already out the door before Jeno could respond. He let his sleeves fall around his wrists, proceeding to fold the garment neatly into its respective bag once he had taken it off. Jeno’s eyes went to the bag of clothes left untouched since arriving to Dansim, which contained the clothes that JinSoul had picked out for him. _I’m going to save that for something special_. For Jaemin, he didn’t mind having to put everything on and then back again, but he decided he wouldn’t show him just everything yet.  
“Let’s eat,” said Jaemin, returning with two plastic bags in hand.

Atop Jaemin’s coffee table, the boys laid out their dinner, reminiscent of the food that they ordered with the other NCT members when they had dined in at the restaurant. This meal was between only the two of them. The first sweet and spicy bite of crispy chicken confirmed Jeno’s thoughts that take-out didn’t mean the food tasted any worse. 

“How is it?”

“ _ So  _ good.” Jaemin used his left hand to wipe the orangey sauce on his mouth while his right was occupied, holding a rice cake in the middle of his chopsticks. 

“I think eating like this makes me remember that we’re in college,” said Jeno.

“Because we don’t know how to cook?”

“A little bit. It reminds me that we’re kind of on our own now.”

“Yeah,” said Jaemin, “I think I’m getting better at realizing that.”

“What do you mean?”

The pink-haired boy waited to answer after he finished chewing. “I think I’ve felt kind of lonely this semester—not because I haven’t met any friends or found anything to do or anything like that. Something just felt  _ off _ for awhile...and it was hard because I didn’t know  _ why _ . I feel like I got in the way of me being as happy as I could’ve been, if that makes sense.” His eyes met Jeno’s, who merely nodded to indicate that he was very much so listening to every word. “I feel like I didn’t put myself first. Even though I had people to spend time with and things that kept me busy, sometimes it seemed like I was doing those things because I  _ had  _ to, not because I  _ wanted  _ to. It’s something that I’ve been trying to change lately.” He picked up another rice cake. “But I think I know more about myself and what I want now. And I’m figuring out more everyday.”

His words reminded Jeno of the conversation he had with Jaehyun during Halloweekend, upstairs at the Nu Chi Tau house. Jeno had felt the same way himself. He didn’t know that Jaemin did too.

“I wish I would’ve known that you’ve been feeling like this,” he began, finally. “I think it would’ve helped to know that there was someone else that you knew who was going through the same thing.”

“I don’t think I even realized this about myself until recently. It’s okay.”

“You seem happier now.”

“You do too.”

“I’ve missed you, Jaemin.”

It was only moments before Jeno opened his mouth—mere seconds that felt like lifetimes and lifetimes that he had spent wanting to say this to Jaemin. Neither of them were eating then. All they did was just look at each other in silence. Jeno considered whether or not he wanted to say something else, but he had said what he longed to tell the other boy for so long. He didn’t regret it.

“I’ve missed you too.”

Two sets of brown eyes stayed fixed on each other. The distance between them over the past months seemed to close with Jaemin’s next words to Jeno:

“Do you want to spend the night?”

“Do you want me t—.” Jeno cut himself off. He knew better, “Yes, I would.”

His smile was the sweetest part of their dinner.

“Okay,” Jaemin continued, moving from his rice cake to a fry. “Let’s finish eating then. I have a lot to tell you.”

“Tell me everything.”

“Well, my parents seem to like you,” he laughed.

“Really?”

“They bring you up every time they call, ever since parents’ weekend. They think you’re cute.”

_ Noted. _

“Really?”

“Yeah,” said Jaemin, looking off into space like he was trying to remember something. “My dad thinks Lucas is cuter though.”

“Hey.”

He stuck his tongue out and laughed. “I’m just telling you what he thinks.”

“What do you think?”

For maybe the first time, Jaemin was the one flustered by Jeno. “I think you’re cuter.”

“Wow,” Jeno teased.

“Don’t let it get to you.”

“What else did they say about me?”

“I told them that you were coming over today. They’re happy that we’re hanging out again. I tell them a lot about you.”

“Do you tell them that you think I’m cute too?”

“I don’t have to eat with you, y’know,” he said quickly.

“Awh, Jaemin-ahhhhhh,” Jeno whimpered, shaking the other boy by the shoulder. “Please eat with me.”

Jaemin shook his head. They playfully went back and forth like this for a bit, with Jeno holding on to Jaemin as he pushed back against his chest. At one point, either Jeno played too hard or Jaemin didn’t play hard enough when they were suddenly face to face, inches away from each other. Instinctively, Jeno’s gaze went to Jaemin’s lips, then his eyes, and back to his lips, pink and moving away as soon as they were there, so close to his.

“Let’s clean up,” said Jaemin, as if nothing had happened.

“Of course.”

Jeno could’ve sworn that Jaemin had looked at his lips too.

Together, they closed lids of boxes for leftovers and tossed used napkins and savored last bites for now, all the while avoiding what passed between them.  _ Too soon, right?  _ The timing was unclear to Jeno. Yes, it was the first night he’d be staying over at Dansim since that first NCT performance about two months ago, but did that break mean they had to start over? Was it even a break? Either way, his feelings hadn’t changed. He ran over what Jaemin told him about himself:  _ “But I think I know more about myself and what I want now.” _

_ “And I’m figuring out more everyday.”  _

“I’m going to the bathroom to start getting ready for bed,” Jaemin interrupted, a small pink shower caddy in his hand. He grabbed something small from its contents and threw it to Jeno: a toothbrush. “My mom thought I should have some around, just in case.”

“I’ll change first.”

“I’ll give you my housing key when I’m back.”

While Jaemin left, Jeno changed into a plain, muted-pink t-shirt, and a pair of grey sweatpants, both from today’s purchases. He laid down on the futon with a sigh. He was more tired than he thought. Still, he was content. It had been a nice day for him.

The door lock  _ click _ -ed open and in came Jaemin, wearing a fluffy bubblegum-colored headband on top of his head. His face looked clean and dewy. He was

“So cute.”

“You like it?” Jaemin grinned widely, playing with the big bow in the middle of the headband. “I have one for you too.” He walked over to his drawers and opened the top one, procuring a matching headband in white. This, along with his housing key, was tossed over to Jeno, much like the toothbrush.

“Thank you.”

Jaemin cocked his head at him. “I think I look better in it.”

“I’m walking away now,” he responded, jokingly hurt.

The bathroom was relatively empty, save for a tall boy, wrapped in a towel, and another bespectacled student shaving...and some poor resident in a stall that was thankfully far from the sinks. Jeno looked rather silly with the headband on, once he looked into the mirror. It was overly cutesy and over-sized in general, though that was likely the point. Regardless, it served him well. The best he could get from the university’s water was  _ slightly _ less than freezing as it made contact with his skin. He reminded himself to thank his friend for letting him borrow his things.

“Jaemin?”

“I’m awake,” he answered from on top of the futon. Although he was sprawled out, at some point, he had prepared a bed for Jeno with blankets and pillows that he was using now.

“Ah, thank you,” said Jeno. “You didn’t have to do this, if you were too tired, Jaemin-ah.”

His friend rolled over on the spare pillow to face him. “I’m having you over! And I’m not tired. I just don’t want to get up right now.” He scooted towards the wall. “You can come too.”

“Okay.” Jeno did as he was told, laying next to Jaemin in the same spot where they had been eating not too long ago. Dim rays came from the lamp on Jaemin’s desk at the other side of the room. There was enough light for Jeno to look at Jaemin’s face beside him.

“Jeno?”

“Huh?”

“Do you remember the last time you spent the night?”

“You mean, ‘booty jjiage?’”

Jaemin’s laughter was adorable. “I told you that I was happy to have met you.”

“I remember.”

“It’s still true.” He adjusted his arms underneath the pillow. Jeno could see that his eyelids were getting heavier. Each time Jaemin blinked, he seemed to be getting more tired. His hair was messier now and his voice became softer and he was the cutest boy Jeno had ever met. He rolled towards the wall.

“I really missed you, Jaemin-ah.”

Jeno waited for a response, for seconds, and then minutes. Then came the gentle noises of Jaemin breathing.  _ He’s asleep _ . For awhile, Jeno just laid there. So much reminded him of that first night that he stayed over in Jaemin’s dorm. Then, Jaemin had fallen asleep before him too. With Jaemin, it seemed to be all about timing—something that Jeno had trouble figuring out exactly how to handle. Jeno never knew when it was the  _ right  _ time, or if that was something that actually existed. He tended to be late. But he had lots of time since that night here, time which he wished he had been able to spend with Jaemin rather than being alone. Being alone was time that let him learn about himself though. It was time that he needed. It was time that was for the better. And now, they were simply catching up on time, together. He wondered if he would ever have the time to just say the words that he had wanted to say that night and the night of the NCT retreat and the first day that they met:

“I like you.”

“W- _ what _ ?”

Jaemin jolted around to face him, rapidly regaining consciousness. His voice was the opposite of the calm, sleepy tone he used before he apparently,  _ didn’t _ fall asleep.

“Weren’t you sleeping?” Jeno’s voice wavered too, not so brave now that he knew he had been heard.

“Almost.” Jaemin’s head moved closer to his on the pillow they were both laying down on “Jeno, what did you just say?”

Panic set in. “Huh?”

“Jeno.”

“I—I didn’t sa–.”  _ No.  _ “I like you.”

“What?”

Jeno was sure that Jaemin had heard him, but he’d say it again and again until he received a response. “Jaemin-ah. I like you.” His voice still shook in his delivery. “I have ever since we met.”

Jaemin’s big brown eyes got bigger, staring at the older boy, almost studying his expression. “Why are you telling me this now?”

Jeno wanted to say that he didn’t mean for him to hear, however, that would’ve been a lie. Part of him wanted Jaemin to hear him, tonight and all those nights ago. He wanted to tell him at barbecue and on the tennis court and after they performed at Seoul’d Out but he couldn’t because of the...

“Timing,” he said, out loud. “I’ve always wanted to tell you how I felt. It just never felt like the right time because...I didn’t think that I was enough for you,” he admitted. The sensation of being choked up by his words arose. “You’re my best friend and I care about you more than anyone that I’ve met since coming here...I cared more about you than I did about myself. I wanted to tell you that I felt the same way after our performance. It wasn’t somehow the timing’s fault. It was because I wasn’t ready. And now, I think that I am. And I want to be with y–.”

Even all the time that Jeno could’ve spent preparing for this moment couldn’t have given him an idea of how this would actually be. Jaemin’s lips on his were soft and awkward and he wanted more. His arm went around Jaemin, pulling him closer to him until they were against each other. The other arm made it to the back of Jaemin’s head as he gently caressed strands of Jaemin’s hair with his fingers. He felt Jaemin curiously reach for his shoulders. Jeno’s heart pounded more and more quickly after each new motion. Warmth flooded his body from his lips to his chest. Their first kiss was sloppy and imperfect, yet in this instance, it couldn’t have been any better. 

“Jaemin-ah, go on a date with me.”

Jaemin’s eyes were glittering with tears that may have fallen at any moment from anticipation. Still, his smile shined brighter. “When?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Yes.” 

The way Jeno was grinning now made his cheeks ache. “It’s a date.”

“A date.”

“Jaemin-ah.”

“Yes?”

Jeno’s voice went completely serious, “I was joking.”

“ _ You wha–” _

He interrupted Jaemin with another kiss, slower than the first had been. Jeno wanted to take his time with Jaemin, for as long as he could. Their feet intertwined underneath the single blanket they shared between them. Jaemin tried to stifle his sudden laughter without great success. He put his hands over his face in embarrassment.

“Jeno,” Jaemin whispered.

“Huh?”

“How am I supposed to sleep now?”

Jeno just stared at him. “Like this.” He kissed Jaemin once more on the cheek, lightly prodding him onto his side so he faced the wall. He wrapped his arms around Jaemin’s waist and stayed there. They both stayed there, fitting perfectly in each other.

“Good night, Jaemin-ah.”

“Good night, Jeno.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: I may or may not be illiterate and forgot I had Jaemin dye his hair pink, so that continuity error has been fixed ;))
> 
> I think it's funny that this chapter is about timing because holy fuck, it's been almost three entire months since I've last updated this story! Timing has not given me the most time to devote to this fic and for that, I apologize. Sophomore year of undergrad has been the absolute worst for me, yet full of change that will hopefully prove to be positive. I wish that everything in life happened at the time that you'd like it to, but I think whatever happens does end up happening at the right time. For this chapter, that's three months after the previous one.  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> To anyone who has been keeping up with Asadal (if you still remember, or care to remember), I am so grateful for the support. And to anyone reading for the first time, I am sending my love equally to you. I hope that you enjoy your time reading. I started writing this last summer and I never thought that I'd be continuing to write it now. The school year is drawing to a close; finally, so too is Asadal. By that time, I hope I will have this final chapter out for you. Until then:  
> ♡  
> One chapter remains.


	15. Asadal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a conversation with a mutual, I thought it may be handy to have a little guide book to help visualize elements of the story! Never too late, huh, LOL (This will be added to the beginning notes of every chapter before, as well ♡)  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kbtKJLf7k5DPQx4ETobWbX4VuMYgfO02meHznJr0vn8/edit?usp=sharing

**♡ Jaemin ♡**

 

Waking up next to Jeno was the most beautiful sight that Jaemin had ever seen. 

Jeno’s eyes were shut as he inhaled and exhaled lightly. Strands of soft black hair stuck out at uneven points around his head. He looked so serene when he slept that Jaemin wasn’t sure if he even wanted Jeno to wake up. He just stared. And he kept staring. He wanted to stare at him forever—not to touch him or kiss him or to do anything else. 

Jaemin’s heart started beating faster inside his chest.  _ We kissed _ .  _ Twice _ .  _ I kissed Jeno. Jeno kissed me. We kissed. _ Any way he thought about the night before elicited the same reaction. 

Maybe staring at Jeno wasn’t all he wanted to do.

Jeno’s breathing became more like sighing. His face scrunched up slightly, along with his eyes. Sunlight from the window shone on him, turning him, awake, towards Jaemin.

“Good morning.” 

The way that Jeno sounded made Jaemin’s body feel weak. His voice was boyishly sweet, yet so much deeper and lazier than usual. It was like he was pulling Jaemin into him, though there wasn’t much space for them to get even closer without—

“Good morning,” Jaemin giggled back.

While Jeno’s eyes were more alert, he still spoke in that same sleepy drawl. “What’s up?”

“I just think it’s kind of funny how we’ve already...kissed,” he said, unable to stop giggling, “And y’know, we’re well,  _ here _ , and we still haven’t gone on our first date. It’s like we’re doing things backwards.”

Jeno took his hand underneath their shared blanket. “Is that okay?”

Jaemin giggled again. “Sorry.”

“You’re the cutest.”

Their lips were barely apart when Jeno responded. Jaemin’s friend— _ was that the right word? _ —stared at him coyly, moving towards him. Jaemin shut his eyes and waited for him to come. He opened them to see Jeno laughing at him.

“Hey.”

“Didn’t you say this should come after our first date?”

The younger boy whined. “That’s not what I meant.”

“I wanted to kiss you  _ so  _ much too, but I guess I can’t until our date then,” Jeno teased, knowing very well about what he was doing to Jaemin.

“Who said there was going to be a date?”

Jeno’s hand moved from Jaemin’s to the back of Jaemin’s head and remained there.

“You did.”

Jaemin’s heart pounded. “We should start getting ready then.”

Pleased with the response, the older boy grinned and began to get up from the futon.

Jaemin pulled on Jeno’s arm with both of his own. “Just a few more minutes.”

Jeno stared back. He paused and smiled, climbing back into position behind Jaemin.

“Anything for you.”

♡ ♡ ♡

“Do you own a douche?”

“A  _ what? _ ”

“Don’t act like you don’t know what that is,” said Ten, probably rolling his eyes on the other end of the phone call. “It’s what you fill with water and put inside yourself to make sure you’re clean for Jeno.”

“ _ NO _ , I don’t have one,” Jaemin said in shock.

“Do you need one? I can stop by the pharmacy before I come to your dorm, if you want.”

“Please don’t do that.”

“You need to be ready for anything.”

“I’m not ready for  _ that _ .”

“Exactly.”

“Ten, just come ov—”

If Ten hung up for the sake of buying this for Jaemin, he would not be receiving another phone call from him. Jaemin hoped that his friends, who had already made it to his room, would be  _ a little _ more useful. Lucas stared at Jaemin with a bright grin as he sat on the futon beside Kun, both of whom were equally eager to help Jaemin get ready for his date.

“Did he say anything about where you would be going, Jaemin?”

“He said to wear whatever I wanted, but to also bring a change of clothes to go swimming.”

Lucas’s eyes got bigger. “Nana! Are you going to see your boyfriend shirtless?”

“I guess.”

Kun’s eyes widened likewise. “You never told us that Jeno was your boyfriend.”

“He’s not. We’re just going on a date—it’s our first date.”

“Swimming is fun,” said Kun, nodding. “Like when we went to Chenle’s.”

“Jaemin didn’t swim at Chenle’s,” Lucas clarified. “He was too busy sticking his tongue into Jeno’s mouth on the tennis court.”

“You know that’s not what happened.”

Kun hit Lucas’s arm. “Don’t make things up, Lucas. Jaemin is doing that tonight.” The pair hi-fived each other like high-school boys.

“You too, Kun?”

“I just want this date to go well for you, Jaemin.”

“Does that mean that I have to make out with Jeno?”

“Do you not want to, Nana?”

Jaemin went to his dresser, avoiding the question as he pulled out a lavender pair of swim shorts.

“Ooh~,” Lucas blurted.

“Shut up,” he half-sighed and half-laughed. “I still need to find something to wear to whatever else we’re doing though. I wish he would’ve told me more about it.”

“He wanted to surprise you,” offered Kun.

“Why does it matter what you wear to the date if he’s going to take it off for you, Nana?”

Jaemin launched his shorts at Lucas, hitting him in the head. His face got warm with embarrassment. “I don’t want that to happen tonight.”

“Another night?”

Jaemin’s phone ringing saved him the trouble of throwing something else at Lucas.  _ Ten _ . He decided to answer, if only to stop the teasing for a minute or two.

“I’m here, Jaemin-ah!”

Jaemin scoffed. “I’m coming to the front.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

Quick knocks at the door to Jaemin’s room turned his attention away from the phone call, which Ten ended. The youngest boy in the room opened it to see Ten, grinning under his glasses, with a duffel bag in hand.

“Why’d you call me if you were already outside of my room?”

“I wanted to know that you would’ve went to get me,” he answered. He pushed the bag towards Jaemin. “I think you’ll like it.”

“It better not b—”

“Let us see,” shouted Lucas.

Taking his time unzipping Ten’s gift, Jaemin saw glimpses of what looked like a white string. Inside was a shirt of the same color with a cut-out that went almost all the way down the middle, accented with lines of black on either side of the middle seams. The strings emerged from around the collar, hanging untied around the shirt’s center.

“It’s for your date,” said Ten, satisfied. “You should try it on.”

“Right here?”

Ten looked offended. “I thought we were your friends, Jaemin-ah.”

“Jaemin,” Kun began, “Do you want us to turn around?”

He laughed awkwardly. “You don’t have to do that. I can just try it on over my shirt.”

“You’re not supposed to wear anything underneath, dude,” directed Ten.

“Take it off,” yelled Lucas.

Awkward laughter seemed to be a trend for Jaemin today. “Don’t be weird about it, okay?”

“I’m going to look directly at you the whole time,” Ten said, sticking his tongue out.

“You’re so annoying.”

Jaemin turned away from his friends to face his mirror. He reached the bottom of his t-shirt and lifted it over his head, leaving his upper body bare in his black jeans. His figure looked lean and slender in the mirror. Feeling other eyes looking at him too, he quickly put Ten’s shirt over his shoulders. The light, billowy material felt soft against his body. His fingers attempted to tie the strings across each side of the cut-out, but he couldn’t figure this out on his own. Turning towards Ten, Jaemin accidentally let the strings fall, showing off his chest to his friends in the room.

“So hOt, Nana,” Lucas exclaimed.

Ten agreed. “Mhm.”

“Can you just help me?”

“Here.” Ten gently took a string into each hand and pulled them apart teasingly, prompting Jaemin to jerk away suddenly.

“Hey.”

“Okay, relax. Stay still.” His friend began lacing the strings in and out of his shirt, almost as if he was tying a shoe. Jaemin could feel the shirt get slightly tighter on his chest and stomach. The end result was a criss-cross pattern, forming little “Xs” over his body. “Take a look.”

Jaemin stared at himself in the mirror again, except he took his time. Ten’s shirt was something that he’d never pick out on his own, though this may have been why he liked it so much. He looked older—maybe more mature was the better word—and—

“SEXY,” said Lucas excitedly. He put his hands on his face. “Go out with me instead of Jeno!”

“Stop,” Jaemin said, smiling.

Ten poked at the exposed skin in between the strings of Jaemin’s top. “I’d be jealous of Jeno too. He gets to pull apart all of this,” he continued, touching Jaemin all the while.

Jaemin had to laugh.

Kun looked at him like a proud mother. “Are you wearing these pants too?”

“I’m not going to walk around in my underwear for you guys.”

Ten pouted. “Can I pay to see that?”

“Thank you, Ten. Lucas, Kun, you too,” said Jaemin, gently shoving Ten. The grey-haired boy peeked from behind one of Jaemin’s shoulders. “Let’s finish getting ready now.”

Nerves went in and out of Jaemin’s body while he prepared for his date with Jeno. Saccharine summery songs accompanied his summery style, with SISTAR title tracks being screamed at incoherent, off-pitch levels by the four college boys. His friends managed to make ordinary days into the sweetest memories. The four of them had spent so much of the semester together. Jaemin wouldn’t want anybody else at his side to help him for tonight.

Using a travel-sized flat-iron, Ten made Jaemin’s pink hair into voluminous waves, parting it so that the right side of his hair cascaded over his face while the rest of his forehead was left uncovered. Jaemin didn’t tend to wear make-up very regularly, however, he also let Ten line his eyes with a simple pencil. Part of him felt silly for taking extra effort to impress Jeno—even more than he normally would. It excited him though. Their date was another day together. Different. But the same. So,  _ so _ exciting.

And nerve-wracking.

“You look ready,” Kun said to him. “Do you feel ready?”

Jaemin sighed. His body seemed to move without him. “Kind of.” It was like caffeine was pumping through him. He couldn’t seem to stay still.

“I can tell,” said Ten. “Sit down.”

Ten guided him to the futon, sitting him down next to Lucas. Lucas held him steady, resting his head next to Jaemin.

“Jeno is probably shitting himself right now too, Jaemin,” Ten said, matter-of-factly. “It’s hard to not think about a date as different, but the only thing that’s changed is what you call it. He’s liked you for so long—for as long as you’ve liked him. That hasn’t changed. And it won’t either.”

Kun chimed in from the other side of the futon. “Jeno likes you for you. You shouldn’t overthink it. There’s not a right thing to do or say. You’re just right to him already. Just be yourself.”

“I can’t believe you guys have to tell me to be myself,” said Jaemin.

“It just means you care a lot,” began Ten, “Which is good, as long as you don’t care  _ too _ much.”

Lucas wrapped his arms around Jaemin. “What’s there to worry about, Nana? It’s not like you have to touch a fake dick in front of everyone.”

Jaemin let himself be embraced as he laughed. “I feel like I might embarrass myself even more than that.”

“I guess we’ll have to follow you on your date, to make sure that doesn’t happen,” Ten decided.

“Oh my god!” Lucas let go of Jaemin. “Fat Kun and I can pretend to be a couple.”

“I didn’t agree to that,” Kun announced.

“Not everyone gets this lucky, Kun.”

“When was the last time you got lucky, Lucas?”

“I think I’ll be fine,” Jaemin said, cutting off the two of them. “I think you’d embarrass me more.”

Ten crossed his arms. “What else would we do? Behave?”

A notification on Jaemin’s phone preceded his response:

 

**Jeno:** I’m almost there, Jaemin-ah~

 

The four boys collectively freaked out.

Lucas grabbed the phone from Jaemin’s hands and displayed it with wonder. “What should Nana say back?”

“Give me that,” Jaemin pleaded.

His friend started typing. “I got this. Don’t worry.”

“Don’t say anything to freak him out”

He tossed him back the phone after rapidly smashing the keyboard. “Lessgetit.”

 

**Jeno** : I’m almost there, Jaemin-ah~

 

**Jaemin** : can’t wait baby daddy jeno oPpA come soon Uwu ♡ ♡ luv u xxx

 

“What the fuck?”

Lucas put his hands behind his head. “You’re welcome.”

“Let me see,” said Kun. His eyes read the text over, then over again. “I don’t think Jeno would ever think you wrote this, Jaemin. He knows you’re not illiterate.”

Ten took the phone next. “Should we ask Jeno to send nudes?”

“You guys are the worst,” said Jaemin, snatching back his possession before any more damage could be done.

Lucas took Jaemin back in. “I love you too, Nana.”

“My baby’s going on a date,” Ten play-cried. He joined their hug, shortly followed by Kun, though it soon felt more like Jaemin was being piled on than feeling embraced.

“Can you guys get off?”

“We’re going to stay right here until Jeno comes,” said Lucas, holding Jaemin tighter.

“You can pretend to adjust yourself on his junk later when you spoon,” Ten added.

“Funny.”

Underneath the mass of bodies, the faint light from Jaemin’s phone appeared, along with a text message announcing Jeno’s impending arrival. His sights went to the screen.  Jaemin might have noticed it first, but Lucas reached for it first, letting him go.

“HE’S HERE!”

All heads instinctively turned to the knocking on the door. At once, Jaemin’s friends split off to their respective spots on the futon, allowing Jaemin to prepare himself. Ten tucked pieces of pink hair back into place while Kun made sure that Jaemin’s clothes were wrinkle-free. Without prior permission, Lucas took it upon himself to answer the door as if he was Jaemin’s dad.

“Good evening, young man,” he said, lowering his voice.

Jeno smiled politely, cocking his head ever so slightly. “Hi, Lucas. How are you?”

Jaemin’s substitute father figure crossed his arms. “I’m well. You look very handsome.” He rolled up the sleeves of his teal sweater to his elbows, always ready to flex. “Are you here to see Jaemin?”

“I am, yes.”

“Are you sure?”

His response was more hesitant, tinged with questioning. “I  _ am _ , yes.”

Grinning, Lucas turned inwards. “Nana!”

Jaemin took a deep breath. Not even a full day had passed since he last saw Jeno—since they spent the night together in his bed—though the circumstances were so different. The past twenty-four hours were full of things he had only dreamed of happening.

“Wow.”

The dream kept lasting.

Jeno’s hands went to his mouth, but he kept his stare on Jaemin, taking him in, up and down and again and again. Jaemin could feel himself wanting to look away, amazed by the boy beyond the door and how his expression changed when he saw him. Instead, Jaemin stared back. And there was no way that he was looking away now.`

Jeno’s hair was boyishly messy, in the way that one’s hair would look after someone took the time to intentionally style it to look messily swooped across his face. His backpack was slung over both shoulders. In his white-button up and cream-colored jacket, he was an angel. In the way that his eyes smiled as sweetly as ever, he was the same boy that Jaemin had fallen for.

“Jeno.”

“You’re everything.”

They just stood there, on either side of the door, unable to speak. The pair were in another world. Jaemin caught himself staring at Jeno so many times ever since they met, but it was never quite like this. It was ridiculous how much Jaemin was attracted to him.

“Kiss already,” Ten shouted from his seat.

Jeno’s face melted into his signature adorably confused expression, “Hi, Ten,” he said, smiling. “Hi, Kun.”

“Hi, Jeno. Make safe choices, both of you.” Kun advised, standing up. “And have fun!”

Lucas pointed at Jeno, then at Jaemin, and back at Jeno. “But not  _ too _ much fun.”

“Do whatever feels right,” Ten whispered into Jaemin’s ear as he made his way to the doorway, handing Jaemin his bag.

Jeno nodded and extended his hand. “Jaemin-ah. Are you ready to go?”

“Yes.” Jaemin’s heart and hand got warm when he put it in Jeno’s. Nothing could stop the way that he felt right now.  _ Wait _ . He turned around to his friends. “Are you guys leaving too?”

“Oh, yeah, just let us say goodbye first,” Ten nodded.

Jaemin was a little suspicious. “Okay, I’ll see you all soon then. Good night!”

Jeno waved. “Good night!”

Inside, the three of Jaemin’s friends waved back, shutting the door once Jaemin and Jeno had left, hand in hand, to the hallway.

“Yo,” shouted Lucas indiscreetly, from Jaemin’s room. “Do you know where they’re going?”

Jaemin squeezed Jeno’s hand with his thumb. “Let’s walk faster.”

“Follow me.”

♡ ♡ ♡

Travelling always felt so surreal to Jaemin, especially when he didn’t know where he was being taken. Since being at Daehaekgyo, this feeling was heightened—even more so when he traveled by car. Of course, the circumstances of why he was in this car may have contributed as well. Not to mention who he was in the car with.

“I’m okay with walking too, Jeno,” Jaemin mentioned.

“I don’t want you to walk in the cold,” said Jeno. “I thought it might feel more special.”

Jaemin tried not to smile too wide in case the driver looked back.

“Do you have any idea where we’re going tonight, Jaemin-ah?”

“Not anything more than what you’ve told me.”

Jeno smiled. His face was illuminated by passing lights, but his eyes glew consistently as he stared at Jaemin. “Are you excited?”

“Should I be?”  
“Yes.” He nodded proudly. “I hope so.”

After a few more minutes, the car pulled to a stop, outside a small, indistinct building.  

“Itaewon Market,” said the driver. “Have a good night, you two.”

“Thank you. You, as well,” Jeno replied, opening the car door closest to the curb. He waited for Jaemin to exit before shutting it. “Here is our first stop.”

“Itaewon Market,” Jaemin repeated.

Itaewon Market was unpretentious in appearance, made up of wood and brown bricks. Pops of color came in the form of the green and yellow-striped canopy, which hung above the entrance, and the matching yellow characters which were displayed above the canopy. Jaemin spent the day wondering where his first date with Jeno may have taken him, though he didn’t exactly have this in mind. 

“Grocery store?”

“Jaemin-ah,” mused Jeno, “Do you trust me?” Jaemin’s expression must have betrayed him because Jeno offered his hand again. “Trust me.”

“Okay.”

The interior was not any more or less grand than the outside had teased about the supermarket. Refrigerators lined the dry wall to the left of where the boys came in, with a freezer of individually-packaged ice cream treats almost directly across from the doorway. Unpretentious off-white shelves arranged in vertical columns made up the rest of the store, filled with snacks and soup bases and all the essentials that anyone may need to prepare dinner with. Any empty space was taken care of by stacked cardboard boxes set down alongside shopping carts. To their right, wooden dividers in the shape of an upside-down “L” split off the store’s front section in half, where Jaemin noticed customers seated at tables, amidst the sour smell of kimchi in the air.

“Let’s order, Jaemin-ah,” Jeno said, gesturing to the menu that covered the window.

“Soondubu jjigae,” Jaemin decided. “What are you getting?”

“Jjam ppong. And tteokbokki. I know it’s one of your favorites.”

Jaemin reached for his wallet as Jeno went to the register. “I can pay for myself, Jeno.”

Jeno stood his ground. “Let me pay for you. I want to.”

“Thank you,” he said, softly. “I’ll find a table for us.”

Even though there were only seven total tables in the café section of Itaewon Market, having his dinner paid for flustered Jaemin more than he wanted to admit. He tried to remember Ten’s words.  _ The only thing that’s changed is what you call it. _ He did remember them. But he also knew that he was with the boy he liked right now and he got his dinner paid for by that boy and then he remembered that he was on a date.  _ A date. _ When he finally sat down at an empty wooden table, he was more jittery than he had been standing up.

“Here you go,” said Jeno, returning with two styrofoam cups of water.

“Thank you. And thank you again for the meal.”

“The food hasn’t even come out yet,” he teased.

“I know. Thank you.”

Jeno moved his chair in closer to the table. “You’re welcome.” As he leaned over the table, the tassels of his ribbon dragged across the surface.

Jaemin took the longer piece in his hand. “When did you buy this?”

“Yesterday. I actually bought this outfit yesterday.”

“How come I don’t remember you trying it on then?”

For the first time since they left Danism Hall, Jeno looked somewhat nervous. His eyes wandered from the table to Jaemin. “I wanted to save it for something special. Something like this, with you.”

Jeno knew how to make Jaemin’s heart so full that it hurt.

“What did you do with your friends today, Jaemin-ah?”

“Oh,” Jaemin began, “They were helping me get ready to see you.” He could tell that this response made Jeno happy. Jaemin liked it too. “I was really looking forward to tonight.”

“When did you start getting ready?”

“Uh...I think around one, maybe.”

Jeno did the math in his head. “I left around one. And I picked you up right at seven, like I said I would. Have you been getting ready since I left?”

“It was hard to think about anything else.”

“You don’t need to spend that much time to impress me.”

“I know.” Jaemin’s fingers moved from the ribbon until they interlocked with Jeno’s

“I don’t think I’ll ever be used to you touching me,” Jeno admitted, tightening his grip around Jaemin’s hand.

“Why not?”

“Ah, it’s hard to explain. It’s not that I don’t feel comfortable. It feels right. I just still get as excited as the first time. I’m used to it, but it feels like the first time every time. Does that make any sense?”

Jaemin understood. “I hope there are so many more first times for us.”

“Like what?” Jeno’s ears got as red as Jaemin’s. Not only were they thinking of the same thing, but their silence suggested that they mutually came to the same conclusion:  _ Not yet. _

A bell saved the both of them from saying what “what” was out loud. An old man in an apron brought their food out on a rectangular tray, setting each dish down as steam rose from their surfaces. Jjam ppong for Jeno, soondubu for Jaemin, tteokbokki in between. Next to their respective orders, the man also set down small metal bowls and utensils for each of them.

“Thank you very much, sir” said Jeno.

“Thank you for the food, sir” Jaemin echoed.

Jeno took the bowl from Jaemin’s side of the table, wasting no time to serve Jaemin a portion of his meal. Jaemin watched as spoonfuls of orangey-red broth and seafood and vegetables were poured into his bowl. His date checked his work. He picked up his chopsticks to help him make a proper serving for Jaemin. Jeno finished the bowl off with noodles and more broth, so that the rest of the soup’s contents wouldn’t be eaten dry. He placed the final results next to Jaemin’s soondubu.

“Eat well,” Jeno insisted.

Nodding, Jaemin proceeded to take Jeno’s bowl before he started eating, repeating Jeno’s work with the spicy tofu stew in front of him. He made a note to himself to give Jeno the big pieces of tofu and put it by him when he was done.

“This is a lot of food, Jaemin-ah.”

“I like to see you eat,” he replied. “You look cute when you eat.”

The corners of Jeno’s lips went upwards to his cheeks. “Then I will eat it very well.”

With the food present, Jaemin realized how hungry he was. He hadn’t eaten much earlier, out of excitement for his date, though he spared Jeno this detail since he didn’t want him to worry about him. The moment that his soup hit his tongue, Jaemin’s spoon returned immediately to the bowl.

Jeno laughed, blowing on his own spoon. “Hot?”

Jaemin couldn’t say anything back until he swallowed the tofu. “Thank you. I think you’re not too bad either.”

Jeno shot him an amused look when he realized what Jaemin said. “How is the food, otherwise?”

“Really good.”

“I’m glad you like it.

“How did you find out about this place?”

The dark-haired boy put down his chopsticks. “Some nights, when I had a lot on my mind, I liked to go on walks by myself—not really to anywhere, in particular. It was mainly just to clear my mind.”

“I understand.”

“I’d find myself in a lot of places that I had never seen before. And I definitely got lost, but I’ve been able to discover so many new things to do. This was one of them. After walking around for awhile, I came in to buy some snacks and realized that this café was here too. And then I came again and again.”

Jaemin loved listening to Jeno talk. “Why do you think you keep coming back?”

“Well, the food is good, of course. It reminds me of home and my mom’s cooking. And my dad. It feels comforting, especially when I’m having a hard time.” His tone was certain. “I always think about you too whenever I come here.”

The younger boy was flattered, yet confused. “Why is that?”

“I wanted to take the person who makes me happiest to all of the places that make me happy.”

There was no change in how sure Jeno sounded. Jaemin felt like the tofu dissolving in his stew. Warm and soft and almost melting at the touch.

“How does it feel to finally have me here?”

“Better than I could’ve imagined it...though I never imagined you’d have pink hair when you came,” he laughed. “Why did you decide to dye it again?”

Flashbacks of Jaemin crying during Jisung’s office hours came to mind.

_ Mess. _

“I needed a change,” he stated simply, biting into one of the remaining rice cakes.

“It seems like it helped.”

Jaemin sighed. “It was after a really hard day for me, to be completely honest.”  _ Here it goes. _ “So much was going on between midterms and Seoul’d Out and well, life was just kinda hard at the time.” It was funny to him how talking about this would’ve reduced him to tears, over a month ago. Not this time. “I wasn’t my best self. Even though dyeing my hair didn’t help me fix that, I think it helped me think about myself more.”

The concern in Jeno’s eyes was impossible to miss. He held onto Jaemin’s arm while he spoke. He held his gaze with the same empathy.

Jaemin leaned into Jeno’s half of the table, puckering his lips. “I look cute with this color too, right?”

Jeno backed away as if he were disgusted. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You can say it,” said Jaemin, keeping his ground. “I’ll wait.”

“I think I have somewhere else to be now,” he replied jokingly. He got up from the table and pushed in his chair, taking his backpack towards the exit. 

“Hey, come back!”

Jeno’s eyes were smirking when he faced Jaemin from the doorway. “I’ll wait...only because you’re cute.”

“I’ll take what I can get.”

“Jaemin-ah. Let’s go on a walk.”

♡ ♡ ♡

“Take this,” said Jeno, wrapping his jacket around Jaemin. “I still don’t want you to be cold.”

“What about you?”

“I’d rather have you be warm than me. I’ll be fine. Where we’re going isn’t too far from here, anyway.” Jeno was confident. Despite the wind, he held his shoulders high, with a single backpack strap slung over one of them. He was so handsome, yet such a—

“Dork,” Jaemin teased, tilting his head at Jeno’s back. “Do you think that you’re a cool guy now because you only have one backpack strap on?”

Jeno feigned offense. “I can take my jacket back, if you’re warm enough to make fun of me.”

Jaemin decreased the distance between them on the sidewalk. His jacket smelled like him, clean and fresh and charming. It wouldn’t be coming off anytime soon. Instead, Jaemin grabbed his hand, feeling a surge of the same excited, nervous energy that he had been feeling all day. It didn’t occur to him that this “dating” thing was more different than he thought. His eyes wandered to other people walking by, some of whom looked in the boys’ way. Jeno must’ve noticed as well because he grabbed Jaemin tighter. This wasn’t something that they did before tonight.

“Hey,” said Jeno, gesturing to his backpack strap. “You should feel proud that you’re holding hands with a  _ cool  _ guy.”

“I am, dork.”

Although Jaemin wasn’t familiar with the area around Itaewon Market, the appearance of Greek life houses in the night let him know that they were on South Campus: party campus. Since it was only a little past eight, most people were still preparing for the weekend’s usual line-up of parties, so it wasn’t unusual for it to be so quiet. The views reminded Jaemin of who lived nearby.

“We’re not visiting the NCT bros, are we, Jeno?”

“What would you say, if we were?”

Jaemin tried to think as the lovably ugly neon green building came into view. Suddenly, Jeno stopped in place, causing Jaemin to do the same. Jeno stepped on a half-empty red Solo cup on the sidewalk.

_ Romantic _ .

“Jaemin-ah,” said Jeno, reading his body language, “You still don’t trust me?You should really change that.” He pulled Jaemin’s hand, urging him to keep walking past the fraternity house.

“I was just a little nervous,” he decided.

“Just keep going.”

So, they walked past house after house, moving past fraternities and sororities until Jeno stopped once again. It looked like another sorority house, except the Greek letters were replaced with two plus-signs in brackets. In comparison to the other buildings on this street, this one seemed newer, or perhaps, newly renovated. All of the lights were shut off indoors, though Jeno moved toward a gate at the side, inputting a code into the keypad.  _ Click! _

“Follow me,” said Jeno. “I think you’ll be excited.”

At the backyard of this house was a long, shimmering pool that was similar to Chenle’s in grandeur, but entirely different in terms of mood. Soft pink lights from both within and outside of the pool created an ambient atmosphere, so that even the water resembled something more magical than what it was. Tall blooming shrubbery wrapped around the perimeter like a natural fence, draped by different-sized lanterns. It was unlike any place that Jaemin had seen in Daehaekgyo.

“Wow.”

“I had some friends of my own help me get ready too,” said Jeno. “JinSoul offered to let us spend some time here since her sisters and her are out at a sorority convention this weekend.”

Jaemin was awestruck. “What kind of budget do these girls have?”

“Enough.” Jeno took in the glistening water. “Are you ready to swim?”

“Where should we change?”

“That: she did not tell me about,” said Jeno, regretfully. He faced away from Jaemin. “I promise I won’t look.”

The pink-haired boy had to laugh. “Are you serious?”

“I’ll stand right here until you finish changing.”

If Jaemin could’ve had an another option, he would’ve taken it. He trusted Jeno (even though the past few events may have said otherwise). Still, he felt self-conscious stripping down when he was five feet away from the boy he liked. He heard Mark’s voice guide him in his head.  _ Lessgetit.  _ After undoing Ten’s masterful tiework, Jaemin unzipped the duffel bag he brought with him and took out the swim shorts he had packed. A chill went up his body as he swapped his clothes out, hoping that the pool was heated at all costs.

“Are you done?”

Jaemin looked across at his friend, still respectfully turned around. “Are you?”

“Could you help me untie this bow?”

_ He was adorable when he was whiny. _

Walking over, so he was face to face with Jeno, he caught Jeno staring at him for a second longer than merely noticing he was there. Jaemin put his hands behind his back as an instinct. Jeno was at a loss of words.

“Whoa,” he managed, embarrassing himself, as well as Jaemin. He put his hands over his eyes. “I didn’t mean it like that. Well, I did, yes, but, it came out wrong.”

Jaemin took it as a compliment, in all its awkwardness. “Let’s figure this out.”

The bow around Jaemin’s collar was knotted tightly in the front. Jaemin couldn’t see how to efficiently untangle it from too far away, so he moved closer, placing his pointer fingers on the dotted tassels. He worked in silence, focused on the task at hand until it was—

“Done!” Slowly, his fingers made their way down the tassels while his head moved up, meeting Jeno, inches away. Despite the darkness, Jeno was effortlessly handsome. His eyes shined like the lanterns around them. Their lips were so close together, yet so far away. “There you go,” Jaemin said, eventually. “I can turn around now.”

“Thank you.”

Jaemin thanked the moon for not letting Jeno see him blushing.  _ Why didn’t you just kiss him? _ His heart rate hadn’t yet slowed down, though it probably wouldn’t if the night continued like this.  _ Relax. Take a deep breath. _

“I’m done.”

When Jaemin turned around, his heart beat escalated onsight. In his navy shorts, Jeno’s skin looked quite fair, but his body was undoubtedly toned. Jaemin would’ve been lying if he said that his mind never came across the idea of Jeno shirtless. It always felt wrong before they expressed their feelings to each other. Seeing Jeno now felt just as wrong for different reasons.

_ Whoa. _

What Jaemin said aloud was, “Have you...been working out?”

“When I can.” The smile that formed on Jeno’s face could be described as a perfectly split mixture of pride and bashfulness—an expression that only he could pull off. “Let’s get in the water.” 

Jaemin let himself be pulled again, feeling the sensation beneath his feet change from cement to warm water. Little by little, he went under, all the while holding Jeno’s hand. Against the cold air, the pool felt amazing. The night didn’t seem to be real.

“I think this makes up for not swimming at Chenle’s,” exclaimed Jaemin.

“It’s a little more peaceful,” added Jeno. “And maybe a little prettier.”

“I can’t believe there are still flowers when it’s almost December.” The boys looked at the small blossoms on the shrubs. They reminded Jaemin of the dansim flowers outside his dorm, however, the only traces of pink were around the petals’ edges. Their centers bursted with ruby red while the rest of the flower was white.

“Those are asadals,” Jeno explained. “The flowers that used to grow outside my dorm in the summer are like these, but all-white. Baedals.” Jeno swam to the side of the pool, using the pool’s edge as momentum to lift himself up. Gently, he plucked one flower from the nearest shrub before raising it into the sky and jumping back into the pool. Water splashed around his landing zone upon contact. “For you,” he offered Jaemin, whipping his head above water.

“They’re beautiful.” Jaemin held the flower upwards while he floated. “You splashed me a little bit though,” he said to Jeno. Returning the favor, he flicked his hand at the pool’s surface so water hit Jeno.

“I thought this was going to be a peaceful night,” he said, open-mouthed.

He splashed Jaemin harder with both hands, swimming towards him. This fight transformed into a game, with Jeno being the hunter and Jaemin as his prize. The sounds of splashing and boys’ laughter livened the early Saturday night silence. On his first date with Jeno, Jaemin strangely felt like a kid again, play-fighting the other boy in the pool they had all to themselves. Before he knew it, Jeno snuck up from behind Jaemin and held him at the waist, which caused him to yelp into another fit of laughter. 

The hands on his body turned Jaemin around. Suddenly, he was face to face with Jeno again. Jeno’s black hair hung in damp pieces over his face. Water streaks made his body glisten as he took Jaemin into his arms. Their laughter became just breathing, panting. Breathless. In an instant, Jaemin lost control of all of his senses. The flower slipped from his fingertips. Jeno went forward first, tenderly, then more passionately, putting his lips on Jaemin, who reciprocated each one.

These kisses were not quite the same as the ones that they had exchanged yesterday on Jaemin’s futon. There was no trace of surprise or uncertainty. They were slow, getting deeper with each motion. Jaemin inadvertently put his arms around Jeno’s head as his legs wrapped around the other boy’s waist. It was like they were getting to know each other on a different level, although it was their how comfortable they already were with each other that made the moment so special. When they stopped, they found themselves at the edge of the pool, with Jaemin’s back against the side and Jeno still facing him.

“Jaemin-ah,” said Jeno. “I wanted to do that since the night I saw you again at the retreat.”

“This would’ve been awkward to do there,” Jaemin replied, causing the both of them to laugh. “How did we end up here?”

Jeno went up next to him. “Best friends, right?” They laughed again. “I don’t think it could’ve happened any other way.”

Jaemin’s head found its way onto Jeno’s shoulder. It stayed there. 

“Jeno.”

“Huh?”

“I don’t want to go home yet.”

For awhile, they stayed at the pool’s edge, partially-submerged. Jaemin’s hair looked extra pink with the lanterns strung about the shrubbery. They savored each second. These were only their moments to share.

Jeno tilted his head at his date. “Dry up.”

“What?”

Jeno didn’t have to say it this time.

_ Trust me. _

The boys got out of the pool together, dripping water behind them before they reached their towels. Time had passed so quickly while they were there, though it was as if time didn’t exist at all. Jaemin could never spend too much time with Jeno. He looked over at him, a towel wrapped around his waist as he tried to dry his hair.

“Where to, baby daddy Jeno oppa?”

Jeno looked like he almost lost his towel. “Did you actually write that text?”

“I think it was Shakespeare, to be honest.”

Despite Jeno’s date being a comedian, he forgot to bring some clothes to change into. “I don’t want to get a car seat wet.” He had put Ten’s shirt back on, but stayed in his swim shorts. “Maybe we can walk?”

“Let’s run,” he blurted.

With all two of his backpack straps on and Jaemin’s duffel bag in one hand, Jeno extended his free hand to Jaemin.  _ So, he was serious, huh.  _ Once the gate was locked, they did exactly what they said they would do.

Run.

Jaemin and Jeno were wet and tired, yet they were young and free, and they ran. They ran and skipped and jumped to unwritten background music, dancing in the moonlight with their arms linked together. Their course was set across campus. The stares of other students and residents were of no trouble.  Jaemin let himself go. He let himself soak in every part of what he was experiencing. His life was a dream and a reality. His legs ached, he laughed too loudly. 

He was alive.

Plain shrubs met them outside of their destination: Baedal Hall, a rather classic-looking building of stone and brick, in comparison to most of Daehaekgyo’s glassy, modern campus. Unlike his own dorm, Baedal Hall was actually a series of connected structures, so that the academic department, dining hall, and residential hall were separate but together around a square courtyard, the center of the complex. High pillars served as the foundation for a covered walkway towards the residential entrance. Jaemin realized it once Jeno swiped his student ID card over the scanner outside the double doors.

“I’ve never been here before.”

“Welcome,” Jeno smiled, guiding him to the elevator beyond another set of doors and a scanner for his housing card. Inside, Jeno pushed a button with his pointer finger.  _ Sixth floor.  _ They went left down a long carpeted hallway, taking another left until they reached the second-to-last door on the right. Room 12. ”Jeno,” “Renjun,” and “Jisung” were written in black marker on different pictures of Pikachu faces. “Stay here, Jaemin-ah.”

“Are we not going in?”

Jeno shook his head and disappeared, reemerging no more than five minutes later in a bright green crew neck and brown plaid pajama bottoms. He brought some new things with him, including blankets, pillows, and some clothes, which he tossed to Jaemin.

“You can change in the suite bathroom,” he said, pointing him in the right direction. “I’ll be out here when you’re done.”

Jeno’s instructions led Jaemin left past a pair of sinks and mirrors at the side of the boys’ shared bedroom. Further back in this space, the bathroom was like that of a single-person restroom, equipped with a shower as well as the toilet. Jaemin did as he was told, exchanging Ten’s shirt for Jeno’s black and blue hoodie.  _ I’m not giving this back.  _ He put the shirt, along with his damp shorts, into the duffel bag. The white sweatpants that Jeno had given him were nice and cozy. He took a pillow and blanket from Jeno on his way down the hall.

“You look better in my clothes than I do,” joked Jeno, locking the door.

“After you.”

Back in the elevator, Jeno hit another button.  _ Ten.  _ Jaemin could feel the adrenaline go through him with each passing floor.  _ Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.  _ The doors opened to a floor that looked exactly like the others had, but Jeno went straight to the right end, where two narrow-ish flights of stairs led up to somewhere on the other side of a heavy, metal door.

“Here we are,” announced Jeno.

They were in the night again. On the rooftop of Baedal Hall, Jaemin could see across campus as buildings mingled with the stars. He didn’t bother asking if they were allowed to be there before the pair started setting up makeshift beds for the night. The wind blew lightly at Jeno’s hair while he tucked himself under his blanket. His eyes smiled, robbing the sky of two glittery, crescent moons. He was so beautiful, without having to try or think about how he looked.

“I can’t believe this is my life right now.”

Jeno watched him instead of the stars. “I feel the same way.”

Looking at Jeno and up at the world around him, Jaemin found himself reminiscing about the past and all of the work that he’d put in to make it to this point and where he’d go next when his work was done. He was so close to finishing his first semester as a student at Daehaekgyo. This realization amazed him. Freshman year so far taught him how to cry and laugh and be lonely and meet new friends and hate himself and learn how important embracing himself actually was. Jaemin saw his life flash by in seconds. His parents, his friends, Jeno, himself, at his side. His throat choked up. He reached into his bag for the asadal flower that Jeno had plucked for him, feeling a tear begin to roll down his cheek.

“Jaemin-ah.” Jeno wiped the tear away with his sleeve. He kissed him where the droplet had been, using his fingers to smooth the area on Jaemin’s face where it had been.

Jaemin reached for Jeno’s hand, not leaving the flower behind but ridding himself of the uncertainty that he had built up over the past few months.  _ Almost there.  _ His heart was full. Jaemin and Jeno were on top of the world, or at least, the world as they knew it—the world was theirs. The sky was their Highway to Heaven.

Sniffling, Jaemin met Jeno’s eyes as they stared at the asadal flower. The pure, white of the petals were evocative of the boy that Jaemin was holding hands with. But the pink reminded them both of Jaemin, leaving its rosy color on the flower’s pale edges. Its center burned deeply red, like the stars above and like their hearts within. Even the upcoming winter hadn’t taken the asadal with it yet. It would stay between the two boys, their first and last.

  
  


**Blossoming.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the time I really started finishing this chapter (and this entire story), I was aboard a plane with its final destination being Madrid, Spain. About a week before, I had the most amazing week, including being able to see NCT 127 with my best friend in Chicago. It was truly one of the best experiences of my entire life. It strengthened my love for the boys, their music, and for myself. These boys started it all for me and they'll always be my favorites. No doubt about it.
> 
> As I was writing this story and the accompanying guide book, I looked through all of what I had written and the accompanying NCT moments that I've drawn inspiration from and was able to reflect on what a process this has been. I started writing Asadal almost a year ago. Shortly before that, being an NCTzen is what got me into K-Pop at the beginning of 2018. There were many times where I wasn't sure I would ever finish writing, or if I would just give up entirely, though it's the constant presence of NCT in my life that motivated me to keep going. NCT, this story, and myself have grown so much in that time period since 2018. It's crazy to think that writing this has been such an emotional journey for me, but I think that's because I feel so connected to the boys of NCT—they help cheer me up, even on the worst days, help me celebrate my best days, and help me connect to myself and others around me.
> 
> Before I left for Madrid, I had a realization that I really loved where I was at in a moment where I ran home to my apartment for the last time until I come back from Europe. My ears were blasting with "Highway to Heaven," and I ended up making it to my apartment, with tears of joy in my eyes because I couldn't believe how happy I was in that instant. Even though Asadal is very much so a love story, I wanted to end it with this feeling that connects to myself, the boys, and hopefully, to you, as well. I'll admit that I've experienced many hardships since arriving to Spain on Thursday. Somehow, NCT and writing this has helped me fly higher through it all. Let us take the Highway to Heaven together. I'm forever proud to be an NCTzen. Thank you for reading.
> 
>  
> 
> And this was "Asadal."  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> ♡  
> (P.S. Buy and stream NCT 127's next EP, The 4th Mini Album ‘NCT #127 WE ARE SUPERHUMAN’ on May 24th, 2019! ♡)
> 
>  
> 
> —porkjihoon  
> To the world, we are NCT! ♡


End file.
